I skipped my walk today because I wanted to come home and do deep cleaning. Which I was able to do. My morning was good and by good I mean I been able to ignore the feelings of unreality or shutting down any weird thoughts about reality that my brain wants to obsess over. Now it's noon and I'm trying to relax but my body is just pumping with adreleline fear/panic/anxiety which make my depersonalization/ derealization symptoms REALLY BAD. I know people say to ignore but it's so flipping hard. I just want to run. Like literally. It makes me want to run and scream. I am praying for better days. I just made an appointment with a holistic doctor but she can't see me until June. I figure let me go a more natural route since these heavy duty medications I keep trying aren't working. I'm willing to try anything to get my life back.
I hope everyone is having a wayyy better day than me.