i feel as if my brain is becoming more and more 'stupid.' like i cannot concentrate on words or take in sentences sometimes like my brain is forcing me to blank out everything and i feel that i may be developing a brain disease or tumour or that i will become severely mentally disabled and not be able to function or use my motor skills. i am so terrified, i have moments like these a lot but right now it is extremely bad, i have bad short term memory like i won't be able to remember what i did a couple days ago or weeks ago I just feel as if I am slowly losing my mind. (I'm only 19)
Does anyone else with anxiety/depression have these episodes/symptoms? are they even related to anxiety/depression? I am absolutely petrified that I will lose all my memory or end up being disabled.
even when i read over what i just wrote i couldn't understand/take it in like my brain is blind or something??? please tell me this is not a sign of an even more damaging mental illness?
I don't know if I can go through this anymore and I have had 5 psychotic episodes, I just do not know how long I can survive on this planet. If it is going to be like this for most of my life then I do not want to be here. But I could never leave my loved ones behind. I feel like I am going to be stuck in this hell until I eventually die.