Heads all over the place...: Hello all! Hope... - Anxiety Support

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Heads all over the place...

Cs131193 profile image
9 Replies

Hello all! Hope you’re all okay!

My head is all over the place at the moment. I’ve been having such a good couple of weeks, passed my driving test and just come back off of holiday so I’ve been on quite a high lately. Came back home 3 days ago and now I’ve come crashing back down, I realised today that the whole time I was on holiday I did all the chores still as it was a self catering holiday, whilst my partner relaxed, he deserves it since he works a lot and doesn’t often get time off work and we enjoyed the time we had together, but then we came home and I’ve still had to do everything whilst he relaxed. I work too, just part time hours but I feel as though that’s always thrown in my face as an excuse for why I have to be doing everything, which is fair enough if I work less hours and my partners full time at work then I understand that I should take care of the home whilst he’s at work. However, I work Saturdays and he doesn’t and I still have to come home and do everything while he has his feet up, but I feel like what I do at home is under appreciated especially when his family make remarks about a little bit of dust that has gathered over a couple of hours or one dish has been left on the side. I feel physically and mentally exhausted by trying to keep everyone happy and push through everyday. I don’t think any of them understand how draining it is for someone with anxiety to just do the simplest task, let alone face work everyday when I feel like I am literally crumbling inside. How can I explain to them how I’m feeling in a way they can understand? Every time I try to explain it I either can’t find the right words, seem like I’m just moaning about things or they just tell me to ‘get on with it like the rest of us’ or get put down by my partners family....any advice please?

Thank you!

Chloe 🙂

xx

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9 Replies

Your partner won't help you with anything?

Cs131193 profile image
Cs131193 in reply to

Jimmyjimmy, he does help, it’s just most of it he seems to believe is meant for me to do, I don’t know if I’m just been too sensitive on the matter or not 😕

in reply to Cs131193

A lot of men think like this, prob from what their parents taught them.

It's hard to know what to say in this situation to help you out.

Cs131193 profile image
Cs131193 in reply to

It’s the old fashioned ‘the woman’s place is in the home’ that my grandparents used to go by, it is a tough one 🤯

in reply to Cs131193

Yes that's exactly what it is...

If I think of anything I'll let you know..🤔

kenster1 profile image
kenster1

hi I don't really have the answers as im pretty much in a similar position.just back from holiday and it was me who done all the work cleaning the property making sure all was good.i work full time but every day I do cooking cleaning and helping out with the kids.it really does become draining.its not fare that your partner aint helping out I hope you find a way to tell him things have to change.as for his family that's a bit cruel of them to mention minute details of your houseold.something has to give to make it better lets hope it works out.

Cs131193 profile image
Cs131193 in reply to kenster1

I’ve had a bit of a talk with him about it and he seems to have taken it in to a degree but wether he really understands I don’t know. I think it’s the part with the parents that bug me most because it’s just plain rude to go into someone else’s home and act that way. They don’t seem to realise how much work goes into keeping a home, a job and coping with anxiety whilst fitting in time to yourself. His parents don’t work so they don’t understand it. Thank you! I hope it works out too 🙂 I hope you’re okay! 😊

19malpas profile image
19malpas

Hi I know how you feel, when my son & daughter come to c me thay criticize me also, when your boyfriend's relations come to c u just give them the duster & ask if thay would like to do it, it sounds nasty but it worked for me. Good luck. You need help not hindrance.

Cs131193 profile image
Cs131193 in reply to 19malpas

Thank you 19malpas!

It’s awful to be under scrutiny in your own home isn’t it!

Haha!!! That is a brilliant idea, I will try that next time 😊

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