Anxiety and Depression., The comments... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Anxiety and Depression., The comments made to us by other's that are upsetting...

Luna_Child profile image

Let's chat..

No doubt this has happened to lots of us which is why my "old world" Italian parents don't know about my anxiety and depression.

What are some comments made to you that have been upsetting.

Examples include:

1. You'll get over it

2. Calm down

3. It's those pills you take

4. That crazy Therapist you see is putting ideas in your head

5. Take a nap you'll feel better

6. Stop thinking that way .

7. It'll go away

8. You're making a mountain out if a molehill

9. It's nothing

10. You're exaggerating

11. Smile

⭐Please join in and add anything that others have said to you about your illness that's upset you..⭐

You are worthy and beautiful

HUGS

🤗

430 Replies

You'll feel better in the morning, smarten up, calm down, eat you'll feel better ( it's all about food with Italians) you're crazy, wish you were never born, die, "You're a Therapist, you're supposed to know how to fix yourself" (Therapist's are people too...hello...) Control yourself, grow up, act your age, deal with it, that's life, I wish you were dead, get over it, here we go again,

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

good comment by a counsleor - "do u have to apologize for living"

bad - NO bitching/hes an elitist/ very military /all men are predictors

all men are lustful /all war and fighting caused by men

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

HUGS XX

Isinatra profile image
Isinatra in reply to Luna_Child

Sometimes I can hear others thoughts. Why can’t you….why dont you….you’re not really trying. Then there’s the verbal thing…if only you would…you should….you could….have you tried this…..why did you do that….Sometimes I want to pretend I can’t talk. Give us a break.😬Jeez, Luna, did somebody really say THAT to you? ❤️

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Isinatra

Yes

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Isinatra

HUGS XX

Isinatra profile image
Isinatra in reply to Luna_Child

💕

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

(O MMMMM G!!!!!!!!!!!! i have never heard such incredibly insensitive comments - other than our german riding inscturers but they weren't family)

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

HUGS XX

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

brilliant luna just brillliant brillinat vriliant - i sooo miss having someone significatn to talk to U and dolpin and other have been suuh ch huge help

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

HUGS 🤗

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

They are all very bad insensitive bullish nasty comments said to everyone here who posted. It's good to get it out & realize you're not the only one! Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

brilliant

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Incredibly sensitive Brig. We were the chosen for a reason

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

LC- hard to find receptive listeners- who know what they are doing- cant thank u enough- soooo sorry your family is not understanding and soooo judgemetnall- medical conditions are totally real as u know-

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Thank you Brig xx

Hugs ♥️

🤗 Hugs xx

I don’t talk about it much so no really insensitive remarks. The only thing I get is what I call one upping. The so you think your bad listen what’s going on with me thing! Makes you feel worse because you feel so unimportant! Not heard etc. people think they can make you feel better or shut you up by making you feel worse for them. Crazy!

im not a real vetwhen they were a vet

when they were a professor

when they were an instctor

none of which is true other than consumers

i have hundreds of hours in vet med and ER and anesthesia

its not real since in not in practice

I cant have ptsd since im not a real vet

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

HUGS XX

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Anyone who's been traumatized by any type of trauma situation can have PTSD. I can't stand no it all's who think they have life figured out and are just a gift to us all. Thanks Brig excellent point. Hugs 🤗

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

so impressed luna

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Xx💜🌞

comment to LC- the mionions send their love and gigantic long hug

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Long hugs back big guy! 🤗⭐XX

HUGS XX

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

Luna- could u discuss the concept of mature love and mutual respect?

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

HUGS XX

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

Luna- i ask this - because i trust u- and think u give good sound advice/ trustworthy and I don't use that word lightly-a good friend of mine- suffers in silence with a horrible condition or complex of conditions- - she is a wonderful wonderful person but- she has to live with this sysnderom through no fault of her own- and its chronic and ongoing- no breaks but endless -- I feel so so bad for her- not pity Luna- not- u know feel sorry for her I'm not sayingic that but- she really needs a Mayo clinic but I'm sure she knows that- i wish I had the money to find her the finest of the medical teams but again sure she knows that- i so wish I had a magic wand-

any words of advice?? thanks brig- ps I feel so bad for her but shes soo brave

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Oh I hear you sweety HUGS I'm sure she has looked into care I don't know. Maybe have a chat with her openly. It's tough. We all wish we had that magic wand.

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

i so wish i had some magic words to ---- life has been so unkind to certain people through no fault of their own and they have to endure and endure and nothing is easy ......every thing or everyday they are in pain or rejected from their familiar or society when they are so thoughtful of others its not like they are out stealing cars but rejected for what reason rather than being embraced by tehri family why makes no sense but some mares are material and some are lousey mother same with stallions and geldings,,,,,,,,

how is its that cinderella was saddled wth the family and same with snow white no they just had rotten inlaws or families noting wrong with cinderellsa

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

🌞🤗👍⭐⚓

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

depresson also results throhg the loss of hope as well as the chronic pain somehow we have to find a way for her to have hope or someitng to look forward to what would a bucket list desire or goal be ?

Catgirl123 profile image
Catgirl123 in reply to Brig57

You are such a kind man Brig.

"Stop obsessing" (Actually said to me -- someone with obsessive-compulsive disorder -- by a highly-regarded and beloved member of this very forum.)

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to mrmonk

HUGS XX

san_ray70 profile image
san_ray70 in reply to Luna_Child

My daughter has suffered with problems for nearly 30 years. I can not say anything to help, she will not answer the phone.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to san_ray70

Is she seeing a Therapist that she talks to? I would maybe think about yourself seeing a Therapist to talk to about how you should proceed. My mom & I get along until she tries to help., I often see it as critical as it is critical but my mom doesn't. Her way of helping is to tell me I'm doing everything wrong so I would seek the support of a Therapist to help you with how to proceed as a mom. I'm not saying you do this I just can only offer this solution I see as the best option to clarify roles. Best of luck.

HUGS 🤗

XX

san_ray70 profile image
san_ray70 in reply to Luna_Child

Thanks but over the years she has seen therapists, I have been to meetings with her. Thankfully my grand daughter managed to cope with her moods, basically bringing herself up. She is now 20 and has a boy friend. I just wish I knew if they are ok after this past two years.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to san_ray70

Do you know where they live? Close by? Anyone you can contact to check on her?

san_ray70 profile image
san_ray70 in reply to Luna_Child

I know where she lives, but in the past I have stood at her door begging her to open it. I am too old to go through that again, she lives where I used to Essex. I live in Nottingham. I asked both my children to come to my mum's funeral, neither came.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to san_ray70

I'm so sorry..I would seek the advice of a professional as there's so much going on here esp not going to their grandma's funeral.

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to san_ray70

im soooooooo sorry luna

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to mrmonk

Not surprised.

You’ve got a face like a smacked arse 😄

HUGS XX

You are deranged

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

HUGS XX

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

Ty 🐬

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

I'm so sorry

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

Ty Luna.

I'm sorry for you and everyone that has stuff to add to the post. People can be so cruel.

🐬

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

People can be ruthless and rotten to the core

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

amen!!!!!u gooo girl!! finally the genie is out of the bottle

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

It needed to come out. I felt like I couldn't be the only one tortured by other's brainless mean ruthless statements. I needed it to come out and I'm so sorry for all of us.

I think no one in this forum has been immune to such statements unfortunately.

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Dolphin14

doiphins help so much

Shit ….that’s not good 🤭….bastards!!

Yup....

Was a doctor. Oh well...

🌞

😅

That did make me laugh. Ty .... takes my mind off how I felt being called deranged.

❤️🐬

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to Dolphin14

Ah we love deranged dolphins here...... 🤣💖💖 x

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to hypercat54

Thank you

❤️🐬

Awful

Omg ,That's great! I needed a laugh! 🤣

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to lovemydoggy

terry fator

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

HUGS xx

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

I'm not surprised. It doesn't matter what letters come after your name people can be total shits

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

So true. I was at the lowest point in my life and those are the first words I hear.

Then the list goes on like you've written out.

😢

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

😖

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

I keep adding to my list because I see others lists and I think I forgot that one.

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

This is so sad. :(

We were all treated unkindly.

🐬

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

Abusive Unkind 😡🤬

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

Most definitely. 😢

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Dolphin14

im sorry dolphin and LC - so unkind

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Brig57

Ty Brig

We all got hurt and sometimes we still do.

❤️🐬

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

I agree. I hate it when people say "oh you're just too sensitive, you'll get over it". If only I had the guts to hit someone it would be these situations. I was taught not to hit and I'd get arrested for assault. It's not worth hitting someone but imagining it is pretty cool.

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

Hahahaha. yes would probably be a good release. But the consequences would be tough.

We just have to remind ourselves these people haven't walked in our shoes. They have no idea. They are totally clueless.

I think it was a great post. Helped to unload to people that understand.

❤️🐬

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

Yes I would not want to suffer those consequences for certain and these people are not worth it but imagining it feels kinda good. 👍😊

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

Oh yes 👍.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

👍

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

im rolling on the ground luna- u are sooooo right- finallly someone said it!!!!!!!!!

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

I needed to get it out. I hate it. 🤬

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

abscesses are best lanced and drained then heal better than festering

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

That's true. It's physical , dentist 🦷 does his thing, antibiotics bamm healed from pain in a few days. Emotional pain no antibiotics to heal ", infection" in entire body so to speak and re": of taking antidepressants I don't think they work well , just my opinion and anti anxiety meds are great but a controlled substance, don't last long in your body.

melbrown profile image
melbrown in reply to Dolphin14

🫂 That's even worse

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to melbrown

Yes, it was quite painful. Shocking really.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to melbrown

Yes it is

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Dolphin14

utimate betrayal

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Yes for sure

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Brig57

Thanks Brig. People can be cruel. I was having a PTSD reaction to a death. I was not and am not deranged. The word cut like a knife. But I knew it was just wrong coming from someone who knew me for years.

All in the past now. She showed me a side of her that is uncaring. She's got a problem.

❤️🐬

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

Finding out how cruel a friend can be toward you is hurtful & shocking and calling you such a name as is heart wrenching.

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

So true. This was a Dr who knew me for years. She blew me away.

Believe me I have heard so many things from supposed friends and family. On my more sensitive days I take them to heart. Other days I ignore. I know I'm better that's what counts. PTSD is going to be with me forever. I have better coping skills but some days I don't feel very strong. These are not as frequent as they used to be.

Again, I thank you for the post. Im sure it was very therapeutic for many people.

❤️🐬

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Dolphin14

people do not not not not not understand that professional are still taking int he environment they are working in and it seeps in with constant and prolonged exposure to trauma and suffering of others as the mind is learning and attempting to understand the environment and what its seeing even if its toxic having spent years in the trench myself people don't understand the trenches and the expsusure ..the prolonged suffering and can be extremely

and people don't get that eventually it accumulates

u would think today people who should know would know but they don't and why i don't konw

they haven't sat with the dying and all we have been exposed to thiy think i tis like looking at a bad picrue but the fortet medical people are immersed int this environment around the closck for years -

i don't understand how people can not nudersand - the thousands of hours of exposures just as valid as radiation of a different energy the suffering there real very real suffering of other sbut they dismiss it because they haven't been there

we experience it they think it radically different

just as friends who experience their cancer over long periods or their suffering on chronic experience it not

oh so and so is in pain or discuss pain or emotional pain as some concept

concepts are not exeroencential

ptsd results from experience not some theroy

blows ur mind that people don't understand how debitiliatting suffering or living int he trenches is vent the military rotate people unilke midcine and our society who just work them til they drop I'm sorry for what u have been through and people ignorance but sounds like u acdpeed the injustice and don't want to bring up old wounds ,,, but u can realte to others and idnentifyu with then in a second

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Brig57

The trenches are tough. There's no glamour in the jobs. You give and give, this makes me feel good. To help people through their most difficult and frightening times. There isn't a lot of support in the trenches. Just take what you are given.

As far as death goes. It was so hard. You sit with someone, you hold their hand if they are alone, if family is present you support them. In the mean time there are 5 other people to take care of.

Thank you for sharing your own experience. It's helpful. It's not something we often talk about in the field.

Yes, I've moved on with most things but get a kick in the butt with wounds and memories sometimes. I will speak about it in order to let people see there is a light at the end of this path. We just have to want it and work hard for it

❤️🐬

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Dolphin14

honory vietnam nurse

tribute to your dedication and giving

a tribute to true nursing unsung

has nothing to do with PMA and mhs is clueless

murphy rules the clinics not PMA

we need to take care of those who have given soo much

youtu.be/stS6BIx8LkA

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

Dolphin you make so many good points. Thank you for putting it out there. Blessings for your support to others Hugs 🤗

Xx

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

Indeed you are better 🐬! I take some things to heart too and other days I let it go. I am more likely to let it go now because they're nasty and why waste my brain cells on ignorant nasty people.

Hugs 🤗

Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Dolphin14

certain people are significant to me esp the longer u get to know them the more they grow on u and the more our respect gets and they slowly let their story out du tomodesty hey wont tute their horn but they are the walking wounded and desireve the medoal of honor for what they do .....u and lc and other share move me to say tings i normeall wouldn't and u don't get mad about it...........i am so thankful that the people that are mpoarotnat to me igrnoe stupidity and take care of themselves...i cant take losing them not in primicpel but because a rose is not a rose is not a rose and these people are just ex tra extra textar special.....and id croak if something were to happen to them..........seen and heard too much ......and cant take the loss of the beautiful souls leanvig us tiwh the weeds u cant kill and the crows......enough of the pc nonsense .....we take care of the angels and the song birds first.......the crows cant take care of themselves

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Brig57

Ty Brig: Those are very kind words. I try to live in the " no judgement " zone.

Just enjoy people for who they are. As we've talked about listening is such a big part of this. If people can't listen to each other where is the friendship? I don't think it's a very good one.

Thank you for listening.

❤️🐬

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Dolphin14

we all listen back and forth .....v one sided....v role playing

we all

take care of each other as a community

back and forth

not a role

we take care fo those who are significant to us

and not put up another parking lot

literally or emotionally

take care of and treasure what we have in terms of people that are there for us and nature or music or pets or oro

leading to quality fo life

critics stay away from my friends....not.........very very very much not

welcome........I'm kind......I'm

the blind side tho too.........

I've seen the damage unkind people can do.........steer clear of my freinds

walk around..............and take it somewhere else......not near my friends......

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Well said. 💜Thank you Brig you're a kind man and I appreciate you letting me into your life as your friend.

Hugs 🤗

Xx

Exactly! 🥺😖

melbrown profile image
melbrown in reply to Dolphin14

och... hugs 💛

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to melbrown

Ty Mel.

❤️🐬

"You're being too dramatic."

"You really need to have more faith."

"At least you've never lost a child." - this one really gets to me. It's like saying I'm not allowed to be sad because others have it worse... so by the same token, I'm not allowed to be happy because other people have it better? It's a very twisted way of thinking.

HUGS XX

Hugs!

❤️💜

It very much is twisted 👍😳

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

when people are hurting ...the last thing they need is lectures advice or clinical refrigerators......

helpful like an anvil to a drowning man or woman

I'm a nice guy

i also make

one hell of a wall ..........step around partner.....you comments arent welcome here

Perriex profile image
Perriex in reply to Brig57

"when people are hurting ...the last thing they need is lectures advice or clinical refrigerators......"

This!!

I got this in droves concerning my posts (and PM's) about getting involved with someone on here... I just needed some comfort, but I got lots of judgement instead...

anyway, we all need to remember to stay kind.... 💜

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Perriex

your psot helps me a lot.......x billions.........i saw soooo much in the hoshosptals....most people just needed someone who cared and they could cry and cry and cry ( could write books about them but no one cares) .....=yes......people are hurting hurting...they don't need clinical people or lectures...........lc and dolphin and many others care and care and care rightly so.......people are hurting and these people get it......thank u sooooooo much for your post that really helped me a lot.......hats off to al the kind or super kind people here and the work they re doing...........they inspire me sooo much.......ijust lack the words...

Perriex profile image
Perriex in reply to Brig57

Thank you🙏.... I think we all just need people to care.... to listen.... to understand that we are speaking from a place of deep pain.... that the courage we are using to share our feelings with strangers is a huge effort.... we are putting ourselves in a vulnerable position with each and every personal post or message.... we are risking rejection and ridicule.... or at the very least, misunderstanding.... you are right... my hat is off as well to all the kind people on here who care and give their love.... and you are included on that list.... your words are just fine.... I can tell you are a good person, already!🙏💜🌈

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Perriex

((((((((((luna and dolphin and others hace helped restore me.....I cant take how they have been abused an d u......soooooo wrong)))))

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Brig57

(((((( in actually very vvery prortetive as a riding coach and life and ......but .....Lc and dolphin would never laugh if i liked flowers or trees......believe me i can be very very very protective)))))

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Hugs Brig! You're a kind soul. Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

u dont laugh at me for caring...i cant take people suffering and why i went into anesthesia and vet med.........medications are used to reduce suffering however ....i agree with holistic approaches .....nto jumping to conclusions but working the problem countless time to get to the bottom of things.....these conditions are inflicted on people......and society and family wither get behind them or make it worse which is exactly what they don't need.........ask anyone with cancer or any condition.....rthey didn't ask for this condition...heyh were handed a rotten condition.......and have to deal with it ........its ujnthikable how moronic families are but they are........well known by u luna ....but cant be said too many times......medical conditions ....say epitlsepsy or cancer or renal disease

has zero

to do with the person..........i don't understand how people or society can not understand this in this day of age......it incomprehensible - they suffer enough with the condition..........

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Perriex

Exactly that's why we're here.

Hugs 🤗

Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

lets say im called out to see a horse who appears depressed.......as vets we investigate the entire horse.......or animal.......it may be anything such as neural virus, cardiac, digestive, rabies, renal, foot abscess or lamintis, displacements.......tons of reasons.......i see doctors automatically jumping....its mental illness........without a full workup ....that irresponsible an d incomplete .......hundreds of conditions result in depression.......until now i kept my mouth shut as i didn't want to sound formal or doctors but what i see and hear and have experienced is incomplete and irespeonsiblie medical system............who don't seem to know proper case work up........and stigmantize people jnneecessarhyily ......even primary depression is

a medical condition.....not moral or character flaw.....well known for years and years so why are we still battling this ignorance??

kind of u to let me get balistic

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Brig you write beautifully and express yourself with honesty and sensitivity. 🤗 Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

luan- i dont like sounding medical or formal...it sonds so cold. i don't like peoel to think I'm playing doctor......however we hafe parallel training and in this case i have to put on my vet hat ......to prevent.........to prevent injustice ........medical conditions are that as u know the same as someone in a wheelchari ...........none of us would see the wheelchair....how doctors and society haven't goottin this message today is unreal.......its 30 years and this stuff is still going on??? we have to enhance the persons well geingt and quality of life........what about war veterans or burn patients...how does being shocked or labeling help.....

we all know the answer.....its unthinkable

it happened to that person..they didn't ask for it.....then how on gods earth can anyone not understand that today...and the worst are doctors?????????????????? its out rageous

i don't like u to see this side or my medical side as i don't want to sound formal or scarey...i rant fooooooooor people not against them....

depression can come from dozens of reasons not just the brain primarily ........medical or losses .....women are defvistated by the loss of children....father stoo......incompresheisble that anyone would not ge supportive

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Beautifully said Brig! 🤗🌟😇⚓

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Perriex

Well stated. People judge others way too much instead of just being kind. What gives others the right to judge?

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

i can not fathom where they are coming from ......

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

If they don't feel it, they don't get it.

I get even more nervous when people see I’m not right and ask am I ok? Like no I’m not, but I don’t want to admit that and have to tell them my crap. I fully know they don’t give a damn about that.

Also I really dislike the phrase “fake it till you make it.” You’re not being true to yourself. Even if you do make it, think about the cost your nervous energy took out of you. If you don’t feel a certain way, that’s fine. Don’t force it and go against yourself

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Kainan_li

HUGS XX

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Kainan_li

Very true Kainan_li I agree. Don't go against yourself.... awesome 👍

Kainan_li profile image
Kainan_li in reply to Luna_Child

Cuz then you're just adding more tension onto existing tension. And who the hell in their right mind would want that?

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Kainan_li

Exactly Kainan_li 🤗Hugs 🤗

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Kainan_li

spot on

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Brig57

we are all we have.....we cant afford to be our own werst enemies.....we all relate and support one antoher

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Exactly 😊

True

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Kainan_li

sometime i ask or people ask not judging but u don't want that person to be alone or abandoned or not get compassion.......u ok can be they are worried in a kind way too....yes ackward.....but they are reaching out to make sure ur ok.......women do this all the time with other women............they help take care fo each other and cope with life....

i get what u saying .........they care about u too.....hard to watch people struggle and not care...

Kainan_li profile image
Kainan_li in reply to Brig57

Yes I get that too. That’s a good point you make. I think in that situation I would take it too personally since I’m already in a heightened anxious state. You are right that they only show concern cause they care about you. And the other person has to choose how much they would want to share

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Kainan_li

to be clear-im not challenging your senses- some people do mock people when they are down....others debate- do i say anything...will i insult him but what if he's hurting like his grandmother died or his dog....and no one cares.....or does he have food ro when was the last time he ate...is his father beating him or his mother.......so do i say anything or not ........

esp women pick up on peoples pain....and they are the caretakers whether official or not- they are hard wired to hear pain frequencies..........i do get where ur coming from but-----they may be genuinely sympathetic or sense ur not dangerous and show concern.....is he all alone in the world?" that kind of stuff just breaks people hearts and they wonder....idd i turn my back on someone that hadn't eaten in days??? but what if insult him???

they feel for****** u.......cant stand to see u suffer....

Kainan_li profile image
Kainan_li in reply to Brig57

That’s a very good analysis. A lot of considerations may go into it. I feel like most people though will not say anything because that’s just the culture here; we respect people’s privacy. So when someone does show genuine concern, it can come as a surprise because it is usually not the norm. This is contrary to what I had said earlier, but saying something when you determine something’s not right is a good thing.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Kainan_li

I agree 100% Kainan_li. 👍

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

👍

I don't have any words to add but I am giving you a hug in return. I have battled depression and anxiety for years. I am battling at this moment. My mom and brother give me their love but seem to think that once I begin therapy all will be well. We know that isn't true. My children aren't old enough to understand. My ex wife treated me like manure. Step children haven't said a word. So this tends to be a very lonely road. You would think that people would see inside of us. We feel exposed but no one will comfort us. There are thousands of people like us. Probably hundreds of thousands. We are not alone. Express your feelings here. It helps.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Doyg

I offer you a hug in return. 🤗 XX Hugs

Some people expect Therapist's to be handed a magic wand @ Graduation and everything will be well again. Your life will be perfect. ⚓ I'm a Therapist and was for many many years but because of an Autoimmune disorder I no longer practice. We are not given special powers. We guide, we listen, we help as much as we can.

Thank you for sharing. Hugs 🤗 xx

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to Doyg

Well when I told my sisters one said nothing and looked embarrassed. One said 'Oh yes I know about that' and gabbled on endlessly about her own problems. The last one said contemptuously 'What have you got to be depressed about' with a outraged expression on her face. I have never mentioned it since.

I hate when people say "what have you got to be depressed about". I forgot to add that on mine. Reminds me of my oldest brother. His 💩 doesn't stink. He's perfect!

HUGS 🤗

Sorry you got that one too. I love it here coz we can talk about the things that really matter in life and to us and get validation and support. That value is much underestimated and I have told people here many things I have never said to a living soul before.

I have found my tribe.

Yes I found my tribe too. We all understand what's going on and can support each other without harsh words

Hugs 🤗

✌💖 x

My oldest brother you would think would naturally be a "protective" shadow watching over his sister. Nooooo. My middle brother and I were very very close. He was my only supportive cheering section and would always ask if I was okay, things like that. Well, as you know he passed tragically with my cousin in a motorcycle accident. I know he still watches over me. When a male is born into an Italian family as the oldest, there's a phenomenon and that earns him an invisible crown. Need I say more. I don't exist. My parents are still living and still I know nothing. My oldest brother knows all.

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

my father would kill ........to have a daughter like u...........yr post is very isightfuland helpful...........omg.....to have sister like u........omg

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

its totally true that parents have an impact .....no matter how old the person is......and i don't doubt that they are blind to their golden boy.....or whatever...the one that can do no wrong and over look the rest of the family ...indirecdtly killing their self esteem.........the only consolation is .......here is this circle........u are a protector solid.....u are a leader- solid...u are our Lc- solid....u are loved and beloved not by one but all of us......confirmed not on day but loved and respected..(remember the out pouring of ...when we went on break)......granted your parents don't and its wrong and unjust in our eyes......that our beloved friend or colleague is not understood and respected by her family.....but........make no mistake..........this....is your real family...........and no one will hurt or betray or not respect one of our tribe our family.............u are one of us........earned not given ....earned respect trhogu your work here........solid.

I have one of those 💩 don't stink brothers🙄 According to my parents, he hung the moon😐

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

i can not .....beliee how cruel people have been to u luna and others...these are acquired conditions....just wait til the shoe is on the other foot........he's is sick or in a car wreck god forbid............or has a heart attack or stroke.........not so funny anymore.....

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

as a friend.....if someone suffered from a medical condition i would assemble a bunch of literature and give it to that brother or husband or whomsoever.............testmonails of the god awefujlness of what that person and others go through in silence.............wake up dude....your flaming sister needs u now...........not when she gone............or in the hospital stuffed wth tubes....................critics and people who make life harder she and any of us.......don't need......get a life (gee wonder why i cant get a date....lol.......guess sounding like grizzly isn't much of a help.....lol - been out int he woods too long........lol......)

Don't blane you. I've had similar responses. Talk about not being heard or understand. Hugs. ♥️

Yes. Don't know about you but one of my biggest triggers is not being heard as I had that all my childhood. Neither I nor my emotions were ever validated.

Me neither.

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

(zero nurturing is my guess .....not to intrude)))))

Not being heard is one of the most hurtful things for me.

I hear you. xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to hypercat54

sooooo true and u arnt wrong ...same with luna.......same note to us men.......people need to talk and share or vent ...they arent looking for advice.........that's not a friend or a supporter or an ally or someone in your corner....u know when someone has u back or not ...we sense it and we know when they aren't listening or hearing.........that's whats frustrating.........

they arent hearing.......and that's one of our goals.........

validatre their pain or whatever.......really heart them.......

not feel pushed away or invalideated or discoutned by lectures and advice which no offense i sense lc gets in spades........no one i know loves to be lectured

Yes mine too.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Doyg

Indeed yes that's why we are all here. It needs to come out. I'm tired of being criticized and put down as you say there's billions of us who've been treated very badly and we are in the right place to let it out. You're supported you're being heard and most of all you're very much cared about and understood. I mean that from the bottom of my heart ❤️❤️. You're worthy and deserve kindness. You're strong & courageous.

Big hugs 🤗 to all who continue to come forth and let it out here. XX

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

sooo in awe fo u Lc sooooooooooooo sorry for what u endure.......soo sorry

I am so sorry you had to hear these horrible words thrown at you and it angers me so bad I'm seething inside. Thankfully we are here for each other. You are all beautiful and worthy of everything good in life except these people who degrade you.

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

u go girl

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

U go Brig

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

someone finally has the guts to the work and not sugar coat things....ooooh the system really is soo wonderful and

no its not and its cant get fixed until we have an accurate assessment.......casuesing a lot of trauma with being talked at talked around and reprogramming and dumping on clients ...get rid of the word patients.........i a client dude ........I've been on my own since a kid.....last thing i need is advice from an arm chair office person when i live and work in the field in areas u have zero zeroepence...... why would i need advice from u ...no offense....cuz u the doctor....so what .....u should get smart enough to shut ur p and listen or know ur way out of your field......

Roxylox profile image
Roxylox in reply to Luna_Child

It needed to be said Luna. We have to let out that justified anger sometimes

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Roxylox

Definitely. It's been bugging me for a while, the things people say and do to others. You have to let it out and realize you're not alone in this.

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Roxylox

exactly ...this polyuanny stuff is nonsense.......wehn the doctors are patients for a month.....the system will change over ngith

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Brig57

listening is validating

not listenign or patronizing is shameful.....esp in this field....they should know better......

talk level or not at all.......

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Truly listening is extremely validating

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

ten bilion emotional cookies to Lc

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

For sure!

You are stupid!Find something that makes you happy!

Nothing makes you happy!

You are always depressed!

There is something really wrong with you!

Go kill yourself!

You are evil and won't go to heaven!

It's those pills you take! You need to stop taking them!

I have binge eating disorder from years of depression - I was told by a physiatrist that I am like a child, since I told her I am compelled to buy these bad thing in from stores and binge.

What a phyc? She certainly didn't know anything about having binge eating disorder. Not very empathetic!

😖🤢🤧😩😞

HUGS XX

Geez as I read the comments said to you guys I remember more of what's said to me.

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

Def brings me back in time too.

Screw them all.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

Exactly! How rotten can be people be!?

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

Horrible, they can be extremely horrible

🐬

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

Yes indeed

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Dolphin14

allows us to feel safe to be real not whats allowed to say .......valid complaints .......retrain the clinicians to listen or get out fo the biz.......not understanding human nature and u the experts ah don't think so........

Trigger for me is " Thank you for your service ".. There's a lot to unpack as to why.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to

HUGS XX

in reply to

Why does this trigger you, Lazaruslong? I am sincerely curious. 💗

in reply to

Because I feel like the sincerity has been lost. It's become cliche. As soon as someone is identified as a Vet out comes that phrase . Sometimes if it’s several people around, it almost comes out in unison. As if it's expected and the " PC" Thing to say.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to

Gotcha., it's like they say it to say it because they think they're supposed to.

in reply to Luna_Child

Exactly

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to

Well honestly speaking that's insulting. I saw what my uncle went through years ago and my ex's son was in Afghanistan and has PTSD, still my bonus son regardless of me initiating divorce. I truly appreciate and have the utmost respect for you.

in reply to Luna_Child

Thanks. I appreciate it

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to

You're very welcome

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to

i get there is a lot fo trauma associated

however i hafe two seconds to honor u in the face and defiance of a mornaonic nation and

i don't have the words or time to discuss this shamefuj cowardly naturion that turned its back on our veterans so that the best i can do and is meant to honor u ..........sorry if it causes hardship

in reply to

It makes me feel sad to know that you feel this way, Lazaruslong. I am quite sure I may have said the exact thing to you, some time back in another thread.

Here is the thing, though, I meant what I said and I felt compelled to say it because I felt the need to let you know this. Many, many times, perhaps, it comes from sincere people who feel the same way as I do.

in reply to

Thank you for your explanation. Yes, I realize that there are many who mean it sincerely. In the moment, most times it is difficult to sort it out . Kind of like the " Hearts and Minds/ thoughts and prayers " statements. Although, it has a different feeling coming from other Vet's.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to

Understood 💜

in reply to Luna_Child

💕👍✌🏻

in reply to

You are most welcome, Lazaruslong. 🌸

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to

welclme the frick home

standing

o

vation

thank u ......for all u endured and your loses

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to

True as well. I've said same

lovemydoggy profile image
lovemydoggy in reply to

Makes sense.

cutey patootie doggy ❤️🐾

Soprano611 profile image
Soprano611 in reply to

Yikes. I’m guilty of saying that. My deepest apologies!

in reply to Soprano611

Thank you.

We're all human

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

finally get rid of these refrierators and tricks .....with vulnerable people

scripting talking at people

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to

we are trying to honor u in the face of an ungrateful insulting shameful nation

" Control yourself " " Grow Up"

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to

HUGS XX ( I just remembered more)

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to

Oh yes the grow up one!

Yes I forgot that one too

😔🤗

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to BTCCET

Thank you 🙏 ❤️

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Hb2003

💜❤️

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

((((((so impressed with your listenting skillss lc)))))))

HUGS XX

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Luna_Child

Hugs 🫂

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Hb2003

🤗. HUGS 🤗

"It's all in your head, if you wanted to be happy, you would be." "You should be thankful that you are not homeless or sick, many of us had a bad childhood."

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply to

Like you can just do happy snow face 😄….bastards!!

in reply to Sillysausage234

I can do happy some days, Silly Guy, this is the problem. People in my life think if I can be happy some days, then what's so different about all of the other days? My GAD is a bully, it lies in wait, then pushes me to my knees. Getting back up can be a struggle, yet I always seem to have just enough fight in me to get up. It's exhausting some days.

We are the strongest ones, if the truth be told. Anxiety and depression are not for the faint of heart.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to

Absolutely beautiful and true. We are the strong the courageous the tough who can take it. Thank you for pointing that out⭐💜

HUGS 🤗

XX

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply to

It is overwhelming sometimes….being silly is my coping mechanism when I stop seeing the funny side of stuff it gets dark and scary ….I’m glad you know inside yourself well enough to bounce back comes with a lot of experience and pain

There's actually a book called "Bounce Back" you can get at the library or Amazon. Not expensive. I bought it because I look at it all the time.

Hugs 🤗

XX

Humor is a great coping mechanism. I rely heavily on it.

Being silly is a coping mechanism for lots of folks who've been through a lot of pain.

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

i agree i also use an inspiration board or wall anyone can make......collage like.........u all might be up there.....course....that's a trade secret.........veryvery private.....ill hide your names behind others so no one can see my true feelings and inspiration)))

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to

Ugh 😩Hugs 🤗

Bastards!!

It's just your anxiety. Even cruelor when coming from an uncaring doctor, who's acting like you are wasting their time.Exercise.

Smile.

Just relax.

You have no reason to be anxious/depressed.

It's happened a long time ago. You should be over it.

Just stop thinking about it.

Did you do your grounding/mindfulness exercises?

Sure there are more... 😒

You need to snap out of it …..😂….there’s some insensitive fockers about for sure ….hope you are doing ok mel🌞

Agree ... I'm hanging in there. In need of a vacation. How are you & the pups?🖐🏖

I’m good thanks,dogs have been good lately no angry farmers of late 😄hope you get the vacation soon recharge the battery pack

We're going on 1 next month with some friends... nothing too fancy, staying in Cali... But it should be nice & a change of scenery will be good. Unfortunately work drama will be waiting for me- 🤞 will be able to go on a mini vacation later this year. Glad no angry farmers... maybe the pup is getting sneakyer... 🐶

Lots to look forward to if that’s possible sometimes it’s too exhausting ….yes they did slip out mel the other day …only gone for about 40 minutes so wasn’t a big adventure

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to melbrown

California is beautiful. Lots to see and do. Have fun 🤗

melbrown profile image
melbrown in reply to Luna_Child

Thank you. We live in the Bay Area, going to Pado Robles for our trip. We were originally thinking Portland, but ultimately decided we weren't comfortable going that far yet. Its a couple hours away & shouldn't be too busy of an area.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to melbrown

Nice. It sounds like a great getaway. Enjoy! 🤗🌞🌻

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

as they say....success is good revernge

How many pups do you have?

2 dogs ….terrier and beardie collie

in reply to Sillysausage234

Does the collie have an actual beard? 🤔

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply to

😄

Kind of a scruffy beard ….originally bred for herding sheep in the Scottish highlands
in reply to Sillysausage234

What a lovely dog, the colorings are beautiful. The little one is beyond cute. You must be very busy Silly Guy. 😉

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply to

Do you have any pets ?

in reply to Sillysausage234

No, I don't, unfortunately. Allergies run through the entire family. I do have many outdoor, wildlife pets, though. I feed the birds and chipmunks and the occasional stray cat that may show up from time to time.

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply to

We don’t have chipmunks unfortunately

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply to

youtu.be/VR43cu5Vvsw

🐿️ are so cute

in reply to Sillysausage234

Oh my, this is so sweet, I love it. Chipmunks are the cutest, really. It took me an entire summer to realize that I had two of the little guys and not just one. I kept wondering how he was able to get from the front to the back of the house so quickly. It was when I finally saw two of them together that it made sense. Yeah, I'm the slow one, lol! 🤪

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234 in reply to

I need some 😄

in reply to Sillysausage234

Yes you do! 😉

Well Mr Silly you could cross the pond get a boy and a girl 🐿️🐿️ and smuggle them back to London✈️🌍 Soon, London will have loads of Chipmunks. They are so adorable. 🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️ 🐿️🐿️🐿️,🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️🐿️ 🤣😂

He's on the bottom very cute.

They’ll go nice with my American grey squirrel

😄

How very cute they both are!! The bigger one is adorably watching the little one. How sweet. How awesome to have these cuties in your life. I must have dogs. 5 passed and I have 3. Ages 1, 4 & 9. All Shih Tzu. Enjoy these cuddly sweet dogs! 🐾🌞

My ex had a shitz u…was funny ….liked me better than her …the relationship was always doomed 😄

Sorry ..I just got myself an ex too...mine was doomed too. A mistake. The dogs were always with me cuddled up. Shih Tzu are so loving and very sweet.

Sillysausage234 that's why I like animals more than people because they listen and comfort and try not to solve all your problems

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

( his loss)

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

(glad signiicant people are surrounded by soul mates and loved ones- we just will pretend not to notice......boy tho makes us soo happy)

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

🤗xx

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to melbrown

HUGS XX

melbrown profile image
melbrown in reply to Luna_Child

Hugs 🫂💗

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to melbrown

❤️💜

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

(the minions said- glad L'c' was saved for us from her ex and critics-- they want to invite u to a love lc party and birthday party.....they said...she always nice not like the mean people.........well have a big cake and icreream....ooh they can t wait)

UGH!❤️

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Isinatra

I know right

How about 'I don't believe in depression'? and 'Pull yourself together' like you were a pair of curtains. 'What have you got to be depressed about'?

Shitters people s*ck!

HUGS 🤗

XX

Did I tell you me and charlize went out on the town at the weekend?

Oh you little hellraiser you!

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to hypercat54

make me smile.....depression is anger turned in

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to Brig57

Very true Brig.

I kinda figured...so what did you and Ms Charlize do dare I ask?

Went for a nice restaurant meal …back to the log cabin .

🍝

Ohhh La La ⚡ Ms Charlize and Mr SillySausage. 🔥. That's a log cabin? 😂

That's def you but that is not Charlize! You put up the wrong date night picture

Haha

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

Lol 🤣

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

He is always dressing like that

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

Couldn't help it, thank you for giving us some laughs. 🤣. We need those. 🤗😂🤣 Where do you shop?

Sillysausage234

HE'S SILLY 😜
Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to Luna_Child

Haha

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Dolphin14

😂

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

lots of stars beg to go on the muppets..where they feel loved and accepted and have fun.......think there is a point in this...hmmmmm puppet making is fun

🤣😂🤣

It’s not Christmas yet 🤣🤣

Pics.

Be sure to share pictures of you and Ms Charlize 👍

Definitely will do …nice post conclusion is there are definitely lots of big shits in this world …😅….goodnight from England.

So true. Goodnight from Rhode Island. ⚓

Thank you. Lots of hugs back. xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to hypercat54

Happy Birthday luna!! from the minions

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Thank you Brig & the minions🌞👍❤️

Thanks 👍 xxx

Thank you 😊🤗Xxx

Hugs 🤗XX

Yes happy birthday Luna. x

Thank you Hypercat!! 🤗😊🌞🐦

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

we love it when u all win

x ten trillion

trillino trilion trillion

dwon with refrigetors

long live our friends and the guardians

stay away from our friends society......take ur ....somewhere else....not welcmee in this circle......

Jerk's!!!🥺😞

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Luna_Child

Yep oh well

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Hb2003

There's many in this 🌍 world. We keep our focus on the positive people even if it's just 1 or 2. It's quality. ,👍

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Luna_Child

True

12. You’re blowing this way out of proportion

13. Stop being so ungrateful, there are people dying (which could be true but in a different way. When it comes to you and your mental health, your feelings are valid! Mental health is just as important as physical health and overall wellbeing!)

14. Just be happy! (Jheez, Karen, never thought of that!😒)

It’s super upsetting, but the great thing about sharing our negative experiences with others is that it breaks the stigma around this topic! Sharing makes people more aware of how saying shitty things like this makes people feel. Not only does it invalidate our feelings, but it’s just absurd advice! “Just be happy and smile”, like, um… okay? That makes us feel worse and doesn’t help at all. But, as I said, sharing our feelings and experiences with each other breaks the stigma surrounding mental health, and gives people the chance to grow! I’ve been told all of these things and more, I’m sure most of you have too, and I’m sending you all so much love, you will get through it!❤️

Hugs 🤗XX

I have to add those!

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

great and signiifcant work Luna ...bravoo

Block them off your pm and just avoid them people like that are not worth thinking about they are just big shits 🤗

True it was hard to realize that because I trusted the person so much

The funny thing is that that person responded to my post I had to delete it because I didn’t want that person near me in any shape or form

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Hb2003

I know Sweetie we chatted about it, I know the situation. You had every right to exhibit your courage & bravery. I'm proud of you Hiba! 👍💜❤️⭐💪

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Luna_Child

Aww thank you Luna ❤️❤️

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Hb2003

Hiba you're welcome. I'm always here for you. From day one literally. ❤️💪🌞💜👍⚓🤗

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Luna_Child

❤️ if you need me I will be here for you also

🤗🤗🤗

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Zara0123

Hugs 🫂 ❤️

You are Rock ⭐ Stars! I'm so proud of all of you and if it was not for you all, I could not have posted this. Be proud of yourself ...yes..you you & you for letting it out. This post will remain up for a while and you add and I'll add a 💩 ton more I forgot. To the DREAM TEAM. 🎉

You all ROCK! You felt comfortable, courageous and strong enough to purge 💪
Isinatra profile image
Isinatra in reply to Luna_Child

Good night, Rhode Island! Thank YOU!

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Isinatra

Good night my good friend. Thank YOU! ⚓

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Luna_Child

Yasss ❤️❤️❤️🫂

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Hb2003

Good night Miss Indiana, my dear friend. ⚓💜

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

speakint of

ahhhh

rock stars...........no adrien no rocky

What do you have to be depressed about?

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to RemySue

HUGS 🤗 XX

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to RemySue

😳🤬

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

realllllly good work luna and company

Exercise and eat betterPositive thinking

I just don't get it! What's wring with you?

Just pull yourself up by the bootstraps

Get more sleep

You're sleeping to much

Just off the top of my head, those our some of mine. 🤨

Hugs 🤗XX

You forgot about “snap out of it”. My husband uses that one…

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to FifLove

I forgot that one. Yes the almighty button we press that miraculously makes us all better.

Hugs 🤗

XX

Honestly, it was what no one said to me. My wife never said "I'm afraid of your mood swings, please get some help". Instead I found out years later before I was finally diagnosed with bipolar 2 and my daughters were on their way to being women. I cried for many days on and off and I was angry at myself for the trauma I had caused (no violence).

The people who give advice without any knowledge either don't want to deal with the situation, think they are right and are trying to help or just like telling people what to do. Even those who are family have to be discounted because they have not walked a mile in your shoes.

I will say that my lack of self awareness and the fact that I scared my wife and daughters crushed me. I did finally get the help I needed but I am very remorseful about how I behaved - though this is many years ago. That is something that stays with you. As much as I do know that my emotions and thinking were screwed up by a chemical imbalance in my brain, it was still me that that caused emotional harm.

It is always about ourselves and how we deal with life and people that make it easier or harder. Having wielded the metaphorical bat myself, I can say that it feels terrible once you realize what you are doing or have done. Maybe what is needed, is for a very calm and collected version of everyone here to be able to tell those "who know better" than you do, what it is really like to be you in very personal terms. For them to hear from you how it feels to have them speak to you this way; undervalued, worthless, angry, ashamed, defenseless, alone.....

Always know that as long as you are trying to get better, that is all you can do. Others can assist as part of your team or be detractors. It's up to each of us to decide whether it is healthy for us to be around them.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to dmt1121

Very true, very well written dmt1121 With a lot of courage.

I'm sorry for all you have endured & the brain / nerve center chemistry off kilter can definitely do a number to our thinking and our behavior throwing us off balance.

Forgive yourself., You didn't act out of rationality. Strength for getting help.

HUGS 🤗

XX

dmt1121 profile image
dmt1121 in reply to Luna_Child

Thank you. Your words mean a lot to me. Almost crying again because of the guilt. I think one of the hardest things to do is forgive yourself.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to dmt1121

You are strong and sensitive. Perfect combo. I think you can definitely forgive yourself as you've made things right by your actions of writing letters and "weathering the storm".

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to dmt1121

Anytime you need to chat I'm here.

dmt1121 profile image
dmt1121 in reply to Luna_Child

Thank you.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to dmt1121

You're welcome

Blue4567 profile image
Blue4567 in reply to dmt1121

It’s a hard situation to be in, I’m glad that you have kept trying to get better. I remember my mother had/has mood swings, but she has not reached for adequate help. Thanks for posting.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Blue4567

HUGS 🤗

dmt1121 profile image
dmt1121 in reply to Luna_Child

The good news is that I have written a letter to each of them expressing my regret without asking for forgiveness, just to help them understand what happened and why and that it will always weight on me. Both daughters strong, caring loving women and are doing well.

One is a pediatrician with two young daughters and one is in digital marketing and in a solid relationship with a good guy. My wife and I have weathered the storms together, finding out they also had mental issues, starting in their teens (not just hormones). Thankfully, at that point I was more under control and able to be there for them. I now see them regularly and nothing is strained beyond a normal family. I am blessed and so happy to see them enjoying life in a way I never could. I feel that the damage I did may not have been too deep but who knows really.

Life can get better, even with dark days, the sun can still shine in between them. Thank you all for your kind words.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to dmt1121

You are truly blessed dmt1121

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to dmt1121

It's not your fault for having an illness that you could not control because of a chemical imbalance however have you written yourself a letter forgiving yourself if that's what you feel you need to do to purge your own thoughts that you carry?

dmt1121

lovemydoggy profile image
lovemydoggy in reply to dmt1121

I hear you. I can identify with guilt. I have learned to forgive myself about the problems I caused my son. I was all out manic for a short time. I wasn't abusive, just so involved with me, having fun and enjoying how "magnificent" I was that I wasn't being a mom. My then husband did not treat him well. Some physical abuse and verbal. I did divorce him. My son forgives me and understands it's an illness like any other. It was a much longer journey to forgive myself. You need to forgive yourself. Hugs ❤

Hugs 🤗XX

I don’t talk about it at all unless the listener has experienced anxiety and depression to. Or it’s my therapist. I have a sister who understands it better now because she has realized how our crazy family has affected her. I just keep my mouth shut and soldier on. Mindfulness has helped me a great deal. I’ve started to catch myself quicker. I don’t know if that makes sense or not.

Also most people are scared to death they’ll become involved and they don’t want to bother themselves. Cynical? Yes but it’s been my experience!

I find that to be the case too. I usually don't open up unless someone reaches out. Even then I often don't. I keep that in mind when I reach out to others who are dealing with anxiety or depression or..... I used to avoid that because often people don't want the communication. I've learned through the years that it's not personal. We tend to keep others at arms length, at least when we're suffereing the most. I make it a point, when my own issues are manegable, to reach out to people not only in forums like this, but in person. I think more people would if not for fear of rejection. I like to think that anyway, even though people can be horrible as we all know. 🙄

Yes of course. You have to do exactly what you are doing., What feels right to you.

HUGS 🤗

At least 8/10 of them and one ny husband does is "get a grip of yourself" or stop thinking bad all the time he actually nicknames me "final destination " cuz I see danger everywhere i go which is true but he takes the p*** outta me all the time ...probably to make me laugh but when I'm really bad its really not amusing xxx

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Natsteveo

No it's not amusing at all. Have you asked him to stop?

Natsteveo I mean have you TOLD him to stop?

Natsteveo profile image
Natsteveo in reply to Luna_Child

Yep he just says its a it of fun and I will say not at my expense its not xx

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Natsteveo

That's awful! I'm sorry 😞

Natsteveo profile image
Natsteveo in reply to Luna_Child

Its not nice I'm so scared to have a anxiety attack in front of him so when I get one coming on I have to go in my summer house in the garden pretend I'm going to read because he will lose his temper or roll his eyes at me tells me to stop being stupid xx

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Natsteveo

Lose his temper because you're having a panic attack? Sounds like a pretty insensitive husband. Maybe therapy for you?

Natsteveo profile image
Natsteveo in reply to Luna_Child

I would love him to walk in our shoes for one day see if he laughs then xx

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Natsteveo

HUGS 🤗 to you Natsteveo Have you thought about marriage therapy?

Natsteveo profile image
Natsteveo in reply to Luna_Child

Yes he just thinks he knows it all does my head in sometimes

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Natsteveo

Karma S*cks!

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Natsteveo

bang on

Not comments. But the eye roll or the 'don't want to have this conversation' gaze

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Cookie101

Yup. HUGS 🤗

Just get over it.

It will all work out.

It wasn’t meant for you.

You’re just looking for pity/attention.

Maybe if you didn’t do that it would be different.

You are too excessive.

You think about it too much.

You’re thinking too much.

I’m tired of hearing about it.

You’re depressing me.

You need to stop crying and get over it.

You know you can still have a baby without a man. (I know but as a woman other women can understand that at a certain age that can’t even be an option)

You can adopt.

You’ll find someone.

You’re just stuck in your own head.

Maybe you’re better alone.

It’s okay to be alone.

And the list goes on; I could be here all day. It’s hurtful. And just makes it worse.

Hugs 🤗 XX I'm.so sorry 😞

I'm guilty of saying many insentitive things to my adult son who suffers anxiety and depression... and so do i. Sooo, what DO we say after 50+ yrs of trying to help? I'm over 80 & love my son, but what helps me, doesn't help him.

Can you, or anyone share things you want/need to hear when you're suffering.

Thanks

"I'm so sorry", "I love you", "sometimes I don't think when I talk and it's wrong" "I hurt you and I'm sorry" ",I'm here to just listen"

When I was a kid and I got so nervous I would throw up in the lunchroom at school. At that time I didn't know what anxiety was. hell I don't think anybody did at that time in the early '90s. So one Monday afternoon I had an anxiety attack and I threw up in the cafeteria again. I told my teacher well actually I told a friend if she could tell the teacher for me because I knew the teacher would be upset with me. Sure enough I was right, she was upset. So upset she took me and my entire class to the nurses office. The school nurse looked me over took my temp and declared me fine. The nurse told me to sit outside with my class right there. The nurse and my teacher talked it out in front of me and the class as if we were not there. And my teacher said "this seems to always be a pattern with her." That upset me.

I've been told to think "happy thoughts and smile and it would go away."

And that "it's all in my head" like no s*** Sherlock 😂

My dad once said "I'll get over it" to be fair he was speaking from an uninformed place. Now he knows better.

Teachers and nurses behaved awful back in the day. I got some of that too I was very shy and nervous, wouldn't talk. I remember being in a reading circle and I wouldn't read. The teacher was next to me. She put her arm around the back of my neck and squeezed it. I turned red and was afraid to move.

Exactly. I remember having this conversation with a counselor and she asked me if I had reported the teacher. And I was like this was in the '90s and anxiety wasn't known as much as it is now. I mean it mental health was not something that was discussed freely like it is today. And also I have been to doctors where my mom has taken me because I would always complain of stomach aches and of course doctors and just said I was a fine child nothing was wrong with me. And again this anxiety wasn't something that could even be thought of existing in a child. As a child you were either shy or problematic or normal. Those were the only things you can be at that time. Nowadays yeah anxiety is looked at and it's not something you just say " oh they'll grow out of it when they get older ".

Yes I agree. It was awful. It was terrible in the 60s going to kindergarten. I was frightened. I was bullied because I started midway through the year. The school I left was awful! If you misbehaved, which was not I because I was shy & terrified, the teachers would make kids wear "dunce caps" and we had to parade through each class as a whole school. I was glad when it was time to move into our new home. New school.

The 60's as a child....I remember it well. I also had a difficult time.

Yes it was as awful

Yep

I'm well informed on that. My mom and my counselor who I saw as a pre teen told me all about those days. My mom actually developed a complex from her school days. When she went to school it was still segregated and you weren't allowed to speak Spanish. If you did you would get hit with a ruler. And on one particular day my mom had a math test. And she went up to her teacher to ask her a question about a math problem, the teacher responded by saying something to her that still haunts her to this day. The teacher responds was " you're Mexican it doesn't matter if you learn this or not. cause you're probably going to drop out at 12 and and have a bunch of kids. " So now she gets anxiety whenever a test is mentioned. And it was a struggle for her to help me when I was going to school and having issues with math. Cause this was still in the back of her mind. My preteen counselor who I adored. She grew up in the south so naturally she had a southern accent. And when her parents moved up north. The new school treated her like she had a developmental problem and put her in the " special " classes. And these classes basically beat the southern accent out of her. She would have to do these vocal lessons and if she said something with her accent she was whacked. Those were some dark times. When I was in the third grade which was in the '90s. I was bullied by my third grade teacher. She literally made me hate going to school. All she did was yell constantly at us. For one reason or another she would yell. And for whatever reason she didn't like me. Maybe because I was a funny looking kid. I was tall for my age and box shaped and had thick glasses. Or maybe was the fact that my mom tried to help me out by reasoning with this teacher I I don't know She just did not like me. This is where my anxiety started was in the third grade.

That's awful that Teachers were allowed to do and say and do such abusive things and get away with it. My grandparents would tell me horror stories as would my mom. My dad went private which was different esp being the baseball star of the school team. Those early years were, as you all know, what shaped and molded us into who we are today.

I remember the whole thing about IF YOU LIVE IN AMERICA YOU BETTER SPEAK AMERICAN" thing. A huge controversy, which everyone when I was a child agreed with. I lived in the segregated South in the US. Interesting thing is, there were only black people and white people as far as I remember. Yet they all had the same opinion about speaking English, or American as some called it. I know I don't need to tell you how they felt about black people in the 60's in the south. Such horrible things.

Yes I know and it's heart wrenching I'm sorry

Hugs 🤗

Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

img grrrr

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

👍

Arrgghhhh 👍

Brig57

I hope not esp without them notifying me why. Can you give me a hint on what they may have been about..words you remember someone's name? Going through it step by step right now

Hidden I went through every line and it looks the same. I'm going to ask admin. This post and many others where they remove posts completely or individual statements is wrong unless you're abusing or bullying someone. We⭐ need ⭐ to express ourselves that's why we're here. 👍We are not here to be judged by our past and the need to express what awful things happened is a huge priority. If you're Admin and you've removed posts or individual statements without discussing it with the individual (s) hand in your Admin badge.

Take a walk you will feel better.

Oh yes the famous walk that solves all your problems

Exactly.

Some people don't think 🤔Feel better after that walk? Oh all good said no one ever lol

Ah yes the famous walk. I've been told this before. If only that were true. I would love it if I could take a little hike and it cured all my anxiety. I would walk everyday if that was the outcome. And that's saying a lot for someone who suffers from flat feet

Yea exactly. Walking helps release endorphins to help us have an overall better feeling however no won't cure us. However that coupled with Therapy, a treatment plan can help us set small goals to achieve to lead us to our bigger goals. I know I feel better after a walk but it's not taking my problems away. We find ways of coping. We have to leave it in the past like many other boatloads of memories that turned us to into anxiety and depressive wrecks.

👍

One that came to my mind was “chin up” 😡

Ugh I remember that one. IT REALLY WORKS said no one ever!

Oh or Buck up! 🙄

Yup. That's a good one.

My husband: “WHY are you so NEGATIVE???”

A friend-emy: “I really have a hard time hanging out with you; you bring people down. You’re not your usual Sunny self.”

pain

Hugs 🤗 xxI'm sorry...

my ex would never let me comfort her or address her inner wounds which were evident.....talked to her mother i think......hurts after a long time ...that women are the only ones who are allowed to comfort or be there....as men are u know.....incapable of caring ....all just users and really don't care

oh really..........glad they understand us sooooooo well

know any friends that really understand us?? many many forms fo loyalty and caring........who says we don't care .....esp when u do ...everyone thinks ur ....so

u lose either way....

little wonder we are careful with people......

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Brig you're very caring it was others who wouldn't allow you to be. There are bazillions of caring men who are not afraid of showing it. You were showing it to your ex but she wouldn't let you

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

thank u ....my family assume the worst like yours.....and my staff at the college saw my support as weakness.....typdial of many horse women butbubutubut want to make it clean that there is a huge range of both genders...........i thank u and appreciate your comments LC- more than it can say...people assume all men are jerks and selfish.....some are ...its very rewarding when people u know....know u respedt them and care about them genuinely.....yes my ex pushed me away like my biologic mother...........and many modern women hate us atutmatidally but not all........

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Brig57

yes i knew she was hurting ubt she would not let me near her pain or comfort her etc.........thank u Lc...big help. sad when u cant take are of people

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

You're awesome!

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Brig57

Thank you kindly Brig! You're super supportive and very special! Hugs 🤗

Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

appreciate it.....people with daily conditions....endure...maybe u know some ...i don't know u very well, no insult intended LC- you do a great job here......just saying..its not pity......these people endure and endure and eou handure....the pain and their conditions are unrelenting....been there with severe knees.........now past......makes u want to put them into a medical coma ...just to give them a break.........how anyone can question the power of inflammation and all the toxins and pain.....these mediators are extremely powerful and no one can suppress them or negotiate ....this isn't whimpering over mild dandruff......they put on a brave face and ....sure you have seen it with friends your self....god....who are the brave ......who are the ones with courage to face this every day...........the kids at st judes do it for eachtoehr...that's the power of a buddy.........that's the power of the human spirit......they have each toehr to get each other through the day or have races or ororor whatever to keep people going........pet turtles who cares..........most people with animals who really are their families would trade places with their so called pets in a second.........as it would be...........i do not relate to the know it alls who think what they are going through is .........what??? they make up high heart rates ?? they make up the nausea? the make up the pain and fever??? what? what with these critics...maybe they need to come down and see first hand.........cancer wards........(we have them in vet med) sick sick foals and mares.......wards fuul of them............real as a heart attack dudes............

i go from kind to very mean towards mean people.......wonder why i stay away from people and why it dost bother me when moms and dads worry about their loves ones in our hospitals.....they can send all the toys they want.......to make sure their loved ones smell mom or dad........that normal i n our business...........so anials aren't depressed or get anxious?? we all know they run......to their families with casts and bandages the minute mom walks through the door.......tails banging ..........forget all about their pain.........MOOOOOOMMMMM.....

have no clue where these critics come from .....adding insutl to injury.....

apolites for venting.......

that's why we are anesthesia people......we study pain management......and all the ways to relieve suffering.......that's one of the best parts of our jobs..........then mom and dad and kids can go home and sleep.......knowing their loves ones are not in pain........

support is NOT pity...........support is .....by the grace of god....go i.........what some people endure...........

Just do It. (Pull yourself up by the bootstraps.)

Doyg profile image
Doyg in reply to samack

I wish that I knew how to do that.

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to Doyg

😂Yes how does one pull oneself up from their bootstraps? 🤔😂

samack profile image
samack in reply to Luna_Child

Very carefully. OUCH!

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to samack

🤣😂

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to samack

Exactly

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to samack

I'm trying I really am. Thank you for the vote of support. 🌟Hugs 🤗 xx

How about this one - my parents demanded to know what medications I'm on then they broadcasted it to the entire family 😡 And I have no idea of what medications everyone else is taking.🤨

My parents don't know. I'm well past 18 and politely say it's none of your business. You're an adult. That's terrible, absolutely maddening that she told your family. You don't have to tell her anything about meds therapy etc .make small talk and tell her when she crosses the line into your personal life she'll have to accept not knowing and leave.

Hugs 🤗

Xx

Unfortunately, it was a visit (from hell) with my parents and I was staying with them so couldnt walk out the door everytime they crossed a boundary. Money was tight, otherwise I would have left. I listened to hurtful comments daily including, "you need to read the comics and laugh more. " This was said to me after I explained my depression about losing an enormous amount of money to my ex who swindled me and caused a huge downhill spiral in my life😪

Parents seem to be the culprit a lot of the time. I don't tell my mom a lot because she's always and nervous wreck ( guess I inherited that). I talk to my Therapist or go for a ride. The less they know the better when they react like that. I understand. I really do. Hugs 🤗Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

(((((((((((( standing ovation L'c)))))))))))))))))

ultimate betrayal and inseneivity .....profoundly sorry

Thank you Brig57 I appreciate your sensitivity.

I was visiting my family, driving with my mom. I said kindly that I wished our family didnt put each other down and instead openly shared loving compliments. Her response? She blamed me for "always causing trouble."😡

That's awful that she said that and awfully hurting for you. I'm sorry. You don't deserve and I hope you don't believe her. I still get that from my mom who's overly critical. She always has something to say to put me down. Everytime I walk in their home I feel completely invisible. I can say things as part of a conversation and it's like I'm not being heard at all. I love my parents very much. I realize they're elderly but they still are very functional. She looks me over head to toe. She wants me to cut my hair and I absolutely will not. My hairstylist takes me every Friday , I'm "forever in blue jeans" ( Neil Diamond) but neat clean and casual. I always get several unkind / unkind critical words because my brother is the oldest male in an Italian family and I don't think he know his" little sister" is alive. Sometimes I want to pack and go and let my ex rent as he's with his his sister and I couldn't wouldn't let him stay here any longer with his narcissist abuse.

Hugs 🤗

Xx

Wow so many similarities between our families. Thank you for your support😊

Indeed many similarities between all of us. 👍🌈🌻🙌

Hugs 🤗.

Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

(((((((((((god luna- what a nightamaer u have been through ....terrible terrril terrilb so unfair and unjust- soooo wrong))))))))))))))))))))

When upset and someone says take it with a pinch of salt.

Or when referring to men…take it like a man.

All the sayings like these does my head in.

x

Yes I've heard those. 👎

Hugs 🤗

Xx

Brig57 profile image
Brig57 in reply to Luna_Child

(((((((god lc ur sooooo accepting ...hoooly smokes))))))))

(((((((som imrpeessed with lc style and listening..so impressed))))))

Well stated below

💯

Agree

💯

I get “how could you just give up when xyz is so important?”

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to TJ_93

Thank you for sharing

You don't seem to be trying hard enough to get better! Said to me by a longtime friend who I ended up writing a letter to explaining what it feels like to be me during a depressive episode . Somehow we got past that. A couple months ago same friend wrote what she thought was a text to just one of our friends, but ended up being a group text that I saw. She was assuming things about why I didn't go on an important trip (am in another episode) and after I saw it left her a message. We texted back and forth and she again said some hurtful things along with saying we shouldn't talk for a while. Nothing like pushing away a friend when they're at their lowest! This time I am not sure I will ever forgive her...

Luna_Child profile image
Luna_Child in reply to bethelbee

Oh that's awful. That's one toxic poisonous friend there. I think I'd need to let her go.

Hugs 🤗

Xx

bethelbee profile image
bethelbee in reply to Luna_Child

I will not be contacting her at all. If she reaches out, I'll tell her we really need to discuss what she has said to me and how hurtful it has been; doesn't mean I will continue the friendship..It is difficult because she is one of 4 of us that have been friends for 53 years, since 7th grade. Also her mom is the only living parent between all of us and isn't doing really well from what I hear. If she passes, not sure what to do about the funeral. Was always close to her family Her mom was always like a 2nd mom to me......

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