Keeping Doctor Appointments

I have been noticing that everyone seems to be able to see their doctors

without a problem short of worrying about the outcome. Even if I had

someone to come with me, being agoraphobic as well as not believing

in the doctors anymore keeps me from taking care of myself. I get so

upset in just thinking of setting up an appointment that my b/p shoots

up unbelievably and I start crying and shaking and that's before leaving.

When I have, on occasion, gotten to a doctor's office, I'm dizzyheaded,

shaking and whimpering. It's pretty sad. I feel embarrassed to act like

this but I can't help it. How do you all do it?

39 Replies

  • I miss a lot of doctor's appointments. When I go, I always take someone with me. I also tell the doctor that I'm very anxious. That instantly calms me down.

  • Hi. I am sorry that you suffer in this way - it must be very distressing for you. I wonder what help the doctors have offered you. Therapy for example, or some medication to help calm you. Phobias are only addressed properly by some kind of therapy. Can the doctor not visit you sometimes? If getting outside was part of a therapy plan to help you then fine. But sounds like not much is going on in that area. Maybe you can ask the doctor about therapy?

  • Dear Person,

    I agree that it is essential that you go to the doctors with someone else. If thee is really no-one whom you know locally who can do this for you, try a local volunteers group, or church or other faith community. Check that the individual had DBS clearance first, though.

    It is possible to access medical information by contacting 111, but, as I discovered last evening, they are too timid to say much that is useful.

    Best Wishes,


  • Thank you!

  • If you live in the UK I would suggest you telephone Social Services and tell them your problem. They may arrange a visit and put you in touch with someone who can help you, even maybe arrange for someone to accompany you to your GP and explain how agoraphobic you are and also arrange for some sort of counselling for you. As Pearwug says, 111 are only good if you are so ill, you need an ambulance and they phone the hospital before your arrival so you are seen quicker. Anything else, they just advise you on medical matters and usually tell you to see your GP.

  • Thank you!

  • It is so hard I'm thinking of changing to closer to me cud u do that

  • Thank you!

  • I am so scared right now and crying that I can't even figure out how to send my thanks to all of you for caring. I have a blood test appointment in a few hours (not afraid of the blood test) but of going out. It's terrible to be this way. I wake up shaking and crying and nothing works for me anyone. It's been too many years of trial and error that my mind has formed this behavior that I can't shake. I'm sorry.....

  • No need to be sorry it's just the thoughts don't listen to them say I can and I will let me know how you get on we're all rite ther with u luv xx

  • Ok, I'm back from the doctor's office. I'm anxious whether in the house or out so I might as well keep my appointment. It's definitely anticipatory anxiety that I am feeling because I was personable when I got there but as I was walking out to the car I started thinking about the "what ifs" which produces the feeling that I'm not really there.

    As I was driving home, I had to stop at the post office and get a letter weighed so I had to go inside and was fine. I then went to a card shop

    after that and browsed around for 20 minutes. Had you told me that I could do 3 things in one afternoon, I would have said no. It's strange

    how strong the mind can be to control our actions. Thanks to all of you for caring. That's what we do best for each other :)

  • Well done u have to be so proud of urself I mite need encouragement tmoro think of me xx

  • Of course, let me know what I can do to support you.

  • My little one singing at a Christmas fayre so a lot of people and questions about y they haven't seen me in a while it's just ten mins away at the school just don't know if I can but I don't want to let her down she so wants me bk to being the sociable mum I was . Before I became unwell and overwhelmed with everything . It's a nite time thing too and I rarely venture out at nite can't even think of my coping mechanisms at min as I don't know how il feel tmoro but was so proud I did a meeting with teacher last week for a progress report during the day tho and the time waiting to go was awful but I did it x

  • Oh, been there and have done that. Why oh why can't we enjoy life like the others. I know what you are saying about feeling overwhelmed. I do hope that you get to go and just be able to focus on your little one singing.

    My thoughts will be with you.

  • Thank u so much I really want to try for her sake it's just the thought really then home safe I'm trying to take Christmas one step at a time it's so hard tho x

  • Hi, I'm thinking of you. Please let me know after you go to the Christmas fayre. Let me know how you did. Be strong, you can do it :)

  • Omg I'm soo sorry ur going thru this maybe try to sit outside once a day the outside or sun is very healthy for u that's Wat I did to start I would sit on my porch everyday n it's very relaxing it might actually help a little bit

  • Have you consulted your GP or a consultant about your agoraphobia? If not, it might be worthwhile.

    Take care

  • I suffer exactly the same my partner is so supportive does all the grocery shopping etc so I'm lucky in that way. I don't no how he does it I panic thinking of him doing it it makes me so sad and down. I also panic just sat in my house or when family members come I can't even sit and talk I make excuses up that I'm cleaning I go all hot and really dizzy and fidgety it'd horrendous I'm do sick of feeling this way. So I really understand were your coming from xx

  • Were, I am so like you. Even when family use to come over, I would do the same thing, keep busy so that I didn't have to sit and talk. That's sad.

    Thank you for sharing.

  • Ano it's terrible honest I can not sit still am so of balance and tired of it my life is ruined this time of year I should be out Christmas shopping for my kids but its to hard to bare the thought of it drives me nuts x

  • I'm so sorry. It's hard when the kids are small and you don't want to ruin the holidays for them. I do all my shopping on the internet. Sending you a hug and letting you know I understand and I care :)

  • I care to thanks I prey to get normal again honest and you to ye same I get clothes online but at my age I shouldn't have to I feel like screaming it's so sad what symptoms do you have like how do you feel x

  • I feel spacy, lightheaded (that scares me) because I want to be in control of my body. Sometimes like I can't take a deep breathe, shaky, fear of the "what ifs"

    so much that it causes me to think of nothing else. Sometimes I can actually imagine myself falling down the steps or fainting. I don't answer the doorbell or the phone (have CID). I basically don't want to talk with anyone. Last but not least, it's like I am watching myself go through the motions. Oh and those scared feelings in the upper stomach are so uncomfortable.

    What do you experience and does taking care of the children distract you any?? I'm glad your partner is supportive. That means a lot.

  • I'm tired and weak and dizzy of balance my heart races sometimes my eyes feel funny I don't find anything funny nothing seems real even going out the back to rubbish out my legs feel weird. And it's hard I've got five boys my youngest is 12weeks I was so scared to go the hospital when I was in labour I was shaking like mad like if my mam asks me to go for a walj with her I think no way I can't il collapse or something I always go all hot and sweaty even talking to my partner I feel my self burning up I also have blocked ears so that makes my balance worse I try and do excersises to help with that tho. My first panic attack was on a bus seven year ago when I had a six week old baby he's seven now and I've coped that long it was really scary never been myself since x

  • I also always feel lije I'm sinking

  • Oh my goodness, I feel for you. I want to just hug you. I wish I could help. I forgot about the blurry eyes and blocked ears. I bet our symptoms are pretty much the same. It's been 6 years for me since I've become agoraphobic. I've always been anxious but 6 years ago my adopted daughter who was 20 at the time became anorexic at the same time my mother was in a nursing home and I was running back and forth trying to take care of both.

    I wish you well my dear...

  • Or thank-you so much we sound so alike. Have you got blocked ears? And if only we lived close were you from x

  • Oh yes I also have the blocked ears.

    I'm from Chicago, the windy city. Oh yeah,

    the wind scares me too when it's blowing real hard and I had to walked against it.

    Go figure...

  • Or wow

  • It's unbelievable how many people are alike I honestly thought it was just me it's crazy

  • Nope ur not on ur own by any means

  • Thanks Andy I no that now

  • We can all help each other thru this busy month x

  • I'll be here....

  • Good good x

  • No other choice. =(

  • THANK YOU ALL so very much for your input on Keeping doctor Appointments.

    I just saw tonight that there were 38 replies. When I see my own writing 2 months

    ago, I think of someone who was in quite a state at the time. Since the holidays are over, I'm calmed down quite a bit and I'm hoping to make some leaps and bounds in 2016 regarding my anxiety and agoraphobia. Wishing everyone peace and tranquility.

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