Ups and downs

This morning I felt like poo - I just didn't want to get out of bed and lay in bed for hours. When I did finally get up I felt a million times better and wish I had done it sooner. Then annoyed that I had wasted half of a perfectly good, sunny day. I get the impression that the mornings will be a struggle for me.

Today I am feeling less anxious than yesterday. Yesterday I was anxious that I had an anxiety problem. I actually woke up breathing rapidly and with that funny feeling of everything being warped as various different thoughts rushed through my head. Yesterday was all about acceptance. And today is about moving forward after accepting it.

I have bought myself a diary to keep track of my thoughts. I feel stronger now than I did this morning. I feel a lot stronger than I did yesterday morning. Every time I have felt better about things in my life, there always seems to be something that knocks me down.

I guess getting used to the ups and downs is all part of depression. It seems like a long journey ahead...

4 Replies

  • Well done.For the last few days i've slept badly and felt panic and anxiety when waking up.

    Since Tuesday I have not actually got up except to go to the toilet

    I have a good view from my bedroom window and can see it has been a lovely day,but still I don't want to get up.

    So well done you are making progress

  • Oh Bertty,

    I am sorry you have not been able to sleep well, and getting up is a struggle. Have you been eating at all? I've made the effort to eat today, and feel much better for doing so.

    You won't regret getting up and out once you've done it. I'm here if you need to chat. Send me a message if you like. And thank you for replying. big hugs x

  • Hi Nena

    Maybe I've got depression but no I have not eaten today.Just cannot be bothered.

    I am hoping for a good sleep tonight and maybe my mood will lift,

    Thanks for your support.

    I will let you know how things progress.

    Bertty xx

  • It certainly sounds as though you have depression if you have been in bed and cannot be bothered to eat. I have days when I cannot be bothered to eat also, but when you actually eat something you feel so much better.

    It will help you to get a good night's sleep also. Its amazing how damaging we can be to ourselves when we get into these moods. Honestly, we are our own worst enemies.

    We are all here to support each other. Yes, please do let me know how you are getting on and perhaps we can get to know each others' stories a bit better. Good luck. xx

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