I am so sad that I don't look forward to anything. I only look forward to facing whatever with anxiety and having to just get through it. I wish I could feel excited about going on vacation or anywhere away from home! I dread it. We will be traveling for Christmas and I am already bracing myself for the faking it all week as I drag around my anxiety and depression with a big ole' fake smile on my face. I am so blessed. WTF can't I be happy and excited and NOT worry. Oh, I so wish I had good anticipation instead of bad. Anyone been dealt with this and been able to change it?