Anxiety Support
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What type of anxiety do you have?

I was wondering what type of Anxiety do everyone has on this forum? I'm curios to who has the same type of anxiety as me. I don't want to feel alone because I feel like I am :(

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I think everyone has different anxiety ,I don't have health anxiety but have gad,I would say slight social ,but feel other problems as well,I have no self confidence,I don't like mixing with other people,like it better on my own,I do go out but often have to force myself and limits to where I go,I feel I have a lot of issues,sometimes would like to crawl under a stone and never come out.

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I feel ya. I feel like I'm slowly going insane. I have a mixture of a lot of anxiety. Heatlh anxiety, social, phobia but I think I suffer from OCD worse. Like I have horrible disgusting thoughts that won't go away and it continues to play in my head over and over again it's crazy. It drives me insane and makes me depressed. What really doesn't help is looking online and someone said " you maybe in denial." And that acared me s**tless. It made me seem like I want these tgoughys and get aroused by it and I love it and I don't feel ashamed by it but I do. I punish myself everyday for having that's thoughts. I cry at night I cut my wrist with a kitchen knife for having these thoughts. It's so horrible. I haven't told my counselor about all of this but all I said was I had horrible thoughts that won't go away no matter how much I try she told me I have obssevive thoughts. But I haven't told her the rest but the rest makes me believe that I may have severe OCD. It's so bad that I thought about killing myself because I felt like I'm trapped in my own mind.

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I have;

Agoraphobia

Anxiety and panics

Depression

Health anxiety

Social anxiety

I've cut myself in the past

Attempted suicide

IBS which is really hurting at the moment :-)

OCD but under control.

Eating disorder, thats ok at the moment.

then there's the physical stuff :-)

I bet I've missed some out, all these names for these disorders are confusing at times,

but the above, does not define who I am, they are just barriers to a happy life, which I'm breaking down slowly.

Wishing you well

B

xxx

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Mr B

That list makes me feel as though I am half way to being healthy.

Also is IBS irritable bus syndrome circa 1989 and how does that effect you?

Decrepit Grog

xxx

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Haha,

Those buses :-) I must try one one day, the IBS is still frigging hurting, but I'm still going to go out today, no surrender !!!!

B

xxx

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Well Baylien,you have it all! I believe most people have "bad" thoughts,some worse than others,I m ashamed to admit some of them! If I go into a pub I feel throwing a drink in people faces,and that is the people I like! I know I would never ,ever act on it,but it's there,you will also know yours are just awful thoughts you won't act on,so try to distract yourself when they come,I do.I never get to lie in bed in the morning awake as when my mind starts really bad,so I have to get up,then I go about hating my life and there is nothing really to hate about it but I feel I have these massive problems.

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Hi Lindalou,

Its not as bad now, in fact I'm in a good place at the moment.

I found when it hits hard, all of the different aspects of anxiety can raise their ugly heads, and it was a struggle at first, especially not being able to eat aswell.

For me, I found realising everyone is just struggling in this life, even the ones that look on the surface as if there ok. When we look deeply, we dont need think we would like to throw drinks at them anymore, we dont need to judge them, for being different, even when it really is pathetic.

AnxiousGal,

It can feel like we are alone, and indeed we are really, but its a beautiful thing to be able to connect with another human, even for a little while, like on here.

I now feel like the world cuddles me, its nothing tangeable, I just get a warm feeling, that fills the emptyness now, and its so much more than I ever got from my parents or a partner. Its all around us.

Your not trapped in your own mind, your just fighting or running from the thoughts, we make friends with the thoughts, we just dont react to them, not even a blink of an eye. We connect to the beautiful world around us.

Everything we need is available it comes from within.

B

xxx

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May I ask what thoughts you are having?

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Hi hun :) I have GAD (generalised anxiety disorder), social anxiety that varies depending on other factors and I also have trichotillomania (that stems from OCD).

I hope this helps, you're definitely not alone on here :) xx

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Health Anxiety and moderate GAD.

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When I have these thoughts I think "what if I really want this and I'm trying to suppress it or trying not to believe it." But then I think why would I want to hurt myself and cry every time I think it? People who have that's thoughts gets pleasure from this I don't. I just want to bang my head against the wall everything I have a thought like this. Then I had a dream last night that scared the shit out of me. I'm just scared that what if I really want this. But I DON'T! I rather honestly kill myself before I actually act on these thoughts. Which I never will do. I will never in my life act in these thoughts.

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Hi

I've had in the past lots of horrendous thoughts, and literally scared the shit out of me lol.

I've found now its important not to fight or run away from thoughts as thats what gives them power. I look on them as mine, and see them as clouds floating across a blue sky.

I like looking at the space between thoughts, there's some peace to be found there.

wishing you well anxiousGal

B

xxx

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My thoughts are sexual unwanted thoughts. It's disgusting and I literally hate myself for having these thoughts. I'm thinking why would my mind torture me like this? Does it really enjoy me crying at night? Hurting myself? Or thinking about suicide? These thoughts literally made me feel like I want these thoughts because it keeps popping in my head. I will never in my life act on it. I honestly will put myself in a mental hospital before I even act on it. Which I will NEVER IN MY LIFE DO! I can't even be around certain people because of my thoughts. I can't even watch a movie or tv because of these thoughts. I try to block it out but it doesn't work, it keeps reoccurring. My counselor told me that I have obsessive thoughts. Before I had these disgusting sexual thoughts I use to obsess over death. I believed that if I did something I would die. I believed that there were signs everywhere. I see a date on tv and I wondered "will I be alive on that date." Then I kept believing what if I die at a young age? This person did so it can happen to me. Now I have these disgusting desturbing sexual thoughts and I feel like dying. It's that bad.

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Hi,

I know how blooming horrible all this is, I've been there.

Your councillor, are they giving you help with managing all of this, make sure you tell him all about it as then they may be able to help in this specific area.

do you have any medication, sometimes it is helpfull at least just to calm us down a bit and give us space to do our practices.

I can only say what I would do, and that would be to look at the thoughts as clouds drifting by, accept them as just thoughts, floating past. Its when we make a judgement about them, they take hold, you are the blue sky, with these thoughts just floating by, no need even to get involved in whats being said, the content, just smile like smiling to a beautiful sunny day, and look into the beautiful blue sky.

Its not much help, but its what I do in these times of terror. I hold on to beautiful things.

Wishing you well

B

xxx

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Thank you. It means a lot. I was on medication but they took me off of it because it made everything worse. But I haven't fully told my counselor about this so I'm going to tell her Tuesday because that's the next time I will see her. This is really getting bad and it's ruining my social life and also my personal life. I can't even hold down a relationship because of these thoughts.

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Hi,

I suffer with GAD, slight social anxiety/depression.

I am proud of myself because I have just returned from holiday in Turkey with my family, I needed to do a lot of talking to myself to get me there as anxiety took over before I went.

Baylien I so admire your positivity and yet you suffer with all sorts of anxiety symptoms.

I too do the visualisation of putting my thoughts on a cloud, acknowledging my thoughts but don't get involved with them. I also do the same visualisation but changing the sky to water.

As I have an excellent yoga teacher her meditations and visualisation skills help me enormously. We also do breathing exercises, that takes the mind up and down the spine, and filling the body with white light and finally encircles the body in it, as a protection.

I wish you all well on your journey. Eunice xx

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Thank you Eunice,

I'm not good at taking positive feedback :-) but thankyou for those encouraging words, means a lot.

I have done yoga type visualisation and energy practices with taoist stuff. Its all good fun, and so nice to actually relax sometimes.

Well done on the holiday !! sounds lovely

Wishing you well

B

xxx

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Your very welcome Baylien, your posts are always full of useful, positive information.

Yes, the energy practices are good fun, and luckily I do relax. That's the only thing that keeps me sane:-) if I could define sane.

I went to see the Shaolin Monks at the theatre in Manchester, I wish I had there meditation skills, the energy in the theatre was dynamic, and talk about mind over matter, when they lay their bodies on spears and broken glass, perhaps I should go and live in the Buddhist Monastery:-)

I wish you well Eunice

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Haha, I've seriously thought of a monestry too, but I'm too much of a rogue still.

I do Buddhist meditation and love it too, and yes it does help, those little relaxing times do keep us sane, and give us the strength to enjoy each day.

I used to train in a shaolin type martial art, didn't do the spears or glass trick though :-)

Have you seen this film its in several parts but is beautiful its called

Spring Summer Fall Winter And Spring

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Hi,

Wow, talented to, I love martials arts, but I have done the sedate ones, Tai chi, and as a youngster judo.

How old are you then, if that isn't a to personal question, I am 66.

I haven't seen that film no, but I will certainly check it out.

I don't believe your a rogue:-) for one minute. xx

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Hi Eunice, I'm 52 just, and feel like 27 :-)

I've tried Tai Chi, and think I would like to do it again, my friend teaches, so I should really ask him.

I did wing chun, for 35 yrs, I taught too, however, i just do it once a week now at home with one student who teaches now. I'm liking the softer side of it all now.

Oh, I am a very naughty boy :-) well I was in the past, haha.

Thats why I need so much, meditation to keep me on the straight and narrow path :-)

The films a bit slow, but the story hits like a rock

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Oooops, my wife just told me I'm 53 :-)

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Hi,

I have never heard of Wing chun, only Chi gong?? Yes it would be good for you to take Tai Chi up again.

Will watch the film and any other you may care to recommend.

By the way your only a youngster yet:-)

Lovely talking to you. Eunice x

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Hi Eunice,

I've done Chi gong as well, its all related in the chinese martial arts, and taoist meditation stuff.

Lovely talking with you too.

Take care

B

xxxx

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I have GAD coupled with low self esteem and no self confidence.

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