I'm lost.: I finished college/sixth form in... - Anxiety Support

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I'm lost.

Nic1194 profile image
11 Replies

I finished college/sixth form in June, my 'so-called-friends' have now all been accepted into university and shall be going in September.

But I'm like a lost puppy. I have no idea what to do with myself or my life. I definitely don't want to go to University (for a number of reasons), I also don't want to back to a college, as I couldn't go in alone and I'm sick of education. So the only other option is a job. I don't want a job like working in a store as that would be too much for me, the only jobs I'm interested in either have no vacancies (as they're small businesses) or I need qualifications (therefore needing Uni or college again).

I really don't know what to do, I was getting help for my Social Anxiety/Emetephobia and was doing very well, but now I've finished I'm going backwards again and daren't go out. I'm hoping once school holidays are over I can go out more again (as that's what's stopping me at the moment) but I'm getting sick of everyone asking. And it's making me think 'what the hell am going to do.'

To make matters worse, both sets of parents (divorced so 2 homes) are doing my head in and I kind of want to leave, but I can't even house sit for one night so there is NO WAY I can live alone and all my friends are moving elsewhere with Uni, so I can't live with them.

I thought things were getting so much better, but now, everything's going out the window.

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Nic1194 profile image
Nic1194
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11 Replies
Fifi_loves_rosie profile image
Fifi_loves_rosie

Hi nic, What type of small businesses are you interested in working for?

Nic1194 profile image
Nic1194 in reply to Fifi_loves_rosie

Well floristry is the one I need qualifications for (or at least go on courses). But the small things are just little things near where I live- as I can't drive and don't like public transport either- like a craft shop and a small garden centre.

Fifi_loves_rosie profile image
Fifi_loves_rosie in reply to Nic1194

Could you do open university for any of the qualifications you need? Or could you see if they will allow you to do work experience for a couple of days for free as from experience I know that if they see you are good and willing they're more likely to hire you when a job does come up. It's hard but try to stay positive otherwise you are probably unlikely to keep pushing yourself

Nic1194 profile image
Nic1194 in reply to Fifi_loves_rosie

Yeah, I was looking into OU a while ago, but I was looking into history at the time so I could see if anything else looks good. The work experience is a good idea, I did go into 3 florists in my area and ask but they couldn't take me on, but I may try other places. Thanks a lot. :)

rose12 profile image
rose12

These are difficult times for anyone but even worse if you suffer from anxiety. Hang in there something will point you i the right direction just focus on what would make you happy, what sort of work are you drawn to and then go from there. Use the careers services too. Try not to blame your friends for moving away as they have their own path to follow, and parents , well all you can do is let them get on with sorting themselves out I guess. Best wishes to you x

Nic1194 profile image
Nic1194 in reply to rose12

Yeah. Thanks. :) I hope it does, my dad's fine with me finding my way but my mum's badgering me to get on and do something. I'm happy my friends are going down their path so really the only thing I blame is my anxiety.

Thanks a lot. Best wishes to you too. :) x

rpaul profile image
rpaul

I feel you. Try the kechara wish fulfilling chakras as it help removes difficulties and obstacles you are going through.

Hi Nic, don't worry about being left behind. University is not the be-all and end-all they make it out to be. By the time you have had your first job most people aren't interested in degrees anymore. Find out what you want to do and go with it. Take some time to do some work experience for a bit so you can get an idea of what you really like. If you want to do floristry maybe the garden centre would be a start....that would give you a knowledge of plants and flowers and may really help whilst you look into courses. Good luck. Karen x

Nic1194 profile image
Nic1194 in reply to

I agree, everyone says University or nothing, but it isn't like that! Yeah, I keep looking for work experience but most places turn me down, so I'll keep looking. The garden centre idea is a good plan. Thanks Karen. :) x

Si0608 profile image
Si0608

Hi Nic. I suffer from social anxiety and panic attacks. I have been studying with the OU since 2006. I am about halfway through my degree. Partially related to my panics/anxieties. Through having some good friends I am getting back on track. My key issue was accepting having a disabilty, with the panics/social anxiety and asking for the relevant disabilty support. If you ever go down the OU route, I would say you are definately entitled to disability support and don't be afraid to talk to the OU about your social anxiety. All the best whatever you do.

Nic1194 profile image
Nic1194 in reply to Si0608

Thank you. I did actually look at the disability bit but didn't think I would be accepted. I have actually been looking this morning at OU and there are a few starter course I'm interested in, just to see how I get on. Do you have to go into a University often for lectures or does it depend on what course you choose? As I can't even sit through a lecture. :/ Thanks a lot again. Hope everything goes well for you- anxiety and OU. :)

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