Does it every get better?

[kama24]

I haven't posted in a while. Not sure I even want to put it to type! I had my appointment with the endocrinologist & was sent for a special blood test by him. Our family dr. felt my cortisol was high and could be causing the anxiety in the morning. He thought the CAT scan and ultra sound showed a nodule or mass. Specialist says no....and blood test was find. Thank you and good by. Mornings are horrible with the feeling of fear and shaking. I do try everything to get control, believe me I'm well educated on my issues. Then last Fri. while in a restaurant I had an "episode". I felt sick for a moment, I remember our daughter asking if she could take me to the washroom...then everything happened. My family's voices seemed far away in the distance, I didn't feel strong enough to talk. I am told my hands and arms went limp and hung down and I started to slide off my chair under the table. My husband jumped up and pulled me back up. The waitress brought ice water. After abut 5 min. I could talk and hear normally and my husband and son in law got me out to the car. I talked to our family dr. yesterday and like many others he said ....a TIA. I know I should not have googled, it just confirmed what I knew. A TIA can lead to a big stroke or heart attack. My FEAR is now out of control! Our dr. put me on a daily blood thinner, and I already day 30 mg of Crestor a week. I go to see him next week. I dread the thought of a brain MRI, especially if there is dye or any injection. I am highly allergic to contrast dye and cannot tolerate it but afraid if the meds they give you to stop the reaction will not help and I will again be covered inside and out with hives. I'm sorry for the long rant. I don't really have anyone to talk to that understands why my mind goes to the place of "fear". Has anyone else had a MRI of the brain? Did you have dye? Thank you for listening.

[Lifeless100]

Life, death and the time between feeling like you do...like I do and have so many times. This game of anxiety is a tricky one. It is surely an ample opponent but does it always win? Will it always be this way? the answer is no. There will be good mornings again...you will learn to cherish them and live inside those incredible anxiety free moments.

[kama24 in reply to Lifeless100]

Thank you so much for your kind words.