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Action on Postpartum Psychosis

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Music

Bumblebeeee profile image
4 Replies

Hi I haven’t been around for a while sorry. I just feel abit strange. I heard a song today but it just feels so different. When I was ‘unwell’ this particular song I used to play over and over again. It’s like it was a song for me and I could feel the energy from the song rushing through my veins. In a strange like euphoric feeling that made me feel like I could fly. Today I heard the song for the first time since being really unwell nearly 2 years ago now. But I have no feeling. Sorry no point to this post but it’s just weird trying to process how I feel nothing for this song now when it had ment so much to me at the time x

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Bumblebeeee profile image
Bumblebeeee
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4 Replies
Lilybeth profile image
LilybethVolunteer

Hi Bumblebeeee

No need to say sorry you haven't been around, ....it's only if and when you feel like it :)

I think there is a point to your post about the effect music can have to lift us when we are feeling so low. You have battled so hard through the last few years to be out of that dark place Hearing a record over and over was a comfort then, just like it was for me too and many of us here I imagine.

The record I played over and over to give me a lift years ago still means something to me but like you, I'm in a much better place now. So I think you should look at it as a positive feeling that you have moved on?

One record I used to listen to over and over was "I'm going all the way" by Sounds of Blackness. The words meant so much at the time .... the chorus of which was "Whatever it takes to make it I'm going all the way, I may be down sometimes but I won't be down always ......." It was in my head all the time, first heard in a shoe shop and seemed so relevant! I can listen to it all these years later and still enjoy it but as you say, it's different now.

I still relate some music today to PP, especially "I'm still standing" by Elton John which is my shout out that I am still here! Thankfully we are all still standing and I think you should be really proud that in a way it's a sign that you have moved on. ❤️ Take care.

Bumblebeeee profile image
Bumblebeeee in reply to Lilybeth

Thanks for replying. I will listen to those songs, I don’t think I have heard them before. My song was the song from wicked, even tho I had never seen wicked. I have no idea how I came across this sound. But the defying gravity song. I made me feel invincible like I could fly and do anything. I guess I miss that feeling abit so I’m abit sad, as iv just been stuck with the crappy depression for so long now 😕

Lilybeth profile image
LilybethVolunteer in reply to Bumblebeeee

You're so welcome Bumblebeeee ... we are all here for each other. The songs I mentioned can be found on YouTube. "I'm still standing" is great to watch too as it was filmed in France and so the beach and dancing might give you a lift, as it does for me :)

I'm sorry you're a bit sad but you have come so far and depression is so hard to get over. My depression after psychosis lasted for a year or more and it was very difficult. Even on a sunny day I couldn't lift my mood.

I've read your "Recovery" post and don't think you should be so hard on yourself. Sometimes everything is such an effort and my self care went out of the window for a long time. Especially at the moment when you can't go out, it's a lot to keep little ones occupied and have a minute to yourself. I hope that when we are allowed out, you might treat yourself and be able to have a break.

You have been amazing ... challenging yourself and going for an interview for a course you were interested in; sharing your inspiring poetry. You will eventually recover from your depression but need to be proud of yourself for all you have come through so far.

Take care.

mikefff profile image
mikefff in reply to Bumblebeeee

You can have different music for different moods/times... What peice of music inspires you right now?? I like take on me by aha currently.

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