Hi everyone so i posted ages ago about dealing with toxic friends. So my anxiety got really bad and i took a couple of days off because i was worried about what was going to happen as i did something wrong which i take full credit for and I regret but shes dragging it out telling other people about me stuff like oh shes doing this and shes doing that and stuff like that and i told some of my friends about what was going on and she found out and was denying the fact that she said anything and they thing that annoys me is that we agreed to be mutual and not even an hour later she’s talking about me to everyone. Theres these toxic girls too and they don’t like me and theyre on her “side” and this other guy hes going up to her and asking her if i said anything and shes going yeah she told me this and that so couldn’t you argue that she broke my trust aswell shes being really petty and cruel. My anxiety has also gone up a little as im worrying what I should do for school. And it just sucks but the thing is since ive been doing yoga and exercising my anxiety has gone down a little and im more confident in public i went out the other day and i felt relaxed its just in that location in school its just overwhelming and i really just want to ignore her but she wants to bring me down and its just so hurtful and annoying because this was my friend of 5 years and now shes just telling people stuff so shes not alone. How do i deal with it at school?
Toxic friend continued: Hi everyone so i... - Anxiety Support
Toxic friend continued
Hello 
What ever age , whatever you do in life you will always encounter these kind of people and the thing is you cannot change them as you are powerless over others but you can change yourself and how you react , how much control you allow them to have over you and so on
Ask yourself , who are they ?
Are they really that important ?
Eventually will you ever even see them again ?
Why are you giving them the power to make you miserable ?
The way they are going of do you really want people like that in your life ?
Even if they are going around spreading lies , you know the truth and anyone shallow enough to believe them well you don't need them in your life either !
How to get on at School , just ignore them , don't listen to the gossip if someone starts to tell you , say I don't want to know , that way if you don't listen to what they are saying they cannot hurt you
They will get fed up eventually and move on to someone else they always do but while they think you care they will keep it up , so sometimes as we say we have to fake it to make it , in other words pretend we don't care even if we do and the more you fake it in time you will actually not give a damn what they are saying
Take a step back from it all , you can keep your distance , you can tell others you don't want to know what is been said , the more you don't listen the easier it will get
We all have to go through these life experiences , I am not saying they are nice when we do because they certainly are not but we learn from them and they do make us stronger and ready to deal with the next chapter that life throws at us that might have some toxic people in it
Well done for what you have done so far to help yourself , keep going you will get through this and soon it will be History x
Thank u for the advice I guess im just worried that it might escalate and stuff if I don’t do anything about it like they really are judgmental u should hear the way they talk about people
It is more likely to escalate if you try to do something about it because you are giving them more ammunition
You cannot and won't change them , be the bigger person I know you will be and let them get on with it till they get fed up
Also I am a big believer in Karma which is what goes around comes around so bide your time and take on board they are not important x
I know your right but i feel like it still hurts because she was my best friend for 5 years we grew up together and it just sucks that shes just going around making petty digs at me and i feel like i miss the person she was not who she is now and i was blind she’s always been the one who wanted me as a sidekick snd stuff like that and in a way misses that she can’t control me and stuff. I feel like I don’t like change but my anxiety is also acting up which is making everything worse also thank u for the advice.
I know , was quite a few years ago I was young and I wished I knew what I knew now plus even when you are older these things still happen , it is life and yes it sucks and hurts but you have to learn to let go because if we don't the only person we are hurting is ourselves We have to try and not dwell on the past but look at the future and you will have a bright future , people will come and go in life and I think there is a reason at the time we just don't know why but we do move on and you will to , everytime this pops in your head tell yourself no I am not going to give her headspace rent free as I say she just is not worth it and focus on the positives in life which I am sure you have x
I know its just so hard to let go and i feel like im grieving that friendship and its harder to let go if that makes sense like these 5 years i was always 2nd to her snd this and that and I depended all of my emotions onto her which isn’t healthy but she took advantage of that but i still miss her
Maybe you are grieving for what you have lost and will have to go through it but you will come out the other end the best way is trying not to dwell on it and let it take over your every waking thought or it will take so much longer I have had friends come and go , no reason , felt used at times but we move on , it is life and it sucks as you say at times but we come through it happier as well most times x
Honestly im panicking now i think that she’s giving people my number because people I don’t usually speak to are texting me and im scared this happened like 2 times im messaged the guy haven’t got a response yet and i know but the whole thing just makes my anxiety ho haywire
I am not sure what more advice I can give you other than block the numbers and if it all starts getting to out of hand ask your parents and Teachers to give you some support as well as you can report it to the Police if you feel it is that bad or ignore them and wait for them to get fed up which they will x
I just know its rights to ignore her but what if it gets worse like what if something else worse happens and stuff what if they don’t get fed up
Sometimes things have to get worse before they get better and if they do and you can't cope you really need to tell your parents as you need their support x
Yeah i did tell a couple of people and it did help so thank you and it turns out that the number who texted me had my number saved from a long time ago and just got into contact with me
There you go , seems like you are letting this get to you to much , you need to let your parents support you through this you really do x
The thing is that my parents are traditional and I don’t feel like i can tell them about this whole thing if that makes sense but theres still feeling of doubt and i just doesn’t know what to do i know I should ignore them but im just worrying if its going to get worse
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