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My Mother, who is 92 on Friday has, in the last year, being going downhill, mentally, with vascular dementia. For her age, she was remarkable active, going shopping, walking far more, and further than people 15 years younger. She has been living with me for the last 3 years but the rate of mental deteriation is very difficult to cope with.

She is currently in a 'stepdown' accommodation, halfway between hospital and a nursing home/home. The Consultant in Elderly Care does not think she will ever be able to return home, something which is very hard to accept. Dementia is like a living death, the person you have known is no longer there in mind, just the body.

3 Replies

I m so sorry Gornfishing, I know what you are going through, I lost my precious Mum-in-law to Dementia. It's the most cruel of diseases, my heart goes out to you, XX


GF, I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. These things are tragic. Last year my father was diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer's (he was then only 64 years old, now 65). He's fairing pretty well, but I do see him gradually losing it, and with that I'm gradually losing him. It's still early stages, but it's difficult to see and to cope with nonetheless. In May of this year he was also diagnosed with bowel cancer for which he had emergency surgery, but has also had to have chemotherapy (still on-going). He's done quite well in terms of side-effects from the chemo, but as the treatment progresses he's getting increasingly tired, and with this come difficulties in compensating for the Alzheimer's. I'm hoping that once the chemo finishes early next year that he'll get his strength back and then more ability to compensate for the Alzheimer's, but this might be wishful thinking. It might also be dependent on whether or not the chemo has worked or whether he needs further treatment. It's tough. My heart goes out to you, GF.



hi i'm so sorry to hear that your mum has dementia, i have worked with people with dementia for the last 8 year, i have seen it and the begining and the end, and how hard it is for all the family members to watch there loved one go tho it.the only thing i can say is go day by day, try to remember the good times and forget the bad,go and see her as much as possable.try to remember she is unawhere what is going, try to make her as happy as you can,if you need to talk or ask anything just send my a messages.take care


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