Self esteem

Does anyone suffer very low self esteem as well. I have had low self esteem since I was at secondary day school. I went to a private school along with other reasonably intelligent people and was made to feel thick by staff and pupils when I was not a straight A student. The problem with my current degree is it is vocational so I do so many weeks in uni and so many weeks in practice. At the end of each practice block my tutor comes in for a meeting with my mentor and I. All this being under the microscope and having feedback about where I can improve is actually not good for me as my low self esteem feels like it has been given a real kicking. I have to work hard to get through this and there are many tears at home. my self esteem is about as low as it can get now but still I continue. I am seeing the gp next week and waiting for counselling to deal with all my anxiety, depression and low self esteem. How do other people with low self esteem deal with situations where being judged is part of the job/course?

5 Replies

  • Can you tell your tutor you suffer from low self esteem and that you work better in a positive environment.

  • I fear she may think it is an excuse to not have negative feedback, but maybe that is just me again. she has given very negative feedback this time and I dread going into work. I think my practice changes when she walks in the room because I get anxious about being watched (I have told her this) but she has to watch me and give feedback. she has said I should stop trying to impress her but still I am anxious about it. I am going to speak to her tonight to politely say I feel I have been misjudged and when she is not in the room my practice is second to none. I need to stick up for myself more - something I have never been able to do. usually if I feel something is wrong I go into myself and let it continueand I should be shouting stop! Dealing with people that give me positive feedback to my face but negative feedback to my tutor is another issue.

  • I read your post and it's very clear that you are very intelligent and articulate, and you are going to uni which absolutely confirms these facts. So congratulations on your life so far.. now, you mustn't let the people who were mean to you because they didn't know any better (at school, in the past) have any influence on your future.

    The future is not written,it is for you to make, and they have no bearing on what you do now, but you are letting those influences stop you from growing.

    may be your tutor is looking to find a point where you will push back, draw a line in the sand, stand up for what you really believe in and show that you're here to live your life and have a lot to offer, which I'm certain you do.

    Nobody likes negative feedback, but it would appear to be a necessary evil of the education system, and it is just that; a temporary thing that is applied to one piece of work, a word or sentence, or something you did for a minute not your whole life. It's time to start standing up and being positive, stand up and be counted this is not a rehearsal, and looking from the outside and you are doing just great ! keep up the good work and start believing in yourself.

    good luck take care

  • Thank you. I have just come in from a 12.5 hr nightshift so will respond properly tomorrow afternoon - time for bed zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  • I need to stand up and push back - stand up for myself. Hubby gets annoyed that I don't because he is never scared to speak his mind. I have began the process by emailing my tutor to say that I am happy to receive negative feedback as I am a student and still learning but I am being made to feel less confident. I have had a fabulous night shift working with someone else and came home feeling 6 foot tall. I need to find some balls now and continue to advocate for myself (I am always doing it for others and have had many uncomfortable conversations with school about their treatment of my sons so why not do the same for myself). Easy to say now or in emails but I need to do it face to face. if I can deal with my lack of confidence and self esteem then I can reduce my anxiety. small steps first but I am going to try.

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