PLEASE MAKE IT GO AWAY

[smjtty]

THE INNER PEACE OF RELAXING AND KNOWING WHO IM IS GONE

I FIGHT A NEVER ENDING BATTLE WITH MY SELF WHO I HAVE

BECOME I WANT TO FORGET HOW I LOOK BUT WHEN I LOOK

AT MY SELF I CAN NOT BELIVE I WANT THIS PERSON TO

DISAPEAR SHE LOOKS SO RAGGED AND UNHEALTHY PLEASE

I ASK GO AWAY GO AWAY I CAN NOT LOOK AT HER ANY MORE

I CAN NOT I WAKE UP AND IT IS HER AGAIN AND AGAIN

I MISS THE PERSON I WAS I CAN NOT FIGHT THIS BATTLE

PLEASE MAKE IT DISAPEAR I CAN NOT TAKE IT ANY MORE

YOU WOULD ONLY KNOW IF YOU WERE IN MY SHOES

MY DEAR

[Agora1]

Hi Smjtty, you are right in that we would only know your heartbreak if we were in your shoes. Each time you write I learn more and more how deep this pain of yours goes. It is a never ending battle until the day you can accept what has happened. I think we all miss who we were at one time whether it was in our prime or before an illness or accident. Life changes us sometimes not always in a good way. Our exterior presence should take a back seat and who we have become by life's experience needs to take over. This is who we are now and nothing can change that. We are who we are and if others can't accept you for that, then they are not worthy of you. Smjtty, I think you have a lot to offer this world. You have a brilliant way of expressing your sorrow. You should write a book. Thank you for coming on and sharing. I feel for you my dear. Sending you a hug from the heart. x

[smjtty in reply to Agora1]

THANK U MY FRIEND I WISH I COULD WRIGHT A BOOK

SOME ONE WOULD READ

[Agora1 in reply to smjtty]

I would buy it in a heartbeat Smjtty. You are talented and words seem to flow for you so I don't think writing the book would be as hard as getting it published. (but everyone goes through that) You could get it onto Amazon and Barnes & Noble. I've always wanted to write a book especially during the years of being agoraphobic. Not so much for the money, because I doubt the average person wouldn't make that much. Mostly for the satisfaction and accomplishment of saying "I am a writer, I have a published book". If you ever start writing, let me know. Smjtty, take care of yourself. x

[smjtty in reply to Agora1]

THANK U

[AileenT in reply to smjtty]

I wrote a reply, & it vanished!

SO sorry, too tired to re-write,

You CAN write the book. Really.

[Worried111]

Hi i can relate to everything you say as i too feel like i have lost myself,somewhere on this long road of anxiety,i struggle with my identity,and question myself how on earth i got in this unhealthy mental state,it creeps up on you yet all the time you can feel it changing your personality,stripping away the few happy feelings you have left,takes away your confidence,takes away your inner strength,all we can do is work with what we have ,we must learn to love ourselves again from the inside,and stop punishing ourselves with dark thoughts,you must look in the mirror and say i will be mentally stronger,i will be healthier,i am me ,i am as important as the next person,i deserve to be well and feel good,the hardest part is believing in yourself,i wish you inner peace

[smjtty in reply to Worried111]

THANK U