We have to hold on to hope, even if that is ALL we have to hold on to.

Helplessness is NOT hopelessness, please remember that!!!!! I can see there are a lot of people on here who may be having similar feelings that I am right now, feeling very alone, anxious, depression, despair, the what the hell am I living for attitude, I GET it!!!!!! My stupid hands are shaking writing this. This is no time to be giving up. Things are always the darkest before the dawn. I am trying to give you the pep talk that I would want someone else to give to me. Even if you are at rock bottom, at least you're looking up. Don't be fooled by everything you see and hear right now. And if you don't have any friends or anyone you really feel you can talk to, know that that is not necessarily any reflection on you or that you're doing anything wrong. Believe in yourself!!!! Get tough. Believe that we are going to get through these dark times because we have to. If we go down, we're going down swinging. Stop being online all day, put your phone or your computer down, and go do something good for yourself. I'm going to go take a shower that I've been putting off for a few days. I will check back on here later. I hope this helped someone on here reading this. If it has, please let me know. Whoever you are, I am on your side. 💖

[Gadzukes]

Thanks for the pep talk. I’ve been trying to tell myself that everyday. Most days it doesn’t work though lol

[Marysblue]

Yes!

[Greenswimmer13]

Thank you! That was encouraging and I can definitely relate. I feel like I’m on rock bottom and don’t know why I’m here anymore.

[bonkers65]

Thanks for encouraging us to be hopeful.

[Hidden]

Thanks folks. I just had some kind of panic attack taking a shower. I felt like I was drowning and I started shaking. I'm okay now, but that was weird since taking a shower usually relaxes me. Guess my nerves are on edge.

[FifLove in reply to Hidden]

Are you feeling any better now?

[Hidden in reply to FifLove]

Thank you for asking. I FINALLY went to an urgent care place and they gave me some Cogentin so my hands don't shake. But they only gave me enough for 3 days and I have to talk to this psychiatrist again about it. Ugghh!!!! I've got to call him tomorrow. I really don't like him, he's from some foreign country where he has this weird accent and voice. I think HE sounds mentally ill sometimes. At least I feel less anxious.

[FifLove in reply to Hidden]

I’m glad you’re feeling a bit better. It’s unfortunate that we’re often dependent on people that make our anxiety worse. Sometimes reaching out for help adds to my anxiety, which in turn deters me from reaching out. Sometimes we must do it though. Please continue to take care of yourself, and reach out anytime.

[NickieLane in reply to Hidden]

my psychiatrist was Indian. If I didn’t say the right things about how I’m feeling she would threaten to dismiss me. So basically I had to lie on how I was feeling. When COVID started she stopped seeing patients in person. So it was video chats. She said she would no longer give me my meds because she did not like that my neurologist treated me for migraines with Botox. She said my neurologist was trying to kill me and she couldn’t put her practice in danger if I die. I begged her to reconsider. I’ve suffered from migraines with aura since I was 13. Botox gave me my life back because before every time I got nervous about something I would have an instant migraine and loss my vision for an hour. I had to drop out of college because when a test was passed out a migraine came on.. I eventually just tried to get my vision back and deal with it. I went in law enforcement and when I met a neurologist during a health fair I got relief from 15 migraines a month to 6 migraines. The blue lights from my patrol often triggered a migraine. But like all medications they eventually don’t have the effect when you first them unless your doctor ups the dose. My insurance wont approve a higher dose. So my neurologist gives me samples of the newest and las test migraine medications. If I could get my anxiety and depression under control I think I could feel like a brand new person! No anti depressant has ever worked for me. A mood stabilize Abilify helped a little but I gained 60 pounds. I found out that mood stabilizers cause your fat cells to grow. I went off it and lost all my weight. So now I know I probably need it and deal with the weight.

[Hidden]

Hi I love this post. Hold on to hope! We will get through this. You will get through this. I hope you’re feeling better.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, I am doing better now. Got my hands to stop shaking because I'm taking Cogentin for that. I've been lying in bed too much. Time to be more active tomorrow. Thank you for commenting on my post.

[Cacher21]

I love this. I needed to hear it