GoodMorning Everyone.: sometimes i wish that... - Anxiety Support

Anxiety Support

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GoodMorning Everyone.

Johnnie1234 profile image
21 Replies

sometimes i wish that i wasnt suffering holding all the pain inside feeling like im going crazy in my mind when its not the intrusive thoughts its something else or talking to myself in my head like this is already over the limit sometimes i feel like im going to stay like this for the rest of my life i wake up always negative feelings i wish it could all change and feel like the old me i never thought i would be going through this espically coming from my head like if im going crazy everyday i get the nervous feeling in my stomach and also when i look at myself in the mirror is like my eyesbrows is up like if im worried and dont know it . i didnt think your mind is so strong and didnt think it would try to control everything my head sometimes feel funny the thoughts come super fast and start racing my thoughts i keep this in tell nobody but people in here people think im living my best life they say to me hey johnnie i wanna be like you always doing you and being happy when they got it all wrong and mistaken . i need something that can clear my mind and could beat this thing to never have it again and get my mind back on track and live life for real and actually tell people yes im happy and im living my best life . I hope everyone is having a good morning

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Johnnie1234 profile image
Johnnie1234
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21 Replies
RainneLim profile image
RainneLim

Hi Johnnie. My name is Rainne. I get it. Everyone tells me how lucky I am with my job, how flexible it is, how close it is from home and how well paid I am for just starting off.I always seem happy and bubbly, always smiling and trying to make everyone laugh.

What they don't know is that every morning, I wake up at 5:30 am from anxiety, only to get up 3 hours later but get an anxiety attack again. To get to work, where I am always worried I will make a mistake and can no longer ask for help cause when I do, I am criticized and looked down upon. I get home exhausted, wanting to sleep, but I don't so I clean, read or go for a walk to clear my mind. I starve myself until my stomach yells for food. I eat late and am exhausted. But depression hits and I cannot sleep. I sleep at 2 am only to repeat my day at 5:30 am. Though my day always starts worrisome, it is a good morning because I got up, got ready and taking one step at a time.

Whatever is causing your anxiety, take it one step at a time. Talk to me whenever you need someone to listen to. I am here.

Johnnie1234 profile image
Johnnie1234 in reply to RainneLim

This horrible i barely get hungry when i use to eat alot hopefully we do recover

Maagaa profile image
Maagaa in reply to Johnnie1234

No work it’s Tuesday? Working keeps the mind and body healthy and productive

Johnnie1234 profile image
Johnnie1234 in reply to Maagaa

yeah i worked at 3am and got out this morning

RainneLim profile image
RainneLim in reply to Johnnie1234

Yes. My fridge is usually empty cause I barely eat now. I, too, ate a lot because I worked out a lot. Now I don't even work out anymore. No motivation really. But trying to find something to get my blood pumping. Someway or another, we have to do something. I am going to try kickboxing soon.

My roomie who is going through a hard time too and does kickboxing, and she loves it. I can tell it is helping her cause she seems more optimistic. I recommend doing it to. I am not fit anymore. I am a tiny little woman who can't even go up down 2 flights of stairs without breathing heavily. Highly recommend! Let's try it out. See if the blood pumping gets all the negative out through sweating. LOL

Johnnie1234 profile image
Johnnie1234 in reply to RainneLim

yeah you right we soon will get better and we will look at these post and tell people what we went through one day we could beat this hopefully

gggg123 profile image
gggg123

You need to change the record, it's the same everyday !!

Johnnie1234 profile image
Johnnie1234 in reply to gggg123

yeah it is

Mariapalmer profile image
Mariapalmer

You really need to start helping yourself and push forward because you say the same thing almost everyday and your just winding yourself up.

Johnnie1234 profile image
Johnnie1234 in reply to Mariapalmer

ok because i never experinced it before thats why im saying the samething of course something thats wrong with you gonna keep wanna talk about it . to find a solution of course so .

Mariapalmer profile image
Mariapalmer in reply to Johnnie1234

Yeah and people have heard and given you advice and your repeating word for word, there is no sudden solution or switch off nobody can take this away for you no matter how many times you type it out

Johnnie1234 profile image
Johnnie1234 in reply to Mariapalmer

yea you are right but thanks for the negativity.

Mariapalmer profile image
Mariapalmer in reply to Johnnie1234

Im just being honest because it’s not helping you , take down and try follow the advice , make sure you go and see a therapist maybe look at medication if it’s really unbearable for you but no worries ✌️

Indigojoe profile image
Indigojoe in reply to Johnnie1234

Dear johnnie,

this entire forum has held your "hand" and showed you infinite patience, month after month after month, of which you deserved, as we all do.

You get the most replies to your posts as almost anybody.

All of the time, too.

WE are only KEYBOARD warriors, out in cyberspace, repeating to you what we have learned from our journey.

Sitting behind a computer screen or PSII, you do not have our eye contact, or a pat on the back, or the SOUND of our voice to complete the experience of relationships.

You read our words with YOUR voice.

Truth is I think we have ALL learned from the replies on your site and we thank you for that...............

May I suggest that It is time for you to develop personal relationships with people in your area.

90% of what you post, 90%!!!! is normal "growing pains" that most kids go through.

Usually there is a person, like a friend, uncle, cousin, neighbor, or teacher who says, " heck ya, I think about that too, it's no big deal, OR " I think about those things sometimes too............my mom says' everybody does and it will be better later tonight. etc"

You told us that the other night you went out to a club and had a great time.

Your anxiety and scary thoughts were gone.

That was a breakthrough moment for you, and for us to see you connect the dots that night.

However, within hours you dug deep to find something to be upset about. Instead of having INSIGHT, into yourself of that experience at the club, you came back online, and replayed, the "ain't it awful", tape in your head as tho, it was a new development.

If you choose to find people to talk to, in person, you will see that there is nothing out of the ordinary about what you think, based on how you are choosing to live your life.

I got the courage to share with you, " parental " advice from afar, based on the fact that Mariapalmer gave you TRUE and honest advice. That is a very good cyber-friend!

Will you take to heart, that you must get out from behind the computer and engage in person to person experiences?

No matter what we write, it is your voice you read it with, so talking in person to another WILL HELP you re- frame how and what you think about.

You are free to fly ! We have taught you well.

Indigojoe

Samzz25 profile image
Samzz25

I've dealt with this same thing, do you have anyone to share what exactly it is you think, the thoughts that come up? Would you share them with us, here?

Johnnie1234 profile image
Johnnie1234 in reply to Samzz25

you went through it ? and its like bad thoughts like looking at buildings like my mind telling go jump but i wont do it thats crazy everything i look thats high gives me a fear because of those thoughts bad thoughts comes out of no where everday racing thoughts head feeling wired and feeling down also its like it wont leave.

Maagaa profile image
Maagaa

What ever happened to the therapy.? You also said I was being negative, now your are saying Maria is being negative. You must understand these people are trying to help but you are playing the same song and it gets old, if I recall a few forum members suggested Claire Weekes and several other things. We have all been there but pulled our selfs up by the boot straps got it together and are moving forward. This will be my final post to you wish you good health.

Delzek profile image
Delzek

Johnnie we have different real lives than what we try to show in real life! You ask three of your friends how you appear to them and not one will be the same and they certainly won't be what we think we portray ourselves as! I have given up pretending to be ok, or trying to let friends and family think I am coping well, it's a waste of time because at the end of the day the only person who we are fooling is ourselves! Try and have a good day!

Delzek profile image
Delzek

It seems some are getting tired of hearing the same thing Johnnie but don't worry I understand where you are coming from, it's hard to explain to other people what is ailing you, and negativity never helps! Just take small steps one foot in front of the other! Work out what it is that's causing your thoughts find someone is a Dr or counsellor to talk to that will help you! It doesn't matter how many times you repeat yourself on this site as long as you are not just using the site for some sort of wind up (it's happened before) sometimes you have to repeat yourself just to be understood!

Johnnie1234 profile image
Johnnie1234 in reply to Delzek

yeah espically when you never had a thing before you were always good before it happend my happen after a bad panick attack with smoking weed about a year and a half ago after that had all types physical sympthoms like if it was sending me signals i got use to all that then now about three weeks ago or so i got the bad thoughts everyday for no reason .

Shazzzz1 profile image
Shazzzz1

Sending much love darlin, I'm sorry you've been cursed too. :( I have it too. I'm happy to talk to you about it addd my snap of you have it shannonmegaw1 I talk to lots of different people with the same thing n I'm a listener with a crisis line. 💕 stay strong. N hopefully we can chat more

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