BACK TO SQUARE 1?

[izzywhizz]

Hi, I haven't posted on here for a couple of months as I was feeling so well and thought I might be better - have been on 40g of Citalopram since July and have just started CBT but over the last couple of weeks all the horrible feelings have crept back and the physical symptoms are back as well. My jaw is aching with being tense, bad stomach, short tempered - the list could go on forever. Am i expecting too much too soon or is the way my life will be forever? If it is then I just don't think I can carry on. I'm so scared of going back to the way I was before I had my meltdown. Can anyone offer any advice please as i'm so scared. thank you

[missautumn]

Hi izzy, I'm new on here and have only recently been to the doctors with my problems (which sound very similar to yours) and currently on the waiting list for cbt, so I don't really have any advice on what you should do next... but I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone in this. I know that each day can be different for us with anxiety... some days you feel like you can get through this, and some days you wish you were someone else... you might be scared to go back to how you was but you need to remember that you did make progress and you did begin to feel better. So even if there is a slight possibility that you do go back to square one... you know that you can feel better, because you proved that to yourself! Don't give yourself a hard time and I'm sorry I can't offer you any advice x

[Hidden]

Hi. izywhizz. You are having a 'setback'. Sometimes, when we start a new course, or look for help, we are reminded of our previous trouble and, and, sure enough, with SENTISATION not completely healed, we fall into the trap of thinking "IT" has returned or "IT" will return if we are not careful. Memory can play some rotten tricks on us. DO NOT BE AFRAID of the feelings. I KNOW what you are going through as we all do. 'Setbacks' can be very upsetting but they are only the return of 'symptoms' and do not necessarily mean you are going back to your original state. Now I do not know how you came out of it before but look back and use the same method. Or did you just get well without knowing why? This is the problem with 'getting over' something. We need a method to help if things get 'tough' again. Now try and relax in a chair (not lie down) and just ACCEPT how you feel for the moment. You will not always feel like this and you WILL come out again but try and use ACCEPTANCE as your magic wand. It will work if you give it TIME. Slump, relax, be kind to yourself. Do not flog yourself with self defeating thoughts. Difficult? I know. But it does and will work for you. Expecting too much too soon can lead to frustration and you do not want that. Try and be patient with time. Love and blessings. jonathan.

[izzywhizz]

Hi missautumn, thank you so much for replying it means a lot. this site is so reassuring as it makres me realise that i'm not on my own and there are some people who are much worse than me. I am struggling at the moment but you are right I know that I can get throught this blip. Just you replying has helped so thank you. I hope you start to feel better soon and that CBT helps - i've just started so am waiting to see if it does help. Take care. Let me know how you are xx

[missautumn in reply to izzywhizz]

I'm glad to hear that I've helped in some way it sounds like we're in similar situations at the moment so it's comforting to know that there are people out there who do understand what you're going through... Hope you feel better soon and keep posting to let us know how you're getting on x

[izzywhizz]

Thank you Jonathan. You gave me good advice before and you have again x

[Pennylayne]

I think Jonathan's advice is spot on too and the acceptance of feelings even if they are unwanted ones really helps.

It's a sort of acceptance of yourself anxiety and all.

Personally I sometimes feel that the anxiety is a sort of 'weakness' and that it has power over me but of course it's really a physical thing caused by variations in the way our brains are wired and the way we use the chemicals produced by our brains.

If we had symptoms caused by having an under active thyroid for example we would just get ourselves treated with thyroxine ......it's really a similar thing.

Also we have just come to the darkest time of the year, the clocks have changed and winter is here. All of this produces chemical changes in our brains just as it does in the brains of all animals. Some animals hibernate and many go into a more quiet and energy conserving mode, it's hardly surprising we feel a downwards turn and the need to sleep more and eat comfort food etc. For those of us with anxiety I think it's a difficult time as we feel the lack of sunlight and dip in energy.

Also your CBT will require energy and concentration not to mention effort and facing what is causing the anxiety.

Things change all the time and you are going through a time of big readjustment .......give yourself the space to let it happen and you may very well find yourself moving on to the next stage in no time.

[Hidden in reply to Pennylayne]

Hi. Pennylayne. It's called SAD and I also have problems with it but not so much as before. There are lamps you can get and sit in front of for an hour or so but I did not find them useful. I have come to the conclusion that one has just to 'ride it out'. I agree entirely about Winter and the animals. Do you not think that hibernation is a good idea?? Lets dig ourselves a hole, crawl in and come up in the Spring.! Nature is much more sensible than we are. Look after yourself. jonathan.