Psychological/ intimacy issues with L... - Gynae Cancer Support

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Psychological/ intimacy issues with Lichen Sclerosis?

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Hi all, I have just joined today.

I was diagnosed with LS a few months back after suffering on and off for the last few years and after a very aggressive flare up. My mum also has LS and has had cancer of the vulva as part of it. This has been devastating news for me as I know how this has affected my mum's life. I am 33 and currently single and I won't lie but getting close to someone scares me as having to have the conversation with someone I'm newly dating is far from ideal. I have dated a few people this year and it seems that as soon as we get intimate I seem to lose interest in them. Those butterflies seem to go and I kind of 'check out'. Don't get me wrong - I don't do anything I don't want to but in the past becoming intimate with someone would make me like them more/ feel more close to them. I have just started dating someone who on paper is everything I've ever wanted. I was really excited about him and looking forward to seeing where things went until we were intimate at the weekend. I had a flare up and was in a LOT of pain to the point I couldn't bare him touching me during our first time together. The next day I explained and he was really understanding but since them I've not been as interested in him. We have been intimate since then and he was lovely about it and I wasn't in any pain etc. I thought maybe it was because the first time was a bit traumatic that it had put me off but since then it has been great. I don't know why but I'm just not as keen now and I can't find any logical reason for it.

I just wondered if anyone else with LS or any Gyn problems has had a similar issue. I'm trying to work out if he's just not right for me or if it's a psychological issue I have developed because of LS as there seems to be a theme linked with sex for me now and losing interest. I'm not consciously thinking - 'oh I have LS and don't want to get close to someone'. I'm actually quite relaxed about it now I've told him but it just seems weird timing for any feelings to have disappeared.

Sorry if too much information - I'm new and joined to see if anyone had any similar experiences.

I have been single a couple of years now and like most have been hurt in the past so it could be a combination of things but was curious as to the psych effects of LS/ Gyn problems.

Thanks in advance!

1 Reply
AskEveTeam profile image
AskEveTeam

Hi HelenS1983, welcome to Health Un-locked.

We are sorry to hear about the tough time you have been having recently.

You were asking about the psychological effects of LS and gynae problems.

So for many women the fear of being intimate when having a flare up and having to explain their health situation is daunting. To put this into perspective many women WITHOUT a medical health issue relating to their genitalia feel that there is something “wrong” with their anatomy and don’t know how to put this into words thus putting them off intimacy and relationships.

However, it is not uncommon to hear from women who have psychological issues originating from their gynae conditions.

If you would like to talk to someone in confidence you can call our Ask Eve Nurse on 08088020019 or email on nurse@eveappeal.org.uk

Wishing you well,

The Ask Eve Team

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