I caught some feelings.. For my guy best friend.. Ugh!

[viclovesmcr]

I'm best friends with this guy, lets just call him K, he is so kind and big hearted & such a gentle giant.. He listens to me all the time, he says im the only one who gets him & see's the real him & if i ever left him he would go insane, and he's even told me he loved me.. But i know, he's not in love bcoz he's hurting from his ex. And i was not in love with him either but we've been kind of flirting lately & K has always been close to me & i love him deeply, he cares about me very much & we can trust each other & he makes me feel better & vise versa..

Well.. Lately i've been feeling wrong coz he's been flirting with me like saying he wishes i was there so he could hold me because i told him about my anxiety, and he's always lookin after me.. And he loves fallin' asleep with me on face time, every night.. He told me to never leave.. So i was feeling wrong & saying to myself that him and i are not right for eachother,

Not like im thinking.. I dont love him even though im getting that from him.. I was gona tell him we have to stop & that this isnt right for best friends to do.. & he said i comfort him blah blah blah so i sent him a song today, that one by Johnny Cash 'it ain't me babe' youtu.be/rMi0VJZWLtM(Not working as expected?)

Coz i dont want him to think that im in love and that i want to be with him.. Coz i dont even though i do have feelings for him..

Im really not in love and i dont want to jeapordize our friendship..

I dunno what to do..

Hm..

He's obsessed with me though.

Definitely lol

Oh btw i went to the doc today & i just have a clogged ear. Haha nothin serious.. Hm..

Hope all is well!

V xox

[Hidden]

Hi Vic

There is no harm in having men as friends when you are a women , but unless you both feel the same then it can end up very messy & obviously from what you say you don't feel the same way as he does

I would say before it goes any further or someone gets hurt you need to draw a line & make it very clear that you don't feel the same way as he does & even though his friendship means such a lot to you you cant continue if you feel he is falling for you as this would be very unfair to him

You could maybe put this in an email making it very clear to him

It will just encourage him & maybe give him hope if you keep falling to sleep with him on the other end of the computer & you have to start saying no

I can understand you wanting support & he gives it you but it seems he wants to over step that line which you are not interested in

I thought I had read you have a boyfriend ???

If so this would be very unfair to your BF as well , unless in the last week or so you have split up

Pleased to hear its not to serious with you ear , did they give you anything to help ?

While you were there did you manage to tell them about how bad your anxiety is & how you are feeling , I hope so , that's the kind of support you need

Love

whywhy

xxx

[viclovesmcr in reply to Hidden]

I broke down last night, i started sobbing and called him in the middle of the night while i was sobbing and he was there for me & was telling me to calm down & i finally told him that i dont know if him and i should be friends because the way we were talking wasnt right and i have a GF, and he understood completely but then him and i were both unsure and confused & he knew that i dont know what i want because i told him that at first when we started flirting it made me uncomfortable bcoz we're just friends but then i got used to it.. And didnt mind.. And he likes it, he wants to hold me & kiss me & idk if i do or dont want that.. & we both agreed that we don't want to ruin what we have & he doesnt want to get hurt.. I always know how to make him laugh & he loves it & he always wants my opinion & i just.. Like he said, i dont know what i want.

And frankly, i dont think he does either.

Well we ended up talking for 4 hours and him not letting me go so i again fell asleep with him on face time(which is like skype not sure if u knew xo)

This is so messed up, whywhy.. im so unsure.

I really appreciate you replying though

And the doc game me prescription for nasal spray and allegra.. My ear is clogged with water causing me to feel imbalanced.

I didn't tell about the anxiety because thus doc wasnt my doc, she was an emergency room doc because i couldnt get an appointment with my doc for another week & i was not gona suffer any longer haha

Vic xoxox