Extreme Fear of Death

[GMason]

I have severely chronic and extreme fear of death which has resulted in me having a life that is ruled completely by anxiety, does anyone else have this issue or possibly have advice on how to overcome it? Thanks.

[Cat33]

So sorry that you have this horrible fear and that it is ruling your life I recently did a mindfulness course and that teaches you to live in the moment and not look ahead or catatstrophise about things I worry about dying only because I'm in my mid 60s and hate getting older but have to say since I did the course I don't think about it anymore

I hope this helps and you don't think I'm making light of your problem by suggesting a course will solve all your worries but I definitely think it would ease it a bit

There are lovely videos on YouTube for relaxation and over thinking and also self help ones for your fear

Wishing you all the best and peace in your life

[GMason in reply to Cat33]

Hey thanks that's really interesting, can I ask what exercises do you do that help you with this fear?

[Cat33 in reply to GMason]

Well it's very much concentrating on the moment what you are doing like eating you think about the taste analyse it Think about your body do a scan starting at your feet work your way up Concentrate on your breathing look at things around you describe them to yourself look for the good things Don't look back or to the future Think of the feel and smell of things I hope I'm not sounding like a crazy lady 😊

My son had a serious accident 3 weeks ago and they told us to prepare for life changing injuries now before I did the course and practiced it each day I wouldn't have coped the way I have I don't look ahead at all I take one day at a time I see the progress he has made and I'm letting the future take care of itself we shall cross that bridge when we come to it I used to get depressed and worry I don't now

The DARE response by Barry McDonagh is a fantastic book for life changing words cannot recommend it highly enough

Mindfulness stops worry and is fabulous I hope you can research it and maybe find a course They are great books on it too

Good luck

[GMason in reply to Cat33]

Thanks very much for the advice I guess being present in the moment is the freedom from oppressive thoughts, when we live now fear can't effect is? I find it really hard to stay present, any tips how to be now?

[Cat33 in reply to GMason]

Hello KiityJump

I was just reading all your replies I'm so glad people have responded to you as this is obviously so distressing to you I was thrilled to see Geoff replied he talks so much sense and I noticed he recommends Claire Weekes she is absolutely fantastic her book has been my Bible over the years if you follow her advice I guarantee you will rid yourself of this awful worry and enjoy life again

Mindfulness has to be practiced every day but it's a pleasurable thing to do just concentrate on your breathing don't change or force it Listen to sounds around you describe them to yourself Taste food describe that Distract yourself as much as possible it will be hard at first but it will take over

Try and do relaxation techniques as often as you can too they will help you so much

You will rid yourself of this and be free just take baby steps and also keep a diary you might surprise yourself at just how well you are doing

Take lots of care xxx

[seaShelly in reply to Cat33]

Thanks for your info it really helped me too! 👍😁

[Cat33 in reply to seaShelly]

Oh that's good When you break it down it's all anxiety we all have something that sets off the panic Geoff's reply is wonderful and Claire Weekes is the best help ever xx

[SA192461]

I suffer from this too..I’ve been trying mindfulness & meditation myself..It seemed to be helping me but now, not so much. I’m truly sorry that you live with this as I know very well how you feel..sending Hugs and much support to you.

[GMason in reply to SA192461]

Thanks did these methods help you move away from it previously? Why do you think they fell down?

[SA192461 in reply to GMason]

For me, it depends on what's going on in my life. My life is in turmoil right now and everything is magnified because of it. I will continue to Meditate and hope and pray it helps me again. All we can do is try are best.

[kevoreally in reply to SA192461]

I suggest meditating a little longer than you usually do as we build a tolreance for everything maybe you have built one for the time frame of meditating

[kimmy1286]

I have this and at one point I had it so bad I wouldn't walk around for fear I would die of a heart attack lol stupid I know but there was a lot more going on in my life that brought this about. I would ask yourself if there is something more stressful going on? I was also agoraphobic so not sure if this played a part as well.

The way I have got rid of it on the most part is to have like another mindset and it's locked away in there! sadly I really don't know how to describe it! ox

[GMason in reply to kimmy1286]

That's interesting can I ask what type of mindset that is? It would be really helpful as I would like to develop that too

[kimmy1286 in reply to GMason]

Sorry I only seen this just now I hope your better the only way I could discribe it as is sorta looking the other way in my head lol its there the fears but its like its a quarter there as I ignore it a good thing I learned is to look around at your surroundings and count things look at colors etc. X

[Icanbeathis2016]

Yes. I too have this same fear. Has completely to over my life for the worst. Im afraid fir my health. I cant sleep. And when my anxiety is high I cant eat. I just had a harsh hit if reality that as much as I dont want something to happen, I cannot stop it even if I begged, cried, and tried. But yes my fear is still there.

[GMason in reply to Icanbeathis2016]

Sorry to hear that, are there times that the fear is much less?

[Jeff1943]

Kittyjump, your fear of imminent death is quite a common symptom of anxiety disorder and I've explained why this is to several people here so forgive me if I've already told you this before.

We acquire anxiety disorder when our nervous system can't take any more stress, worry, overwork, disappointment, grief, you know, all the things that bring us anxiety in the first place.

Our nerves become over sensitive as a result and in this state they exaggerate and magnify all our small normal concerns into major life-threatening worries.

Indigestion becomes a heart attack, a mild stomach ache becomes cancer and headaches become tumours.

Scans and tests that show nothing is wrong bring some reassurance but before long people become convinced that the doctor has missed something and the obsession continues.

The fear of imminant death is just another example of this process. Everybody has a natural concern not to die before their time but this can become magnified out of all proportion by nerves kept in an over sensitive state due to being constantly flooded by fear hormones.

Thus the normal instinct for self survival becomes exaggerated into a sense of impending doom and death.

As with all the symptoms of general anxiety disorder, health anxiety and social anxiety recovery lies in healing the cause rather than the symptom. People rarely seem to respond to logical persuasion that the feeling of doom is completely unjustified.

So rather than trying to cure an illness you don't have it's better to focus on curing the illness you do have: health anxiety caused by an over sensitised nervous system. Because when you're successful in allowing your nerves to recover all the fake symptoms yield and trouble you no more. And that includes the illogical obsession that we are about to die.

There are many ways of recovering from anxiety without medications - but the one I'm familiar with is the Acceptance method advocated by the late Doctor Claire Weekes in her first book 'Self help for yor nerves'.

[GMason in reply to Jeff1943]

That is all very interesting, thanks for that I'm definitely going to check out that book, do you have an overview of the concept behind what she teaches? I'm just a basic idea, i will get it

[Jeff1943 in reply to GMason]

Well, the overview is that by accepting the symptoms of anxiety for the time being we learn to generate less fear and less fear hormones allowing our over sensitive nervous system to recover and when that happens we return to feeling normal. Btw if you live in the U.S. that same book is titled 'Hope and help for your nerves' both available from Amazon.

Between them, all Claire Weekes' books have received 1,750 reader reviews in recent years on amazon.co.uk and amazon.com combined. 90% rate her method Very Good or Excellent. Not bad considering she died about 25 years ago.

[seaShelly in reply to Jeff1943]

I identify with a lot of that. Thanks for sharing. Really helped me understand my brain better.

[CaptainCrunch]

I hate that you are dealing with this but I can definitely relate. Seems like a lot of good replies already. There is a verse from the Bible I really have to learn to live by... and it is to, “Be Still.” Learning to let go of control is very freeing but really hard to do and takes lots of time and practice so NEVER be hard on yourself. Please keep posting.

[GMason in reply to CaptainCrunch]

Thanks I agree letting go is liberating, do you have any methods that help you do it?

[CaptainCrunch in reply to GMason]

I wish I could give you the magic bullet. I have done lots of things that have helped. Walks. Looking at tree tops. Smelling delightful thing. Thinking about all my 5 senses. Listening. Focusing my eyes on an object and really studying it.

But also journaling and writing out your prayers and thoughts. This helps me feel as though I have given the worries and concerns over to my Creator.

I also make lists... “what every is good and positive dwell on these things.” Think of my children, think of others, think of ways I can help and show love to others. On and on. I hope some of this help. Please keep posting and communicating.

[Leah36]

I can totally relate. I suffer from this every day of my life. I am on medication, but I feel like it's not helping anymore. I have such a bad fear of death that if I read about someone dying from heart attack or something of that nature, I freak out and my anxiety and ocd with thinking about it goes into super high mode. It's awful.

[seaShelly]

Yep I had this same feeling. I still worry about certain things but not quite as much as before. The main thing that helped me was going on Lexapro. I'm on a children's dose because i really don't want to be overly reliant on medicine or have side effects etc.

Anyway - I was having constant panic attacks that I was suffocating or having a heart attack. I spent thousands of dollars on ER visits as I felt each episode was "really really for real this time!" I even started to know several of the hospital employees by name. And sometimes I'd curb it by not going into the hospital but I would drive there and sit in the car parking lot by the ER. Or on a bench by the door. (If you sit in the waiting room for too long they require you to check in or leave).

I also had a huge fear of some specific things which I won't explain as I think anxiety sufferers can start worrying about other things once someone brings it up lol lol.

Finally I accepted taking an ssri at the lowest dose possible. Within a week a lot of my fears suddenly disappeared. Or something would trigger me and I'd just be able to say to myself "oh this isn't real. It's anxiety thinking. "

Again I still have some issues but the 5mg Lexapro has been a big difference, I hope this helps. 😊

[Gambit62]

this post might give you some ideas

healthunlocked.com/couchtob...

[Gillybabe]

I used to suffer with this and anxiety. It was only when I became a Christian and handed my life over to Christ the fear subsided. I used to be frightened of just collapsing and dying but once I asked Jesus into my situation I felt he then walked through it with me and if the worst happened I would just be with him. If ever I got frightened I would say "Jesus help me". Hope this helps.

[Tonyhope]

Yes, I think about death every single day,an too be honest,its draining me, I really do need help myself but it's only in our own heads

[Thkdiffgirl]

When I get high anxiety, I too fear death. My parents died young , so it always made me afraid. But now , I try to be mindful, in the now. All we have is the present nothing else is guranteed . Try hard to live in the present and you will recognize how much beauty there is in the world. Dont let anxiety beat you, or me lol...I found a book, the Power of Now, by Eckhart Tolle, really really helps when my mind drifts back to anxiety. Good luck! 😃

[Moon_Glitter]

When I was twenty three, I had an ectopic pregnancy, that ruptured.. i died in the ambulance. I was brought back and had emergency surgery. I died again. Was brought back. Everyone involved kept saying to me that me surviving was a miracle.

My point is it was ok. It was better than ok. I had no fear, no pain and was completely calm and happy. I know the fear of death is common for practically everyone. But you don't have to be afraid.

[Hidden]

Yes I’ve dealt with this fear and sometimes still do. It what is weird is I almost have died twice already and my panic and anxiety disorder are the hardest things I have ever dealt with. There’s a book I read where a woman had an NDE from end stage lymphoma and came back from it and completely healed. She actually is so bold as to say that death is an amazing experience. Pretty wild huh??she doesn’t have a bit of cancer in her body now she says the key to being happy is learning to love ourselves. Her name is Anita Moorjani and she has several books out and they are making a movie about her story. I can’t wait to see it!!

[Icanbeathis2016]

Hello to you again. I hope it's been a better 9 months for you since you posted this. I still from time to time reread posts on the forum when I go through my rough times. I'd like to share with you my new broadcast endeavor. It's for those who share the same struggles and fears. If you have the chance, check it out. 😊

I wish us the best.

youtu.be/kReK2k5cSCw(Not working as expected?)

[anxiousgirl7]

I have this. Feel free to message me