What have you been holding back on dumping from your brain 🧠?
What do you want or need to let go of and for some reason cannot. Add your own category.
What would make you go phew! I'm letting it go in the garbage 🗑️ can of life?
What have you been holding back on dumping from your brain 🧠?
What do you want or need to let go of and for some reason cannot. Add your own category.
What would make you go phew! I'm letting it go in the garbage 🗑️ can of life?
My intense fear of people dying
Brilliant bravo bravo frickubg oooooooo
Cheering jumoing upmand down.
Thanks for sharing Brig. Hope you are well my friend 😊
Good you dumped! 🗑️🚮Be well Brig 😊🌈🤗🌞
Because they are compelled
Not due to an illness
Brig you never cease to amaze me with your intelligence.
u know more than i........its an injustice what they do to people.......they are simple reacting just as the people who went through the great depression are frugal......not hard to understand.........those who have both parents lecture to tohers whats the problem.......they havent expereced loss........and cal the ...........but actually those who have lost........hang on to other tighter.........and peopel go what thehellow is going on...............yeesh...........a normal reactoin tp losses and learning..........what loss is about........not a abnoraml category is some stupid book...........all reglions allow for greiefign................oh except psych where theyu get pills and abnormal labeling..................ah ever hearof a wake>..........we have more sense than psych dept..................loss and greif the fip side of caring heart...............leave them the frick alone psych mepoe get lost.........leave mhyfiends alone
I really don't like this feeling but mine is anger, it's the way people have been behaving through this pandemic. If people were sensible and used common sense there wouldn't be so many cases.
Definitely. You know something..I wrote similar and erased it. This whole year was worse than it should've been and yes it makes me angry because some people are that dumb. "It won't happen to me". Want to bet"? I hear you. It held me back and we lost too many good people. 🙋👍
Anger is very important to express because it turns to Depression/makes it worse
You needn't have erased it but I get why you did. I've held back on here about how I feel regarding the way people behave but I'm really pleased you posted this as it's given me the opportunity to say this. You are right people are dumb and have the mindset it won't happen to me.
Thank you and you're right,inward anger isn't good.
Thank you 🙏💜💜 xx
Will someone pleeeeeese. Listen to MS luna??
will somene pllleeeee listen to this woman>
Kind of you Brig 😊
luna..........no offense or i have decent hearing...........not to invade peoples space or shut them off.............feel so bad for them because certian peopel in my family never grieved when i was in need or gone...............veruss otehrs who greive.u .......the later are my her=os............because they dared to lvoe............dared to care and have real intessne soul scrreaming losses..............they are the heros v the rocks...........no they never greieve.................they also never care if your dead or not
The worst ones in our area are the students, are they taught how far 2 mtrs. is. We used to go and meet friends at the shops, I have a husband, but a couple of them live alone. When we went at 12.30 it was so busy, we try to sit on benches social distancing. But we had to go an hour later to avoid the crowds. None wear masks and none avoid touching. I am sure they are all together don;t care. We are all over 60. Now it is zone 4 we can not even do that, I hope all this ends soon. We did not even see our grand children at Xmas. Rant over Sorry.
You're definitely correct in that. It happened here over the summer with beach barbecues, summer parties and still happens at the mall. Our Governor was caught on camera in a restaurant without mask while she was supposed to be in quarantine because the state doc she'd been in contact with daily caught Covid. If she's not taking it seriously why should they? Most people with common sense followed what we were supposed to do. I agree with you 👍
You can rant as much as you like as some people are driving me nuts. It's a mixture between the young and the older ones where I am. I'm also in my 60's and am finding my age group and older just as bad. When I was in Morrisons near me a few weeks back I asked a woman, who, I would say, was in her 60's, to give me space. She retorted 'you are being over the top, we are all wearing masks. She said she was in a hurry and I said I don't care if you're in a hurry, this is real, we need to be careful. She was quite angry in her response.
Let it out guy's. Brain dump it here.
Before I even clicked on the image and saw what was in the bottom right-hand corner, I was going to say "Sorrow."
I want to let go of all of this sadness. I have cried more in the past 12 months than in any other year that I have been alive. It weighs so heavily on my heart, I can actually feel it pushing on my chest.
I want to rid myself of this sorrow so that I can better focus on all of the positives in my life and appreciate how incredibly lucky I am.
I'm sorry CJasmin. I hear you. Is this because of COVID I'm guessing? It's been an awfully sad year. So you made a great head start by saying it and writing the words to it. That's huge progress. I'm going to throw this out and say start making that positive's list that you want to get started on. It's a process and you've started that process. You can do this. 👍🤗🌈🌞🌟Let's all ok get going on what we want to.
Big Hugs 🤗
Covid, job loss due to discrimination against my medical condition, harassment, isolation, financial stresses, health insurance screw ups, heartbreak... all the fun stuff 😬
But that is a fantastic idea-- Make a list of positives! Quite a few things come to mind, but I'm forgetful so having things written down will make this process easier ☺️ Thank you! ❤️
Oh boy are we a lot alike. Been there. Glad you are now in the process of tossing these trashable items. I have to make lists too. If I have no pen handy I text myself
Another smart idea! Thank you thank you 🤗❤️
Anytime you want to chat I'm here, except for doctors appts or telehealth for my medical stuff too. Hugs 🤗
Unexpressed emotions get stuck within us
Anger at old friends who didn’t have my back. Discouragement from my last job where I didn’t fit in and lost a lot of hope that I’d ever find something I can stand doing for work. Fear of my grandparents & my dog dying. Procrastinating my whole life.
I hear you about old friends, I'm sorry 😐. That stinks when you think someone's loyal and they're not. You look you will find your niche in the work you want to do. Sometimes it takes a while. You can do it. Oh boy fear of losing your dog and your grandparents dying I hear your sadness loud and clear. Spread love to your grandparents and your dog as much as you can while they are here. Day by day. The future isn't here we only have this moment.
If you need to talk I'm here. Private Message me. I've lost my grandparents, 5 dogs, my beloved hero my brother, and several aunts uncles and cousins.
I LOVE LOVE YOUR CREATIVE WRITING ❤️🌈🌟🌞🌺
Massive love shots for rescuers. Who lost so much
Fear of failure, fear of being average, fear of happiness cos it's misleading. Fear of familiarity of place, people things ( this one is gonna need at least a two month therapy service to talk about).
Sure I understand. You've got great insight into your needs. Are you in therapy?
🤗 HUGS 🤗
No am not, nor am I on any meds.
Okay. Do you want to be?
Yeah... Therapy for sure but the meds, not really. I just want to feel well for even a bit except I don't know how to go about that. People around me aren't very supportive. Granted, I have never let anyone know how bad it could get.
You can look up Therapist',s through Psychology Today therapyfinder.com. Just put your ZIP code in. I believe it's world wide. You don't have to go on meds that's your decision. You know if you're suicidal please please tell someone to get help. It will leave your family and friends forever in trauma and distress. People do care and love you although Depression and Anxiety mess with our brains and tell us other
I am very angry and disappointed at president I just had to get this out of my chest I am so sick and tired of reading the news hearing him complain about the election results I honestly am ashamed of America and what it has become it has become a more divided place
Amen. I am ashamed too, but hopeful... Hopeful that it won't always be this way. And later this month, we will really be able to take out the trash 👍
Heck yeah I hope I don’t upset anyone by saying this 💜
You know I'm here if things go down 😉
I too am ashamed of the direction our country has gone. You are not alone in your feelings. And if other people feel differently they have a right to their opinion too. That’s why this space is so great. We can express ourselves freely without being attacked!
That is true ❤️
I really want to dump my brain of health anxiety. It is ruining my life. I’m at a cross roads...do I forge ahead and stay off of meds or do I give in and go back on them? It’s a crappy place to be.
You're at am impasse. Which way do you go. While I'm not under any authority to answer that you should talk with your doctor. It's your decision. Best of luckXx
Could I just put the bin on my head have a meeting with a padded cell and slowly for the next 24hrs bang my head in the bin against the wall please
You can't bang your head against the bin that will hurt you. However we get creative with padded walls Yes! As long as everything is padded and you won't hurt yourself and just one question ❓ Can I join you ❓I got me lots of purging to do LoL 😆
Yer come in,I’ve plenty of crayons to get creative with.
I don’t feel pain when banging my self usually.
I thought you were going to say no way man.you will hurt the bin lol
To Draw in padded cell silly lol.
Of course it would be padded other wise you hurt your self lol.
Oh I didn’t tell you I had put foam padding in the bin.
I just like to look at life out of the box in to the bin lol
Hello peeps! I totally agree 100% with all the things that have already been mentioned so I won’t repeat them, but I do wish to dump them here, please and thanks lol. 🤓🙏
Honestly, I think I could print this page out, and fill each one of these circles completely full with the OUTRAGEOUSLY OVERWHELMING amount of stuff that swirls around in my head all day! 🤯
Matter of fact, I think I’ll do just that! (provided it allows me to print it of course) but I’m really thinking this could be quite therapeutic for me. 😊
I’ll use as many different colors as I possibly can of pens, pencils, crayons, markers, whatever I can find, and I’ll just “dump” everything that comes to mind and then just let it go! Simply saying those words is already reducing some of my stress!
It’s so easy for me to forget sometimes that worrying never helps anything, and it actually causes a great deal of harm, if we let it consume us.
So much of my energy I have wasted stressing about things I am unable to control, despite my knowing that I can only change things that I am able to control. Rumination and overthinking can be such a grueling process. 🤕
This idea of having a monthly, weekly, or perhaps even daily, “brain dumping”and “taking out the trash” to let it go, is absolutely wonderful! Not to mention critically necessary for our well-being!
Thank you so much for sharing this today. I think this will be something I can turn in to a regular habit, which is what I desperately need.
I’m trying to make self-care one of my top priorities this year, and to remind myself to do a quick mental check-in at least once everyday, which (in theory) will gradually begin to reduce some of the overwhelm. 🤞🙏
💙SELF-CARE 💙needs to become a main priority in all of our lives, (especially with everything going on in the world today), otherwise we just won’t be able to survive and adapt accordingly.
Besides, we all know if WE don’t do it ourselves, it definitely won’t get done! (At least, that’s how it seems to work around here anyway.) 😏
Once again, thanks so much for sharing this!
I love it!
I sometimes write them down and rip them very therapeutic 😄 of course I go crazy with ripping 😂😂
Oh, I loved your reply!!! Where you'd get "peeps"? One of my nick-names no longer in use!
I’m not really sure why I chose that specific way to say hello today.
I guess I was just thinking I wanted to say hello to all my fellow Health Unlocked people (or “peeps”) and it just felt like the right thing to say at the time so I just went with it! 🤣
Glad you liked my reply, I appreciate you saying that so thank you. 🙏
I must admit though, now you’ve got me curious, 🤔 (and if you don’t mind me asking of course..if you do just disregard no big deal)
How did you get that nickname peeps? And what meaning does it hold for you?
Hi blueorganic!!!It's in the wee hours of the early morning here...excuse any mistakes.
When my brother was very young, having the usual toddler difficulties learning how to pronounce words, we were waiting for my mother in a big department store.
All of the sudden I heard a little one crying, "Pee-Pee!!! Pee-Pee!!! For some reason little Mike got turned around and thought I wasn't with him.
I had a fit!!! Told him, "You can't call me that!!!!"
He looked at me and simply said, "K, Peep!!"
My parents and other close relatives immediately began calling me 'Peep'.
My parents were constantly taking in adults, tweens, teens...the 'family' constellation consistently changed. My sister said no to 'Peep' and yes to 'Bo'. She's called me Bo forever. And it stuck...everyone started calling me Bo. It's my name now.
Little Bo Peep 🤣
I always shortened the word people for peeps after hearing it somewhere..
How do you so consistently come up with these Posts????OK..fear, adipose tissue cells, disappointment, sadness, depression, anxiety, the occational bout with OCD, grief, some memories, nightmares, some old ugly clothes, some ugly old shoes that hurt, hurt feelings, missing and longing for all my Rainbow Lane dogs, unresolved issues, times of depersonalization, stuff I have that's half completed...you really want me to continue?
Fear that people will leave because of my mental illnesses. My depression and GAD has driven some people away in the past because its too much. Now I try to remind myself that the people who are meant to be in my life understand that I'm sick, and will be there for me.
I can understand that. I get afraid that I drive people away too. Just be yourself, no matter what anyone says.💖
This really resonates with me right now.
This post stood out to me. It’s one of my fears. I feel like the more I aim to work on myself or the more others know about my anxiety, the fewer people I have in my life. I’m sure part of it is me staying away from those who I feel haven’t had my best interest at heart in the past. I’m starting to think it’s time to meet a whole new set of people because there’s people out there who may genuinely want me and you to do well and be happy. You deserve to be surrounded by people who care and want the best for you.
I know it may not feel like it, but there are people out there who will be there for you. I just recently discovered what true friendship feels like. My friend knows about my mental illnesses and wants to be there for me. It took me a long time to find that kind of unconditional support and love.
That's a loyal friend...a keeper
Yes. She was there one day when I had a major anxiety attack in a restaurant and knew something was wrong. We left the restaurant and just talked for hours. She's also been there when I've been in the middle of depressive episodes, and knows that at my worst I often have suicidal ideation. I'm grateful every day that she sees these dark parts of me, and loves me just the same.
Exactly. Loyalty in friends and family comes to light very heavily in these situations. Blood is NOT thicker than water either. Family doesn't mean they hold loyalty. Sometimes friends are more than family and family becomes toxic.
God is that true!!!! And there are always certain people in immediate and extended family that you get along with better than others.
Yes!!! such toxic thinking to think otherwise. Friends can easily take the place of family members as far as loyalty.
So true! A couple of my friends are more supportive and caring them some of my family members. They understand that these are illnesses that I can't just "get over". They were there when I was diagnosed with depression and GAD and when I started medication to help manage these illnesses.
I completely agree! Family ties sometimes are what’s toxic. Family members, I feel, says this to make someone feel obligated to them in some way. In a way it’s manipulative and unhealthy for both you and them.
I can totally relate to this!
(Side note: If you’re short on time, I totally get it and I feel ya, so feel free to skip to the last 2 or 3 paragraphs for the moral of the story. I promise I won’t be mad lol. 😊)
Ok. I have always had issues with fear of abandonment for one reason or another, but definitely even more so now that I am fully aware of my mental illness and the impact it can, and often does, have on my relationships.
When I look back over the years, I wonder just how many people I may have unintentionally allowed my anxiety and depression to push away. Family, friends, boyfriends, coworkers, roommates, classmates, it’s hard to say I’m afraid. 😔
I can say this, I am now 42 and I have exactly 2 people I would consider my real friends, and it can often be a constant struggle trying to maintain my relationships with those!
(It would’ve been 3 friends, but about 2 months ago, someone who I thought was my true friend, and had been since all the way back in grade school, was given an opportunity to stand up for me and have my back. Sadly, with very little to no hesitation, she chose to turn her back on me instead. I was very upset, shocked, and hurt, but I’m glad now that it happened because it allowed her true colors to shine right when I needed her the most, and they weren’t pretty at all, and I don’t need friends like that. I’m way better off without them in fact.)
Relationships of any kind are a struggle, but when you start throwing anxiety, depression, ADHD, or any other health issues for that matter in to the mix, you are definitely putting fuel on the fire!
Unfortunately, sometimes that does end up pushing them away, which is actually understandable for me to a certain extent.
(Now hear me out on this for a second before you go getting all upset with me lol.)
We all know that trying to cope with mental illness is not easy. In fact, more often than not it truly sucks, but if I were given the option to just walk away from it and that’s all I had to do in order to live the rest of my life free from it, I think I definitely would! Wouldn’t you?
I don’t know, maybe others don’t feel that way or agree with me on that, and that’s ok. I’m sure it could quickly turn in to a heated debate with good points on both sides of the argument. But my point here is, I guess I just feel that in a way, I can’t say I would really blame them for not wanting to deal with it, if they actually had the choice, because I don’t think I would want to either, if I had been given a choice. Does that make sense?
(Hope I haven’t offended anyone by saying that as it was not my intention and I apologize.)
In looking at it from this perspective, I was better able to realize how hard it must be for them to cope with as well, and how much it really shows their love and level of care, by choosing day in and day out, to stay with me and continue to help me fight my illness, despite the fact that I have, no doubt completely destroyed their last possible nerve!
I will even find myself second-guessing my true feelings, and trying to determine if they are actually legitimate concerns, or if I’m just having a difficult time regulating my emotions and being hypersensitive (very common with ADHDers like myself), or perhaps I’m once again unknowingly allowing my mental illness to take control of my thoughts and emotions and push the people I love away?
I’ve only got a few loved ones left, and I definitely don’t want to jeopardize my relationships with them and risk the chance of losing the only people who truly care about me and love me, despite all of my utter craziness! 🤪
(Bless their souls! 😇 These people are extremely hard to come by.)
Needless to say, this tends to be an ongoing process in my head in which I am actually fighting with myself, yet also against myself at the same time, 🤔 and not knowing which to believe or what to do, ending in an inevitable state of total confusion (or what some may call insanity! 🤣), which by this time, I have added a major headache to as well. 🤯🤕🤦🏻♀️💩
Not sure why it somehow took ALL of THAT, for me to basically say THIS:
I also live in constant fear! Fear that my inability to control my mental illness symptoms effectively, will push away the only loved ones I have left in my life.
And if there’s anything that 2020 taught me the most, it is just how precious, yet fleeting, our lives truly are, and how important it is for us to do our very best to stay positive, and make the most of every single moment we are given.
Therefore, I would also like to
DUMP MY FEARS HERE PLEASE. 🗑🗑
Thanks a bunch! 🙏
Ok. Novel over. Lol.
I'm 57 and I have 2 loyal friends. That's ok because it's not how many you have it's the quality. You're doing well. Now dump the rest if you're ready! 🗑️🗑️🗑️ You're allowed to use as many trash cans as you want. Another note , I don't think it's ever okay for a friend to walk away from friendship no matter what you are doing through.
I totally understand where you are coming from. Like I said, I only have a couple friends that I can really trust with understanding my mental illnesses.
I also wonder how many people I’ve unintentionally pushed away before I was fully aware of my GAD and depression. Before my official diagnoses, everyone always told me that I was “just a worrier”. I would also have these episodes of sadness and darkness as a kid that I didn’t understand. Obviously later realizing that those were early depressive episodes.
Mental illness is a lot for anyone to handle. I just try to remember to be thankful for the people in my life who stay and are supportive.
I hear you. Back then worrying was considered a normal behavior or how I am. Now that I’m older I realize it wasn’t normal. I was displaying signs of GAD and depression.
Mental illness is a lot as well as I can say an invisible illness in my case and mental illness but think this. Would you leave your friend? I tend to think not. I would not either.
I feel like some people are afraid or uncomfortable when they hear about mental illness so they cope by staying away/avoiding it. It’s disappointing and hurtful when this happens. Sometimes they may want to help but don’t know how. Either way, those that are still around are ones who are ready to provide support.
You know I have to say the word 'mental illness' bothers me. It's old school.
No worries. What do you prefer it being called?
The word mental needs to be something different...to me it denotes negativity. Idk what I'd prefer it be called i would have to think. .
Taking things personally. Severed connections. Missed opportunities. Then feelings of loneliness, fear, shame...all compounded into psychological isolation. It seems so far away now that I am willing to let go
Thanks for coming up with another awesome post!
In addition to at least one on the list, I would add shame and insecurity.
I have some history I want to dump.
I am trying to tell the difference between being in a state of self-pity and a state of grieving.
Yes, 2020 was horrendous, major car accident (4 broken bones and rotator cuff), job gone, COVID isolation, but this stems back a lot farther.
I have never had a dream, but I thought I was good at my job and it ended up a disaster because my anxiety, depression, shame, guilt...whatever it was... controlled me. I have worked so hard to understand it all and I have a cognizant understanding of what I need to do, but I can't settle it with my heart and move forward.
God, I need to move forward!
Yes and you can. We cannot go 🔙 back and thinking about it frustrates us. You can do this. Make a list of what your goals are and go for it. We are all behind you!! Start moving forward. Baby steps.. get the resume updated and copied. There's an excellent book on Amazon re nailing interviews and do you think I can think of it now? Course not but I'll go on amazon and look. * I will text myself a note to make this happen. *
You can do this one step at a time. 🐢🐢🐢. Take it slow get your ducks 🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆 in a row. Lol.
I was a teacher for 20+ years, now trying to reinvent myself. I started with positive character traits. When I do my affirmations, I feel like I am lying to myself.
Oh no you have to start believing in your traits. You're definitely not lying to yourself you're changing an old habit. That takes time.
Depression and Anxiety twist our brains and lie. At least you are doing your affirmations. Think about the fact that depression and Anxiety mess with your brain. Cognitive behavioral therapy is what you are doing for yourself. Changing your thinking. Just add in "I believe my affirmations"
Z - ALL OF THE ABOVE!!!!!
especially sorrow... but i have so much not sure your can is big enough....
i'd be alot better if i could dump all the others....
not sure i'm ready to let go of all the sorrow yet.... it's all i have left...
they don't call it sweet sorrow for nothin... how the he!! can something hurt like F*K, and yet be soooo f'g sweet.
or maybe i'm just twisted.... (probably C- all of the above again)
You're definitely not twisted you're normal. You can move on..it's a process we all struggle with. I have many garbage 🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️🗑️ cans , my cans are your cans!!!
i may well be normal... but i'm def also twisted!! (in good ways)
ty, i know i can... but clearly part of me doesn't want to...
dunno what that means.... actually i DO know what it means...
it means that i should open myself to pain all over again - in order to risk "living" again. i know this is the right answer to live a fulfilling life.
but in the end. i'm scared. of doing that pain again - even tho i know it's the only way to live.
i have to decide to "dare greatly; and step back in the arena".
i'm the only one stopping me.
Luna_child you have inspiring posts. They’re uplifting and encourage self-reflect. I don’t log on that often but when I come across your posts, they empower me to want to work on myself. Thanks for your posts!
I’ve been stuck for months now on taking space from a childhood friend. I considered this person my best friend, and spent the past 2 years in the same friend group as them. The trust for me in this friendship is gone. I was completely vulnerable and open with this person, and now I regret that looking back. I want to let go of this sadness since the situation stands unresolved.
With the pandemic, I haven’t been able to establish new friendships and so I am faced often with this void of not knowing who to talk to. I knew it would be lonely to separate my life from this person, and it feels like shit to be the one on the outside, but I also know I should trust my instincts and that listening to this person caused me a lot of harm this year.
I want to let this go and move on, but it’s hard to do when most of this year has felt so stuck.
This falls into sorrow, anger, fear and discouragement.
Moonrose999 I had the same problem with a friend I was very close with for years and years since the 7th grade. It was toxic. Everyone is feeling stagnant right now and are stuck with moving forward. Trust me, you are not the only one.
🤗 Hugs and please hang on even though our frustrations grow there will be an end to this madness.
I always learn so much from you guy's sharing your stories. We learn from each other. We need to stick together.. 👍😊❤️💜💪👫👬👭
Keep that dump list growing. We are not finished. Keep adding even if you answered already you know you can come and add more. I know I need to after this insomniac gets some rest from being awake all night. Need to doze a while. I got some family toxic stuff to add later.
A fear of dying
Fear of certain things being damaged or 'ruined'
Fear of putting all the weight I lost back and what people would think
Fear of my sports team losing badly and being embarrassed
Yes I hear you as I think most people do. Fear of dying is very common. What is it exactly about dying that makes you fearful? I'm not afraid of dying I'm afraid of living if that makes sense. So many of us worry about what others think and it took me a long time to process this. To a degree we all have some of this depending if it's a Boss, etc..but if it's your neighbor or others like family, it's def one that's been brought up so many times that we don't have control over them but we can change our thinking in the way we react like for example I was bullied here on this forum. I left so upset. After working through it in therapy I no longer honestly could give one stink hole as to what they think. If people are judging you and not working on themselves, they are jealous. You're doing something right. All the more motivation to work on your goals. It's wasted time worrying about other people's thoughts of you. Interesting why they'd be curious as to what's going on in your life whole they should be worried about their own.
Notice I came back despite the bully's which does occur. Ignore. Poof! One of them made peace ✌️ and we are good. Then I found a few of them on a post chatting about me like they knew me which they said they did. They said they knew me well. Funny I never met them saw them spoke to them and live in a different country. Another reached out because I didn't respond to a reply. Tough. You get what you ask for. She then apologized for calling me a name on a post I readily accepted her apology hands down. Last message was me asking how her holidays were. No response. So, twin faces. My advice, think none of what others think. It's garbage talk. Throw it away. You can do this!
I don't know really I was more scared as a child. I remember crying at night thinking about one day dying - the only way to reassure myself was hoping science would invent something to make us immortal by the time I was old. I still don't really want to die, but I don't want to be in my eighties either if my memory and my marbles have gone.
What can you pinpoint about death scares you? Pain, unknown, missing loved ones left behind? If you were a child thinking of this can you think of anything that could have brought this on? Loss of someone?
Well I am not certain but I think it comes from a near death or traumatic experience I had as a child when I can remember playing inside a button up bed cover then finding I was stuck and feeling like I was running out of air. That's the only thing I can think may have led to my realisation about death.
I think you just figured it out my friend. That's pretty scary and traumatic for a kid. For anybody. So you have figured it out of it wouldn't have come to mind. Are you ready to trash 🗑️ it?
Well, I have mentioned it my parents and they do not remember it so I don't know if maybe it is a false memory!? But I am ready to trash it.
🗑️🗑️🗑️ For you. Just a note when I talk with my mom or dad re: certain situations most times they don't remember. Dump away my friend 🗑️🗑️🗑️
So many things I would love to throw in the dumpster. Probably the most important is having no self esteem. Even the slightest mistake brings up years of comments that I wasn't pretty, was fat and so on. I'd love to get a dumpster for my house too. There are so many things I don't use or need. Things my children left behind, clothes that don't fit, decorations I no longer use. I have been trying to get rid of things but it's overwhelming. I also have a hard time throwing things away because I grew up in poverty.
Well there are so many people in need right now bagging those unused items would bring someone much happiness. I just heard about an expectant woman who lived in a duplex which caught fire and 2 little girls loss their lives, the other family, and this young woman who's expecting lost everything. Can you imagine? So bagging unused items would bring a family much happiness. Self esteem is letting go of the past all those things people said to you were bullying you and who are they and how are they feeling when they look in the mirror at how they treat people. It's letting go of the past and I struggle to., My self esteem is in the toilet most times I feel pretty bad having a tough time dumping it. Why don't we say you and I make a list of what was said to us and then bury it somewhere? It's a process I'm not saying it'll happen overnight but I'm willing to be your self esteem buddy and do this with you.
That is a wonderful idea. I would love a self esteem buddy. And I have been bagging and boxing things. I know there will be more people in need because of the pandemic.
Plus there's been so many house fires common this time of year. Domestic Violence shelter's with kids...all kinds of places. So we'll make a list which we'll make when we think of something said that made out self esteem plummet, and we'll be chat buddies and chat about it then we'll talk about reversing the nasty words into positive. I have so much to purge.
I can’t let go of this guy I dated when quarantine first began. I can’t get over the way he made me feel, his charm, his warm embrace, us joking about each other’s weird likes such as ASMR, our late night talks through out the night, me venting to him about not fitting in and the reassurance he gave me, keeping him company through his shifts, him calling me out when I didn’t respond to his texts, him randomly offering me money although I declined he would offer to pay my gas for the commute to see him, and just the overall feeling of stability I saw at one point with him. I still think about him everyday and I just needed to get that off my chest. I still am very much in love with someone who has left me out here on my own. Someone who never loved me to begin with. I was just convenient to him at that moment in time and I’m still trying to accept that there’s still good that has came out of it. The garbage can have this now 🗑
I'm so sorry. What happened? Did he ghost you? Just leave without telling you? What a complete jerk. Yes, garbage can for him, I'll say. Same thing happened to me. Just add lying, chatting with others and he was supposed to divorce. Kudo's garbage 🗑️🗑️ can for him. I would rather enjoy my friends or my dogs company. It sounds like he enjoyed your company but couldn't commit or was married.
I'm glad you have garbage canned him. I've lost some trust in men after an abusive marriage to which was recently finalized and that other jerk.
There are lots of others
He considered committing but was very hesitant about it and so I never wanted to proceed with making it official. I drew the line when he didn’t show up when I needed him to (on my birthday) and asked him if he was wasting my time and he answered “wow that’s a good question” ha. Although we know we dodged bullets, the memories are still there and it’s still hurtful no matter how much they made it clear they weren’t committed to the relationship it’s tough.. I know. But I’m super glad you chose to do things your way. I can’t imagine how painful a divorce is but I know for my oldest sister it was a big relief.
On your birthday?! Wow..he got the message across that day. Coward he be. 😶. You're better off without him. I think you know that however I know, I have felt it too, the pain.
Big 🤗🤗 Hugs
He always showed when it wasn’t important or convenient for him. but some men are so good at still convincing you that you are a priority. Till reality hits you in the face like it did for me 😆 thank you Luna 🤍
They are master's. They wrote the book. Most not all. There are some amazing men out there.
Sounds like it was difficult for him too, sometimes people leave, not because they feel too little, but because they feel too much.
hi ellaalexandra thank for your input, i think that's an interesting thought. what part made it seem like it was difficult for him? i'm curious because he seemed to move on very quickly.
He considered committing. Your story sounds like people who are in love. His honest answer to your question whether he was wasting your time. My own hesitation to commit, even though I love someone. Spending very special moments with people who couldnt commit to me, but clearly we had something special
How many women has he done this to? Mmmmm? Wonder if he's married
Luna_Child he was only 1 year older (26) and he lived with his guy roomie. we've been to one another's place and i never got the vibe he was married because how often we saw one another and the constant sleep overs and pictures he sent me when he was working at the dealership all day. but i dont have any doubts that many married men specifically wont commit as well. they are the sneakiest of them all. IMO. but i knew there were girls he gave some attention to. As sick as it sounds, at the time i didn't care because i knew he was a very attractive person, i was focused more on exams, and he was treating me good in other ways and gave me more effort than I thought anyone would during the first 3 months. the last month, was just terrible. I'm sure your marriage was similar luna_child, abuse came more towards the end?
and EllaAlexandra i understand commitment can be scary for anyone. But we were in such a smitten infatuated state, i thought he would comfort me more than that because i cried after that while he just layed there.. ill never forget the heartache i felt imagining a future without him. your response shows how much you can relate, so thank you. moments can be so special, and you never want them to end.. but moments like that will never be absolute.
I hate this intense fear of death, my death especially. (not trying to sound selfish, just real) 😢😭
Bluej ,That's not selfish at all in fact many people mentioned that as a fear. What is it exactly, I was trying to pinpoint this with someone else, about death that scares you? Fear of the unknown, pain, unaware of how you'll pass, which nobody knows, missing and worrying about others when you pass? I think we need to bring this out in the open to all talk about it. Once people talk about it the fear may decrease.
My fear of failure
My sense of not being worthy of love or affection
My intrusive or self-made thoughts that I’m not worthy of forgiveness
...thinking I’m ugly or that I’ll never find love thanks to my scars
Jay, thank you for sharing. Let's try and think of brain dumping this because you are very worthy Jay. Scars are just marks they don't tell a story about who you are. I remember we had talked about this before by getting Dermablend Cover to cover your scars. Lots of men use it too it's not just for women. I have surgery scars everywhere and people can like it or leave it because it's what's inside that counts. Who you are. Let's trash 🗑️ whatever you are ready to trash and start replacing negative thoughts with positive self talk. Xx
(Wanted to throw some multiple times ;))
Thank you for this dustbin
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