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Why do they have to grow up

In 2 days 2 of my wonderful children pick up AS and A2 results I am nervous wreak. My eldest will be 20 in October, which brings me to this post why do they have to grow up? I am gradually fading out of their world from being the most important person in it when they were born to now, when a text to say they are not coming home tonight is about as close as I get being part of their world. We are still close but I miss them so much as they go off and do their own thing, Mike was away camping this weekend and every day I thought of him I missed him coming up and taking the micky out of me and making me laugh until my ache. Maddie is now splitting herself half and half with home and Bristol but where-ever Maddie is Hamid is too, getting Maddie/Mummy time is almost impossible, I am so proud of her and Hamid is just wonderful but we used to do such mad things together and have such fun. Nicko can't decide what he wants to do next and I can't seem to reach him, I can't fathom what is going through his mind and I must not live his life for him he has to sort it out for himself! I have spent the last 20 year devoted to doing my poor best to be the best mum I could be to them and I know I need to sit back and let them get on with it but it does not make it any easier. Even Josh starts GSCE's next year.

I am so proud that despite me they are fabulous young people I just feel a bit redundant today.

Sorry for the rambling slush, feel free to put me on your ignore list as totally barking!


4 Replies


You've done a brilliant job to get them where they are today and thet doesn't just stop. The very fact that you get a text to say I'm not coming home shows you are still up there in terms of importance!

Just think you'll be free to do whatever you want, health aside and just as you get used to feeling redundant something will happen and they'll all be back demanding dinner ironing an ddriving you nuts.

Must admit feeling a bit out of sorts myself as twins start school in 4 weeks and for first time in nine years will not be at home with a preschooler. Very odd!


I'm sure you are a wonderful mum Bex, I am 19 now but I still need my mummy as much as i did when i was little- just takes more to make me admit it these days :)





Hey bex,

I had a fab relationship with my mum while i was growing up (disagreed a fair few times thou!) and I used to ring her a lot while I was at uni. I'm 26 now and I'm so glad she gave me the freedom she did because it gave me my independance and taught me I can do anything! The best part is now I have a little lady of my own we are even closer and I have someone to rant at when 'm fed up of wathcing the tweenies and falling over the building blocks i just put away.

We still do very random things together - we have midgie & Bubby & mummy days (Nanny still doesn't sit very well with my mum!!) and my other half goes out with his dad to bike meets!

Sounds like you are a fab mum and you have a great relationship with your kids... i have to admit im not looking forward 2 the teenage years however i have a long way to go yet... mind u I can't quite get my head around the fact Alys is actually going to be one in just 2 weeks!

Sorry not entirely sure any of this actually made any sense!


midgie x


Thanks folks, midnight ish last night I am tucked up in bed asleep and I get a call from eldest son, ""my cars battery is flat what should I do"", it seems call the AA did not cross his mind until I reminded him that I paid for breakdown cover for just such emergencies. It seems they still need a mum as they have yet to develop common sense!


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