This sucks!

Sucks that I had so many good days and today I feel lost again. I'm here crying for no reason. Feeling like I'm never going to get back to the way I was before this nightmare started. Body full of anxiety and panic for no reason. I just sometimes don't get this at all. I just don't know how people can deal with this depersonalization/ derealization. It is horrific. How can the brain do this to anyone to try to protect them? It's terrifying!!! I guess sometimes is good to cry. I don't know. The scariest thing is fear of nothing. I feel this fear all over me and this rush vibrations in my legs that make me want to run. Then I feel unreal. Fake feeling it's so weird. I am trying so hard to keep telling myself that this is anxiety. But it's VERY HARD


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8 Replies

  • It really IS good to cry sometimes!! It helps your body and mind "throw away" some of your pent up negative emotions. Embrace it and let it cleanse you... then get back up and keep going. You can do it!!

  • You're doing great, Cat. Accept the healing process as something that takes time and you'll have great weeks and you'll have bad days here and there. It's all part of the process. Last night, I was pretty dizzy but I got myself real excited and happy. I faked myself into loving the feeling of the dizziness and it went away. First time ever that I've really just went out to be joyful about it, and it just went away. You've been such an inspiration to lots of people here and you continue to be. You'll pull through and come out on top. You're not slipping back down in the hole, you're on your way up and out.

  • Thank You! Everyone here including you have been a lot a help. I was a hot mess a few weeks ago and I really hate that I am back to whining. This is just the worse thing that could have happened to me as an adult.

  • You got this I got this we all got this!!!! We can beat anything because we are a stronger bunch of people that's why God gave it to us he knows we will overcome whatever is giving to us.. Does it suck ? hell ya almost everyday but ill take the good with the bad as long as I'm on this side of the dirt I'll keep fighting and so will you....

  • I understand how your feeling, I've been feeling that way all weekend. It sucks. Part of me knows it's the anxiety, stress, junk.... but there are times its hard to get the brain to fully understand that. I'm very grateful for this group, it makes me feel less alone & that what I feel isn't as crazy as I think. We are are here for your good times, but more importantly when the days aren't so good. We will get past this. 💛

  • Thank You. I am extreamtly greatful for this site and people. A few weeks ago I was a mess. I remember being so desperate searching for someone to understand since when you explain this to people they think you are going insane. I really do try very hard to train my brain to being normal again and I had some really good days. So good that my phycologist wants to see me in 2 weeks instead of 1. And then I have days like today. It actually started last night. Seems to be every afternoon but today I was on edge since morning. Hate waking up every morning and the first thought is " am I normal today" I don't like that weird unreality feeling and I keep mentioning it because it is truly the most terrifying disturbing feeling for me. I don't even care about the racing heart or the other symptoms. I just don't know how I could have built some much anxiety inside me without noticing. I was truly a happy person 2 months ago. This hit me out of nowhere. I keep wondering if maybe I should go and socially more. I don't have many friend here so my life revolves around my kids and husband. I far from my hometown where my friends and family are. Maybe meeting people and socializing will snap me back to reality. Who knows. I hope we get better soon.

  • You were doing so well I'm sorry you feeling bad again, I can't seem to have 2 days in a row that I feel good.I have ovarian cysts that hit me this weekend after working on my deck trying to get everything ready for summer. I don't know what to do anymore.

  • Oh man I'm sorry I had those because and they suck but mine went away without any surgery. Is your doctor playing the waiting game? I hope you feel better soon but for now maybe you can take Motrin since is anti inflammatory?

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