Social distance

[bravesurvivor411]

Hi everyone,

I havent posted in awhile. Im doing well mood wise and meds are good but I have felt very isolated at work. I feel like I am distancing myself from co workers. Some of them do know about my episode and struggles this summer. It just makes me want to cry when I hear other teachers ( im a teacher too) talking and having fun in the hallways and I just want to be left alone in my room. Ive always been somewhat of a loner in the past but now it feels very isolating and lonely. Can anyone relate.

[Mims2014]

I'm not back at work yet but sometimes feel isolated at mother and baby groups. You have done so well to get back to that job, you are stronger than most so be proud x

[Jenny_at_APP Partner]

Hi,

It's good to hear you're doing well but sorry to hear you're struggling a bit at work.

I work in an office which I'm sure is much easier than being a teacher in that I could just hide away a bit. I hope it's not too stressful and that you're getting plenty of support. My immediate colleagues knew what had happened to me and were (and are) great but I still wouldn't say it was easy.

It is a very isolating illness. It was such a relief to find the APP website and this forum, to find other people who really understand.

I hope things improve. It's such a knock to go through PP. Sending you very best wishes.

[Naomi_at_app Volunteer]

Hi bravesurvivor411

I'm really sorry to hear that it's a struggle at work at the moment. Are you feeling low and isolated in general or has it mainly been at work?

A couple of things came to my mind that might help in this phase as you get used to the transition back to work and socialising after a serious illness. Firstly I wondered if you had thought about having some counselling to talk about your feelings in more depth and help you to find ways to be extra brave and not isolate yourself in your room.

Secondly I wondered if there were any staff social activities that you could join or something outside of school like a choir to help build your social confidence again.

I can really identify with that feeling of being close to tears when others seem to be finding socialising so easy. I've been feeling that recently in my group of mum friends and for me it seems a bit fuelled by low confidence after periods of illness. But I think what I'm learning is it's worth being brave as it's the best way to rebuild that confidence.

Hope it helps to know you are not alone. Keep being brave.

All the best

Naomi x

[bravesurvivor411 in reply to Naomi_at_app]

Thanks for the advice Naomi. I have a wonderful therapist. I havent seen her in several weeks due to her changing offices. But I have an appt next week. I was a part of mental health support groups. But I felt like it made me focus even more than I already do on the illness. So I recently joined our city art league and soon the garden club will start! I feel like I am ready for this step. Other than work I also feel isolated with other moms. Unless they had ppd or pp which was one of the groups I was a part of. I feel like I compare myself to other moms and I dint measure up. I also get really jealous when I hear other parents talk about the joys of parenting because I still have a lot of resentment towards my son. I definitely will be working through these feelings with my therapist but in the mean time its great to post on this forum

[Naomi_at_app Volunteer in reply to bravesurvivor411]

Hi bravesurvivor411

Really glad to hear you have a good therapist, and that you are making steps to join clubs and societies outside of work. It's really hard to regain that confidence so you should be really proud of those steps.

I know it's really easy to measure ourselves up to other mums and also to feel jealous of how much easier it has been for them. I think this is part of the grief process of recovery and it's OK to feel this way, just to know that most mums feel 'lacking' when they compare themselves with other women!

I'm really glad you have found the forum - it's a great safe place to be able to share how we really feel. Well done for all you are doing to rebuild your confidence and your social life after PP, you are a brave survivor indeed.

Naomi x

[bravesurvivor411 in reply to Naomi_at_app]

Thank you for your support Naomi! Take care