29 yo feeling shocking! - please help!

[alan2014]

I am a 29 year old registered psychiatric nurse. I have been working in MH for over ten years. I have always been a worrier when it comes to health and acknowledge i have a degree of health anxiety. Back in September 2013, I woke with a hangover and remember having the weirdest headache.....like a heavy numbness - almost like I wasn't there.....really hard to explain! problems have only gradually got worse since then, and i can honestly say it's beginning to ruin my life. it's effecting my mood and motivation and I am in states of panic, which i always seem to come out of alright. i have done my nurse prescribing course so the thought of taking any medicines terrifies me! the headaches are the most bothering. i have them everyday now without fail. i can distract myself for a period of time but i always end up in dizzy like states and panicking. The headache doesn't usually hurt and it's just heavy throbbing numbness.......i really need some help on this one because what i am getting from health professionals is everything i am trained to do and don't want to become a recluse and never leave the house. In recent weeks, I ventured out on the trip of a lifetime for a month.....and flew home after a week, something I have never done.....that's how much it is effecting me now!!! the GP is fed up of me and has referred me to a neurologist which isn't for 4 weeks.....and given me Amitryptiline which i daren't take!!! I also have pain in my upper back and feels like something's wrong there, could it be connected? i am also loosing weight as i am a big lad, so i even googled sleep apnea.....which can trigger anxiety and depression and tension like headaches......it's never ending!

[Hidden]

HI Alan x Sorry to hear you are suffering, it sounds to me as if you are suffering from general anxiety indeed, but as you say you are qualified you know yourself that no matter how many people tell you it is anxiety until you believe it yourself you remain in the vicious circle x Anxiety can affect our whole life and cause us to miss out on things we would normally love such as your trip. You are in a good position with your training to be able to do what most of us here would tell you to do anyway as we are not medically trained but go by what the professionals tell us in order to deal with anxiety x Some on here take medication and say it has helped a great deal, and yet I am confused as you say you have done nurse prescribing so will not take them? You must know the benefits and downsides so maybe try at least x We have a rule about google as it never gives the answer only a million more symptoms. Hope you are feeling better soon x Donver

[alan2014 in reply to Hidden]

thank you It's so different when you are dealing with yourself.....i know I have all the symptoms.......I just can't seem to accept it.......the headaches are almost constant now.......i really don't know what to do......trying CBT etc really doesn't appeal to me as I know so much about it x

[Hidden in reply to alan2014]

I can understand what you are saying about knowing these things but you need to go at them from a different angle that of the patient and not the teacher x Headaches can be caused by tension and over thinking all the time. As long as you have had all health checks then it could be the thing you need the therapy x

[Hidden]

Hi alan & Welcome

As people have said already sounds very much like anxiety & if your GP has given you a full bill of health in every other way then it leaves you dealing with the anxiety as the cause for how you are feeling

I do appreciate it must be really difficult as you are trained to help rather than receive help & it is like I always say when a midwife tells a woman with the next push this wont hurt but unless she has had children she has learnt her profession from training but to experience it first hand & what it does feel like is another experience that only when you have gone through it can you know how something feels , in your case been anxiety

You really need to take your professional head of & put your patient one on & ask for help , there have been other members on here who may see your post that have been in exactly the same position as you but have come through & so will you

Try & think of the positives which I know can be hard when we feel so bad but when you have got through this & come out the other side you will be even better at your job as you will know exactly what people are going through as you will have had the experience to , even though I am sorry for any of us that have to experience this awful anxiety

Try the therapy , maybe meds , what your knowledge knows is one thing , experiencing these treatments yourself is another one no matter what you may think & what have you to loose , you wont feel any worse than you do now , in fact you may have something to gain

Keep talking on here to others that know what it is like to suffer , it really does help

Love

whywhy

xxx

[alan2014 in reply to Hidden]

Thankyou for that.....I find a pint or two helps......not excessive........to chill every now and then and on Amitryptiline it says no alcohol.....i know we are all unique and so are our bodies so don't know how i'd react with this combination x

[alan2014]

I've noticed a lot of people saying about magnesium.....had my magnesium levels checked and they're normal though x

[elena1]

Hej my colleague ( I am a nurse as well), which tests has been done so far? simple BP every day? you've had hard stressing, time so, you can simply have some symptoms of depression, It was in my case,but we are different,so try to don't push yourself you must be OK just now..wait for MRI scan,you know if something is urgent what to do. Everything should be checked,but please as one friend above said: be patient now not nurse,Is not helpful at all. Your imagination is bigger than experience in general medicine so wait...if you feel,instinctively something is getting wrong,ask GP for urgent referral to neurologist. But good idea will be meet somebody with anxiety team..

take care and don't afraid Amitriptiline. Is old but well known and safe medication. You can drink glass of wine.No more and not WITH tablets

[alan2014]

Thanks Elena. I want to be able to have fun still and have more than a glass of wine.....info weeks without bit want to be able to have xx it's anxiety and I'm accepting that now it's awful