Sorry for long post! Need advice!

[Nebraskaman]

I don't know how to start this post, but here it goes. All my life since I can remember I've had some sort of anxiety and IBS. I struggled in school because anytime my stomach would hurt I'd miss school and then would be afraid to go back because I was the kid who was almost always absent the most. Quick childhood info Mom had or does have lupus never goes away. Dad left when I was 11. Ok jump forward ten years I'm bouncing from one job to another because I perform well I get promoted but leave cause I can't handle the pressure very long or don't like it anymore. Shortly after I find a job with manager I really like I also like the job, but not enough money, so I take a different job and end up failing due to being unhappy with the hours and atmosphere. Then I have my first ever panic attack and end up getting diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder that I can't get to go away, so I try antidepressants and Ativan. They seem to help some. I get lucky enough to get another job very similar to the one I did like, and actually make it to second in charge and stay for seven years. Last November I started having stomach issues again, I go threw all these tests, I lose 50 pounds. I freak out have panic attacks constantly can't go to work. I find out I have C-diff and am in early stages of an autoimmune disease with tests and family history. I've been home for 4 months and tried different medicines because I felt the ones I was on were possibly giving me depression. I sit here today depressed more than ever, crying almost on the daily my marriage worse than ever, and the thought of returning to work is unbearable at best.

[Amz1987]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, have you thought about seeing a naturopath? Could be helpful for you, hopefully talking on here or reading others experience that might be similar might help you to feel like you’re not alone in the struggle.

[Nebraskaman in reply to Amz1987]

I haven't heard about that before, I will check into that thank you so much!

[TheResilientOne]

Hey NebraskaMan, I’m sorry you are going through this! And I know it’s hard! Thank you for posting and getting out your thoughts.... if I can encourage you , take it one day at a time.... From what I gathered you’re trying really hard to work and get through the health problems. Please take it slow and allow your self to accept anxiety and health is a daily healing! You came to the right place because while you heal u will get to know others stories and be encouraged. Be gentle with your self You are strong and u will get through this!

[Nebraskaman in reply to TheResilientOne]

Thank you for the support! I'm finding the depression is possibly worse than the anxiety. I've been on Ativan for 6 years and my wife and new doctor think I should come off of it, and I want to as well except I feel like it's the only thing that is helping me.