The worse thing about all this is the worrying about other people

The worse thing about all this is the worrying about other people

I tend to worry about upsetting people. I don't like to let people down with arrangements, I guess most of the time that's why I don't make any, it's better for me that way.

Most of the people around me are fine with that they have somehow blended in with the way i am, which is good...

I have a couple of recent friends as I am new to my area, and when I got here I was ok, not going through any anxieties etc...problem is I don't want these people to know I suffer and it's a small area of people in a small place so tell one and you tell them all, if you know what I mean. They presume I'm going to be there at functions and there are a couple coming up, unfortunate for me one of people who organises this is a very possessive type and does take offence if you don't go, as I am liked this person will do anything to get me there, I'm not good at telling lies. So when I get the call,text I have decided just to say I can't make's annoying, and sad because its because I'm not well I'm not going and do not wish them to know. Why do people have to be like this I would never push someone, I would ask and say I'd love you to be there but wouldn't make an issue of it. Sometimes it makes me feel angry too. It puts unnecessary pressure on me. I have tried to explain in a nice way I like to do my own thing, but it falls on deaf ears...

This person has now invited someone who I won't see often, and in passing the other day said 'oh you will have to come as ..... Is coming down' it seems to me some people will go to any lengths to force you to do something and its one of my anxieties....without going into too much detail this person has a vetted interest in getting numbers to the venue,

Then when I do decide to go makes snide comments about me not going , I really do not need this rubbish.......

4 Replies

  • Morning Luv..... Im exactly the same as you........... people bully you cos youre nice and they know they can get away with it..

    Have a look for this book, it may help you....

    A woman in your own right by Anne Dickson..... assertiveness and you

    I think it will really help you!!

    Ker xx

  • Morning.

    Yes I was going to put about it being bullyish, it is..and yes your right , they take advantage because they can see I'm uncomfortable saying's so good when someone understands :)

    I'm going to check out the book you recommend. Got my 2nd session of one to one CBT this afternoon, so I've got to go out which is probably a good thing :)

    Thanks Kerry, appreciate knowing others are similar

    Sue xx

  • :-) Really try and get the book, im sure it will be on amazon or something... it really helped me and I go back to reading it when Im suffering, I really think it will make sense to you......

    let me know how your session went...

    Ker xx

  • Will do , and thanks again xx

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