My roommate came home and told me to close the door to my room (she always has to find something to scold me for because the other one does it) and i told her it's not nice scolding me like that and that she left her stuff in the washing mashine but i'm not telling her anything. She said she's not home to take it out. Worse she said that If she wasn't saving money she would move out and the other roommate even more.
It's so bad that i can't live good at home but even If i could i played a gym card for here and i have a birthday next week and invited people. I don't know what to do.
Note : It's a normal accomodation, not student so i can't tell principals or whatever
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Against_the_current
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Is this the same roommate or a new one. I think you could use some assertive training. It is your place too so tell them your plans and they can just deal with it. I really think you may be letting them take advantage of you. Then because of that they don’t respect you. It just makes it worse.
They do take advantage and think i'm taking advantage of them. I'm litterary too soft and kind and people like my roommate, bully, dad think i'm selfish and cruel which If i was i wouldn't be suffering so much rn
I don’t know about you taking advantage of them but unless you learn how to be more assertive they are just going to continue to step all over you. Assertive doesn’t mean the b word. It means standing up for yourself.
Just moving out isn’t a solution. Someone told me once that when you run into someone like that they just keep showing up reincarnated as another person until you learn to deal with it.
note to self- EASY for me to say EASY for me to say Easy fro me to say Easy for me to say:
establish house rules- including all expectations and duties
No verbal abuse allowed
Write my self signs: on Cards to hold up as i cant say well: STOP
NO!
STOP UR BEING Abusive (however one wants to say)
Please LEAVE NOW
stuff like that ...taylor make to a person situation
YOURE BEING A JERK LEAVE NOW
id use my cards since i have a hard tme saying it.....
just thoughts...sure others can do better
for me establishng ground rules from start has been helpful
iGNORE anything that is insulting or hurtful or demeaning or hurtufl in any way.....NOT MEANT that way......NOT MEANT disrespctful in ANY WAY>>>>>everyon here knows ur going through hello and rescpect u....sorry not more sorry not mroe sorry not more ten thousand group hugs from all here ....
in reply to
dear brig ...feel all alone scared no one likes me so scary to be wi5thout resoures cna bottom of world....its soooooooo scary brig ..feel sooo vulnerable and its sooo scary .feel i have no power no one in my corner and eveyone harsh and strong...why would they be so cruel brig i try to be soo nice and they are ust so mean brig why why why brig its soo crushing brig.....knuw u beelive me brig...and othrs....im tryin all i can brig i feel soooooo alone in the world and no one wants ro likes me at alll brig hwen they yell and scream its soo scary..........im trying so hard brig....thanks for remendig me that everoen here thinks of me even thou they are of line....thinking of me at their work........nice i have allies here and to know u havent dropped me when i dont hear from people...good to now t5ha5t just busy not uv dropped me....its scary brinand im so otired of being scared ...just warn out....
in reply to
feel sooo unwanted and kickdd arond brig....why are they always so angry and mean brig? thankful for all the caring people here brig..they do care about me andothers dont they......????i matter to them dont i brig not blowing my horn but just saying.....im tring brig really i m ....really i am....
try- this...understand tho......nothing neg in one neighovr helping another deal with hard times...its not infering or implying....anything neg or oror ....beg u not to go there ....plse........im sharing this....and if its not useful....fine.....
people help me and help me by remindng me about this waht work and i forget about.....so u see there are differnt forms and connotations of help.......we talk level
ur father is a parent .....pwoerful hurts associated with what aprents say as comes across as not advice and his form of rotection but feels like disapporval and rejection
why we instructors never never never teach famliy
tooo personal
why people use therapists
when parents say things ...it hurts soooooo bad
when george says it or gives me a hard time
ah ...guys harrasssing each othe5 isnt a rejectin itsth oppsite on farms........dude.....is that????? ur car....man iv seen wrecks that look better.......then u know u accepted....
takes long tim to deelo social armor.....im 99999999 years old...ur still no armor stage blastd by tone and
U willl.......finish school........may be his way of willing peple not to drop out
trouble is......
often has the opposit effct
prob his style..........his..........style
i need to undtand thats him
what i do an annn.....im me.......
which preety suer u saying...
dismiss anyin thats hurtful.....ignore anyting i say tha5 doesnt work or fit.......juicst sharing....
smore?
we are all v senstive on inside....not a bad thng...i have lots o social armor.........ur young.......not expected to hbe 56 at whatever age u are.......
this is a tap;e of forest sounds.....just sharing.....se e what u think .....
in memory of someone v very dear to me long ago......
She doesn't understand it's abusive behaviour. I told her i don't like that behaviour and she just said so hurtful things like "If i wasn't saving, i would move out, the other one more". Everyone is discriminating me because of my dad trauma and dad because of others trauma. How am i supposed to work like that dad? How am i supposed to clean and do whatever in this state roommate?
u wont ....violate me ....cuse me ....i said.....i wont allow this ....pardone ...me.........I wont allow .....excuse me........Im not doin this' pardon me......im not
repeating a mesage like rtraining a dog who jumps up on eople...now it can knock over kids an scare them...well the dog or adult wont chang immediatr and will go back to hei habit
ergo.....i have to undestna d that on them and i repeat....the message and have to be tough inside....
no dad.....im not going into the marine corps//// etc
my ***** thoughts: dismiss if not undrstanding!!!!!!!!
house rules
house grup meeting
formalize and post all expectations and duties
duties to be done ...no grey..no leaving disshes for othe5rs
eeryone doing their part
post all house rules and sign...
one method....easy for me to say
all......my barns and lessons run on barn rules.....period
its saftety not ego as some will harp..no...its safety and they dont ....run or work a t my barns and lesson porgrams
no grey......
how can peopel be so cruel is our way of saying we cant unedrestand
sure.......can we undertand mean people??course not....ur no t tha5 way.......and never will be and we will never understnad such mean people ....never.......its incomprehendsible.....alll true...
we need to get u safe areas and stick wth what these peple say.....
those mean people
never get anywhere near my horses....NEVER
u.........have special pass............them NEVER...just remember that......u can feed and brush my horses any time ..i show u....the othe5s......NEVER......
Grrrrr, i HATE bullies!!! Why do you need to close the door to YOUR room? Fair enouugh, it's understandable if you were playing music but even then she should ask you rather than order you.
Maybe she needs to take her washing out the machine, maybe she should not have started the washing if she can't finish it.
Personally, i'd be telling her that she needs to check herself first and make sure that she has everything in check, that she needs to stop with the dictating and get off her pedestal because you will not allow her to treat you this way and that the way she is, is uncalled for!
All the best to you hunny, just know you deserve respect & throwwwww that party girl!!! Just be respectful and let your housemate know in advance, try have a different relationship if you can. If not sweet, I think you could benefit more from finding another accommodation. Somewhere safe and better for your mental health.
Thanks hun. Right, i just wish she could understand
i train horsses and people to work and train..i train instructors...
repeat repeat basic msesage.......NO
NO means NO and NO....means NO...m
NO still means NO...did yesteday will tomooroww....
repeat stand u r groudn keep same message dont cahge it til they hear it
STOP...Ur not welcom in my room
leave now
sign.......ish........ish .....
yes,,,,,ur helping me.......anothr mystry of life...
some pictures are soothing
For me.....For me ...just sharing.....welcome to edit what fits or works for u.......just sharing not an order ..sounds like what ur fath does...physicoans orders.......bossy bossy bossy..but dad...ur not lsitening and ur sure not hearing.....ok lets practice that
DAD ur not HEARING me !!!!!!!!!!
is this right? am i close? tell me if im way off...
tc
yes my horses are waiting just for u.....no one else....brushes in special box just outside the stall door....no worries...ill show u everying u need to know.............beginners are better ...never can get this across to peole.....better...ud never hurt my horses....
why dont peopole hear that.....see u can help me....why dont epople get that????..i tried to get an art club gong for 105 th tme.....bomb evertime.........nope...to shy too scary ok
alone
again.......why i go to work to help forget.......student5s are too scared to step across the line and dare to fail.....no such thing but u cant tell them that....
Learn to detach yourself from toxic people. If you can’t physically move away just ignore them. They hate being ignored. It’s fun to watch how agitated they get when their nastiness doesn’t hurt you. I would be only too willing to close my door against such nastiness. Meanwhile strengthen your position financially and mentally so that you can arrange to move to another place. Why should your happiness depend on nasty people? It’s a losing scenario. Take control of your mind and your life.
ur safe with Tink now...shes always with u.....billions fo lightyears away...only tink and u know how to get there....no pain now no suffering no scar y things or peoplel Tink always with u***
whose helping whom.....did people put u up to this make me feel needed...........oh mann.....i walked right in to that one.......
gol man.......brig......man......am i slooooooow sometimes........what a hoooooot......
seeeeew funny students thiking they are botheringt us.......
what if there were no scared students????????
aint that a killer?????????ha ha ha ha u think ur bothring us..........oooh hoh i get it ...is this the candid camera show....oh great one....hi im waving u got me ....oh u guus jst kill me..............she is doing a fantstic job helping th old man feel needed......oh man.....thats soooooooo funny.....
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ahhhhh. i should go to my work place but just cant move...
Who should I tell about my condition?
Tell me how I should feel about being homeless and jobless?
