Looking for encouragement

[FeralFriend]

Hi guy’s and girls year’s ago I suffered a panic attack while driving, but I also had a bout with vertigo and bronchitis. So fast forward year’s later I suffer anxiety just being a passenger in a car. I feel so ashamed and down. The only person knows is my other half and she has been so supportive but I feel so scared at times and feel helpless. I can drive local but the thought of getting on a highway as a passenger brings back that fear from years ago. I also have the fear that my anxiety meds won’t help when I need them. Anyone else have these feelings?

[Icewall42]

Yup. After my panic bout in 2017, and again in 2019, I started getting anxiety from anything that reminded me of those times. Even just trying to fall asleep in the bed I was using at the time. It was so bad, that for the second bout I slept on the couch for weeks because I kept feeling panicky from trying to sleep in the bed.

It fades a little with time, but I still have some lingering associative anxiety. It might be something like PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) where something triggers a flashback. I've been trying some self-help coping techniques to squelch these feelings when they come up, but it's not a quick fix. Doable, just not quick.

As for meds, I always worry they will fail me. But so long as the dose is high enough, and you have the right med for you, they should be pretty reliable. I've been on max dose Lexapro and I've felt the panic try to break through a few times, but I've not had an episode since I started it. And I keep some Valium on hand for emergencies. Meds might not work perfectly, but they definitely help.

You're certainly not the only one battling these feelings, and they just take time and sometimes help to overcome.

[FeralFriend in reply to Icewall42]

Thank you for your response. I know I don’t want to live in fear anymore. Sleep is a problem too but I find it I have an active day it helps sleeping

[Icewall42 in reply to FeralFriend]

Same. If I wear myself out during the day with some kind of exercise, I generally sleep more readily.

[The_Color_Blue]

Absolutely! You are not alone in these feelings or experiences, and you have no reason to feel shameful. From the sound of it, you have PTSD - or, given your anxiety, perhaps CPTSD. Would you tell a soldier coming home from Iraq that they should feel ashamed of their PTSD?? My guess is you would not. Try to show yourself the same card and compassion.

Working with a properly trained therapist can be incredibly beneficial - if you’re up for it. Many find that EMDR (a technique used by specially trained therapists) profoundly beneficial in dealing with CPTSD. However, as Ice mentioned, there are techniques you can try on your own as well. Sitting with yourself snd interviewing your anxiety in order to better understand the root of the fear and/or the range of triggers may also be helpful.

This is a conquerable issue. You’re not broken; what you’re feeling isn’t wrong or bad. Try comforting the anxious part of you the way you might comfort a friend while they experienced a similar panic attack. With the right treatment regimen and some self care and compassion, you will get through this in time. It will get better. On the days you struggle, reach out as you did today. The whole community is here for you.

[FeralFriend in reply to The_Color_Blue]

Thank you Blue that means so much, I have battled for years and there were times that I had no issues, it flares up at times but I remind myself of the times I went through to get to where I am today. I am as I write this that this will not dictate how I want my life to be.Thank you

[The_Color_Blue in reply to FeralFriend]

I'm thrilled that you have the insight and perspective to look back on your journey and appreciate where you've been and how far you've come. That's so important. Keep that perspective and use it as a basis for positive self-talk; remind yourself - as often as possible - just how strong, powerful, and incredible you truly are.

[FeralFriend in reply to The_Color_Blue]

I had a great day today, thank you for your response, it does help.

[Lve2dance in reply to The_Color_Blue]

It is such a relief to have found this site... I want to tell my mom if I'm such an outlier, this site would not exist but my anxiety occasionally is a joke to her she makes fun of it. Even though she reacts scary to other things

[Icewall42 in reply to Lve2dance]

Anxiety and panic make you feel alone, but yes, this site is definitely proof that you aren't alone by any stretch. Lots of us are dealing with similar feelings, and they are definitely not a joke and nothing to feel ashamed of. The brain is an organ, too, and mind and body are not separate entities.

[Lve2dance in reply to Icewall42]

Exactly.. I get anxiety when I ask or tell my mom certain things because I never know how she will react.. Plus she is super controlling. I can't talk to certain friends... I can't accept gifts, from another, Just because canceled, for Thanksgiving.. Or gets rid, of gifts people gave me.. She keeps things of hers from years ago but destroys mine

[Lve2dance in reply to Icewall42]

My friend also wanted to get me a new, tv and dvd player for the holidays to replace mine.. My mom is so mad he canceled on Thanksgiving she won't allow any thing He gives, me in the house... I have to get what I don't want.. I tried to calmly talk to her before a, concert last night explain what I wanted but she said just add him give you the money and I will get what I want even though it's my TV. She thinks money solves everything it does not replace being nice

[Lve2dance]

That is scary.. I'm sorry for what you are going through. Vertigo is not easy to live with and I can imagine it makes driving a challenge...