Not only is anxiety ruining my life. It's ruining my dreams too. I have obsessive thoughts and not only is it ruining my life it's ruining my dreams. In my dreams I can't do certain things because of anxiety and the obsessive thoughts. It's been this way for me for about 1 week. I'm just feeling as if I will never be free from my thoughts or anxiety. I feel like a prisoner in my mind. I want to feel normal. I don't want to have these thoughts. Idk what to do anymore. I keep on forgetting to bring this up to my counselor. I'm not on any medicine but I'm in a need of a free mind. So I can think freely! But I can't and I can't even enjoy time with my boyfriend because of of my obsessive thoughts and anxiety. Mainly my obsessive thoughts. I have one recurring thought over and over again in my head. Tbh idk if going to love pass 19. I'm at 18 but 19 in July. But this thought makes me think and say I rather die than hurt someone. I really do. I can't even be around my nephew or children without freaking out. I seriously tried to cut my hand off because of the thoughts. But I didn't get deep enough and I just cut the deep enough to see flesh. This obsessive thought seriously rules my life and I can't stop it. I want to feel normal again.