self-harm its good (?): hi, i know the... - Anxiety and Depre...

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self-harm its good (?)

melTK profile image

hi, i know the tittle it's strange haha, but it's how i think it is, self-harm doesn't help you to much, it's only to leave scars, but i dont think that, for me, i feel releave, i feel good (?, idk how to express how i feel about that but cutting help me in the way that i feel less anxious and sad, i know that its not the best thing to do but i cant do anything, my bad thoughts take power of me and I can't do anything about it. :[]

- mel <3

(and sorry english its not my first language ): )

13 Replies

cutting may feel good and relieves stress at first, but there are so many other non harmful ways to cope. have you ever tried art therapy or poetry?

melTK profile image
melTK in reply to langedechu

no, school its been so difficult for me and i dont have time to do anything else :(

langedechu profile image
langedechu in reply to melTK

school takes up sooo much time so i feel you. this is sort of an odd question but at what time of day do you tend to cut? or does it vary?

melTK profile image
melTK in reply to langedechu

I almost always do it in the afternoons (around 6-7 pm) but I rarely do it at night because no one is awake and I don't have to worry about being discovered

langedechu profile image
langedechu in reply to melTK

ah, i tend to do it at night cuz that's just when all the negativity hits... but anyways, some other things you can do instead of cutting include ripping paper, crying (no this is not a joke, like, let it out!), or talking to someone about it. having a friend you can trust can really be helpful. cutting is a short term solution to a long term problem and just chatting about what's bothering you might actually solve your issues (through the listener's advice) rather than just making you feel good for a bit. it's like drugs, they make you feel good but really do nothing to solve the situation. if that makes sense.

melTK profile image
melTK in reply to langedechu

i understand and thank u :'( for answer me and giving me solutions and tips to not cutting <3 really :( thank u

langedechu profile image
langedechu in reply to melTK

of course! always here to help. hypercat54 gave some great advice too! best of luck. love, lange

Pinkie56 profile image
Pinkie56 in reply to langedechu

hypercat always has the best advise.

Cutting is not sustainable over time. We had a member here who just did small cuts but had done so many over time that one time the flesh on her arm all parted and she had to go to the hospital to get it seen too. It damages not only the skin but the deeper tissue inside.The other reason is you will have to live with the scars forever. Remember you won't be 17 forever and one day hopefully you will get your issues sorted. This probably doesn't worry you now but it will in the future. I know from experience.

There are lots of better ways to deal with your pain so have a look online and on Youtube. You also need to seek therapy as well. Is this possible? Time isn't an issue so please no excuses like that! You can't afford not to take the the time and trouble to seek professional help.

If you are still at school do you have a school counsellor? Are your parents aware of what you are doing? Please seek proper help.

melTK profile image
melTK in reply to hypercat54

Hi, I know that cutting has its disadvantages and I went to therapy, but in the end it was all for nothing, and it was my fault, because I have this problem that I can't tell anyone what I have because I don't want help, and I don't know why, I don't know what I have that I'm afraid to say what's wrong with me, but in reallity, It's because I don't want help, I don't want anyone to know what I have because I'm afraid of what they'll say about me, what they'll think about me, I don't know how my parents will react, besides I'm depressed and everything is much worse, I'm failing in my school (I may repeat a year) I have insomnia, very low self-esteem, I am going through the worst and I know that in the end it will consume me making me do something very stupid with my life but my bad thoughts and decisions take over, making me do things which make me bad, which I will suffer, yesterday I made a suicide letter because I felt that soon my life would end, because I do not know what to do with my life anymore, because I don't have a purpose but to die without having achieved anything in my life, ending up being the disappointment of my parents, ending up being a useless person with a shitty mentality who couldn't seek help, I'm in my worst moments and all I want is to die, I don't know what to do anymore, my parents don't know anything, they only knew when I cut myself for the first time at the age of 10 (I think) that's all

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply to melTK

dearest melTK, as you are seeing it's not the physical scars that are keeping you in this cycle of self harm but it's the deep emotional scar that keeps you repeating this behavior.

You've pointed out all the negative things in your life which lead you to wanting release.

No where do you see positivity in something. And of course, as long as you don't want help, it won't happen. Please continue using the forum for understanding and support

until you are ready to be honest and open with a therapist. They are not going to look down at you but help you find the root of this pattern in demeaning yourself which started at the age of 10. Something must have happened in your early life and only

a professional can help you go forward and not stay stuck in this destructive behavior.

I care :) xx

Pinkie56 profile image
Pinkie56 in reply to melTK

whoa whoa melTK! You are very articulate and intelligent. You have an amazing amount of potential. Please don't desert the future because today is crap. High school sucks for everyone. But its almost over. Be strong. Stand up tall. And face the day with the knowledge that you are smarter, stronger, and better than all this crap.

Your English is just fine. Better than some Americans. Self harm is an interesting phenomenon. While it does provide temporary relief (God only knows why but I suspect it has something to do with brain chemicals) self harm is a drug of sorts and that's not good. Only medically supervised medication will help coupled with talk therapy and maybe some lifestyle changes. But yes it does provide some relief. And plenty of scars. I carry those scars for over 30 yrs. Everytime I look at my arms I see a reminder of very dark days. But I also see just how strong I am in that I was able to pull myself out of that time hopefully a bit wiser. Is the glass half full or half empty? Mine is always half full and the best is yet to be.

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