Heart broken. Bitter-ish

As an “introvert” not only do I get worn out easily of social interactions but i’m also very closed off to most people. When I do choose to let someone in it’s most likely because I don’t have a choice or I have made that choice because they feel like home. Then I go off and cater to this person and show them my love, loyalty, and rare instances, affection. I’ve let someone in so easily and almost became an extrovert with this particular person. I laughed nonstop with this person until my neighbors had to bang on the walls for me to shut up. We told each other we loved one another. I fed him, I listened to his traumas, and I accepted him for who he was and his past. I wanted to learn everything I could about this man to truly love him right.

Long story short, it didn’t work out and I came to realize the illusion of who he was and how he portrayed himself was nothing but a facade. The love is still there but the little self love and respect I have for myself won’t let me back into his heart. I have no choice but to move on and all that’s left of me is the bitterness of letting this person into my home, into my arms, into my little world for him to not choose me.

[ZERO_ZEN]

Hi. I'm so sorry this happened. You are a good person to have been there for him like you were. You were acting in a genuine manner, so that says a lot about you as a person. As an introvert, I understand how much it takes to let someone in and effort it takes to invest in another. I hope your heart heals soon.

[Hidden in reply to ZERO_ZEN]

This means so much thank you for those kind and uplifting words. I’m already starting to feel a little bit better

[Hidden]

I don’t think it’s stupid at all abysswalker it’s the truth. It just seems like the time to truly get over the relationship is double the time spent in it. Your comforting words on here help more than you think. I’m glad you’re on here and responded to this. Thank you.

[Hidden]

Thank you Laurier you are an angel and I appreciate you sending your wishes to me during this. I think about him everyday but I have to keep reminding myself of why it ended and not so much of the good moments. I’m feeling better after reading your comment .

[Hidden]

You are so sweet I can tell how caring you are as well. Thank you for your support I’m sending you love and peace today. Thank you for helping. 🥺