Thank you all for your kind words, thank you doesn't seem enough but it's all I have. I made it through the funeral and the booze up afterwards, me and my daughter were the last ones out of the pub at a respectable 3.40am. I had a couple of his mates try and have a subtle dig at me and I was so proud to hear myself say you only know one side of the story so until you know the other you can fuck right off. And they did lol don't cross an Irish redhead when drunk.
The chapel was so full people were standing at the back. Me and my daughter followed the coffin in. I was shaking sooo much I thought I was going to buckle to my knees. The service was lovely, I am so proud of my daughter who organised everything and has been so strong. I love her more than life and I need to start looking after myself now as I don't want to leave her alone.
My meds have been doubled and I now have sleeping pills which I only take if I need to. Still no counselling as they yet again have not got back to me. Anyway onwards and upwards.
Thank you all again for your support, thank you why why and my lips are sealed lol xxx big squeeze hugs to you all. Xxx