the anxiety is suffocating

[EscapingMyMind]

I am thankful for my parents who support me.

I am thankful for being able to have a roof over my head.

I am thankful that I am still strong enough to live on even after what ive been through.

I am thankful for the job I have. Its a place where I want to learn how to be more sociable and to be less sensitive. I tend to lose my temper by showing attitude because I end up doing all the work at my job due to my lazy coworkers. But this is way of the world. No matter what we do, no matter your financial status, we will always be doing more work than we desire. So why do I get so offended by it? By my coworkers letting me do all the work? I am the type of person to dwell in thoughts, to the point of making me turn a rude comment/gesture/expression conveyed as a personal attack. This is a trait I want to get rid of. This is a trait that will lead me to allowing others to control who I am because their depiction of me is important. if I continue this I will never be who I truly am. Does anyone have this issue? I always care about what others think of me and recently it has been eating away at my confidence because I feel most of them see me as inferior, incompetent, dumb, stupid. This has impaired me with socializing and to feel confident. I haven’t been able to get out of this funk for 8 months and life doesn’t stop for me to get better. So if anyone has any advice, please let me know.

[Sankissjuice]

So happy to read your gratitude list. Focus on your strengths and slowly the weaknesses will dissolve. I hope to read more gratitude lists. I don't have a job but I'm thankful I am not in debt.

I find that when my energy is high, everything is well. To increase energy, we need simple, healthy food (vegetarian is best), good sleep, lots of water, a calm state of mind.

To have calm state of mind, one of the tools I rely on is breathing exercises. I learnt through Art.of.Living Foundation, happiness program. It is worldwide.

[EscapingMyMind in reply to Sankissjuice]

Hello. Thank you for your response. And i started a gratitude list for the first time this morning. but didn't mean for it to end up with a weakness of mine. I started at a good job and after I had a manic episode I lost it. One mistake just ruined everything. So now I'm working at a job that makes me feel very inferior, making me feel stupid. and I'm also trying to learn how to not have that attitude. It's a very tiring thought. I just want out lol

[Hidden]

Hi Ali_sab21, Yes, I relate to all of what you wrote here. Something I tell myself is: it’s none of my business what other people think of me. I can only control my own thoughts & actions, & that is enough to keep me occupied. Meditation has helped me in letting go of my thoughts & not over identifying with them. Meditation (for me) is like brushing my teeth—I need to do it daily to experience benefits though.

[EscapingMyMind]

How do you deal with ue coworker when ur ticked off?

[EscapingMyMind]

And when you see that co worker again, would u treat him or her different or just ignore the situation?

[Brielle-White]

i can understand your position and the best way to deal it is to never badmouth your coworkers and just kill them with kindness.. don't take anything personal and don't let anything affect you and just keep this fact that you don't have to like everybody and its okay to have temperamental issues, just learn to control them.

[EscapingMyMind in reply to Brielle-White]

Thank you. All it takes is self control. I'm very sensitive lol so I'm trying to work on that. To realize that people hurting me is not intentional and it is due to them having a bad day.