Depression and anxiety

[Icanbeathis2016]

Well I'm writing away today. My feelings are all over the place. After losing a lot of weight mainly from being stressed and mild depression and my anxiety, i lost my appetite, had to force myself to eat. I've lost 20 pounds in 3 months unintentional. I've never been so heartbroken. And it seems like every time someone who sees me that knew how I use to look I'm afraid to hear what they will say. It's like ever time someone make a comment saying, "you look so skinny. You lost so much weight. Or, what happened"? It takes a piece of my heart. It rips me apart. To a point some times I get sad looking at myslef. 😢 I cry and pray so much because I realized when I was a little bigger and I use to want to work out to lose weight so bad and I use to complain about my weight and my thighs and my stomach and there was nothing wrong with my size. I was beautiful the way I was but yet I wanted to lose weight and have a look that was ideal for tv. And all along I didn't appreciate how beautiful I already was. And when I look at pictures from before I cry more because I say wow I actually did look beautiful and I can't believe I complained. God please forgive me for being ungreatful. And now look at me. All I can say is be careful what you wish for. God I'm sorry😢