I have had periods of anxiety throughout my life although when I was younger I was unable to define my feelings as anxiety - I just thought I was going mad. Despite having come through them all when I get another episode I am just unable to think that I am ever going to get back to 'normal' again. I had a period of great stress last year and I think the anxiety I am feeling now is as a result of this. I feel like I don't exist that all around me is strange - I find it difficult to concentrate on the TV as I think it might not exist or I feel that the people I'm watching on the TV might be feeling like me so that just exacerbates my fears of going mad. As I go through the motions of daily living - having a bath - shopping - making a meal - I'm not sure it is me that it is really doing it but something at the back of my mind must be sane as otherwise I wouldn't even go through the motions. My appetite has gone. Up until a couple of weeks ago I was running most days but I'm not doing that at the moment as I feel I can't. To be frank - I think I was overdoing the running to get over the stress that happened last year. I retired from work last year and keep myself busy with an allotment and a lot of voluntary work - but this anxiety is making me think of just throwing in the towel. I have read a lot of the posts on this site and I can relate to all the things that people have said about anxiety. I suppose the reason I've written this post is just so someone can reassure me in some way. When my best friend died almost 20 years ago - I was prescribed and anti-depressant by my GP - and I have been on it more or less ever since - I came off it a couple of times but had to go back on after some stressful event in my life. When I retired I felt really great and with the help of my GP came off the antidepressant and have been OK for the past 12 months. However, I have had to go back to my GP and I have been taking the medication now for the last 1O days - so I don't think it has had time to kick in yet. Just need some help in getting through the next couple of weeks. Thanks for reading.
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