Hi I'm new here and suffer from anxiety depression and self esteem issues.

[Butterfly77]

It seems I've been in therapy for countless years I've been on antidepressants for 11 years. I keep getting into relationships and then after some time I feel it's not working. I'm 37 now no kids,

I know I'm not ugly but I am on the inside I'm in a relationship that started bad. He wouldn't date me bec I was too fat. I lost all the weight and we started dating in August. He doesn't like to kiss or be intimate it's very one sided and I dealt with it until the past month I started waking up panicky worrying if this was it if this was what my life would be like. Don't get me wrong it wasn't all bad. But we pleasing him only has gotten to me I get that men aren't emotionally. He shows his emotions in other ways btw he is 31. He's said he would touch me more and kiss me when intimate. But then there is the control, if I say I wanna do this or that etc he will say well how much does it cost and do yoga at the gym were it's free. He has a problem

With me visiting my sister who

Lives an hour away. He will only go every 3 months he has no friends no hobbies and just wants me around. I don't know what to do I got very unhappy the past month and took a week off of work. I've talked to my family and since this is a pattern with me they have had it. They feel

Get rid of him and fix myself. I am afraid he accepts my anxiety and insecurities who else is going to accept me. I'm so afraid to make the wrong decision. Now my bf hates me

He's had it with me. Feels

People show emotions in different ways. Said he would kiss more and touch me more but he's not gonna change who he is and that kissing cuddling is not the basis of a relationship. I doubt myself maybe I am wrong I just don't know need some opinions

[Hidden]

Hi Butterfly.

Welcome to the site. Your relationship seems very one sided, any man that see's your vulnerable and procedes to control you is not worth keeping, he sounds very selfish and I am sure you could find someone else who really cares. Your anxiety will only exacerbate the situation. I don't know what medication you take but I would see your GP and ask for a review surely there is something out there that can help you.

Take care Kenny-w

[Butterfly77 in reply to Hidden]

I take antidepressants and was put on neurontin. I speak to relatives and they are tired of my patterns with men. I'm afraid I'll never change I also see a therapist now again since this has happened.

[Hidden]

Hi and welcome to the site. Try speaking to Relate, you can do it on line and on your own. They can help with relationship issues. Have you spoken to anyone about this yet? You should go and see your GP as your anxiety will only get worse with this situation.

Don't stop talking on here either it always helps to get it out into the open.

Take care x

[Butterfly77 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you I won't stop coming on here. I appreciate the responses