Hi I am 26 years old and I suffer from anxiety and possibly PTS and OCD. I know for a fact that I have anxiety from getting shot back in 05'. I will never forget that day. Earlier that night I had been out with my at the time best friend. We went to another friends apartment to hang out and get high and drunk because that's what we were doing at 16. It was around 2am when we decided to go home. We called another friend that lived in my neighborhood to take us home. When he got there we went outside and left with him. We noticed someone was following us, that's when we the driver told us that he had just gotten into an argument with a man about some stolen drugs and that was him following us. The man turned out to be another friends cousin that had fronted the 2 boys some Xanax and one of the boys got stolen and they were accusing the driver of the car that I was in. (Kind of twisting I know) So the driver in the car I was in tried to lose the other vehicle. I remember driving over 90 mph and I was scared to death that we were going to wreck. Me and my friend begged to let us out. After about 10 minutes of trying to lose the driver he cut us off the highway and started firing a gun. I remember hearing about 6 shots and as we drove off I felt the pressure in my back. I never heard and windows shatter so I wasn't 100% sure. I said the words " I think I got hit" at that moment everyone turned to look at me and put my hand on my back and when I brought it back up it was covered in blood. At that moment I realized I was about to die and this is it. I thought it hit my heart and I could barely breathe. My lung had collapsed and the bullet went through and broke some ribs, went through and out my liver and my stomach and was resting on my large intestine. They then drove to a vacant subdivision and waited while one kid was picked up because he was on probation and my best friend left with him. I found out that night that she was no friend at all. I remember her crying and saying " she is turning white" I recall telling myself this B*tch is crying and I'm dying. When I realized she has left me I knew I was really going to die. I was devastated that I was going to die like this. I was helpless and kept saying call 911 then I would have to catch my breath. We were there about 15 20 minutes before he rushed me to the ER. I remember thinking it was to late.. When he got me there he carried me in and yelled " she's been shot " they rushed me back and started cutting my clothes off. The nurse told me she was going to give me some medicine and I was out. When I woke up I couldn't believe I was alive. One of my longtime friends was there holding my hand and she said are you ok? That was the first tear I shed. Recovering was the hardest I had over 30 staples going down my whole stomach. The pain was worse than being shot itself. It was about a year or 2 later when I had my first anxiety attack. I was driving in the same place where I was shot and immediately my heart started pounding, I thought I was dying and just felt CRAZY. Ever since then I have them a lot. I get stressed out a lot and worry all the time. I worry about the craziest things. My main fear is being shot again. But I also fear I have or will have cancer, a heart attack, stroke that me or a loved one will die..... it's crazy. I hate that my mind is thinking like this on a daily basis.
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