Okay, so anyone that's been seeing my posts knows that I started a new job in April of 2019 and over the last few months things have gone so far downhill that I started having panic attacks, and I'm in therapy again for the first time in decades. I have a job interview at 4 (MST) and I'm not really nervous about it, but I am nervous about when they ask me why I want to leave. Obviously, I'll try to keep it short like "it's just not a good fit for me right now" or something, but then I go back to I've only been here for a little more than a year and a half and that won't look good on my resume. But I should be caring more about my current mental health than what my resume might look like, right?
I mean, since I've been here, three people have quit. Only one gave notice. One was the paralegal, with experience, that was hired a couple weeks before me. She quit in September of 2019, with no notice (they were treating her much like they are now treating me). The other girl that didn't give notice was a paralegal assistant who quit in like June, in the middle of the pandemic. That reflects poorly on the people I work for, right?
I just want to feel like it's okay for me to move on, even though part of me thinks it would be a failure on my part. Of course, there is also a chance I don't even get an offer for a new job, which would make all this worrying moot. UGH! Sorry for the long post, I'm just feeling everywhere this morning. Hope you all are well!
Written by
BluePeppermint
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
hey blue,it's normal to worry! at this point you've gone through so much and you need to give your brain a break. and remember self-affirmation! you'll do great! love, lange
Thanks again Lange! I'm trying to continue to tell myself "you got this girl. You have almost 20 years of experience" but it's so hard to get out of my own head!
even if you feel like you don't believe yourself, you should tell your negative thoughts that they are wrong and YOU DESERVE IT. but that's soo great that you've tried! and hey, if you don't get the job, it wasn't meant to be. there are so so so many more opportunities you can get and you WILL find the right path even if it takes time!
I once wanted to leave a toxic work environment and applied for another similar job (at what I hoped was a better organization). Obviously didn't want to badmouth my then current employer (even though they were objectively terrible). But the new job was at a nonprofit that I knew did wonderful work and the job I was leaving was a corporate law firm. So I was able to honestly talk about all the things I admired about the company I was applying to. If there's anything about the new company you can honestly praise ("I really love how your company _______") that might be enough to finesse it. (I got the job, BTW, and it's working out great.)
Job hunting is probably one of the most vulnerable, debilitating experiences one can go through - you feel so JUDGED (and you are) even when the criteria used have nothing to do with your objective self-worth. Congratulate yourself for recognizing that your current environment isn't working and having the insight and courage to take action. Good luck!
never apologize for a long post - get out whatever you need, however you need to; take all the space you need - it's cheap!!
i loved this post - you answered your own questions!!
you darn freakin right - your mental health is far more important than you resume!
as for reason - how bout something like: there's been alot of turnover there lately, and i'm looking for a more stable work environment.
that hints at the fact that lots of people are leaving and it sucks to work there; without putting to harsh a negative spin on it.... you can fiddle with the words and soften it more if you like...
lastly - i kinda wanna smack ya with a wet noodle :-).... i'm sure you don't need me to tell you - none of what you said reflects on YOU. nope scratch that - it DOES reflect on you - POSITIVELY!! it says you will stand up for yourself, and won't subject yourself to a toxic work environment! GFU!!!!! do i need to say - there's no friggin way in h*ll that makes you a failure??? it makes you a strong woman, willing to do what's right for YOU. anyone that doesn't appreciate that - is not worth your breath, or acquaintance.
OMG! You are my favorite person right now! I love everything you said. The interview didn't go as well as I thought. However, I get the feeling she just wanted my resume to reflect my qualifications more, and include references of a higher caliber. I'll be sending an updated resume with a cover letter, so pretty good news I suppose. I still have a job (even if it causes me increased stress). Easier to find a job when you have a job.
Thank you so very much. I have been a lot less stressed out the last couple days. I think even if I don't get an offer, I might be okay. I have a conference call next week with HR and the managing partners to discuss the next 90 days, so I'll see what comes of that.
i think part of the reason your feeling less stress, is because you started looking for another job - you did something proactive, for yourself. something that proactively and directly addresses the source of your stress!
that in and of itself - makes the stress more bearable! GFU i'd recommend keep going. even if you get another offer, if things look like they may turn around where your at - you can always pass on the offer, and give it a chance... if they fail you again - there's always another offer out there!!
don't let that toxicity seep into you. keep reminding yourself you've options, and if needed - keep exploring those options!
I love your encouragement! I heard a lot of this same information from another male friend of mine yesterday. I have to change my way of thinking. When I said I thought it would look bad on my resume that I wasn't even at my job for two whole years, he said it would not look bad. He said we are of the age that we are experienced, and my resume would reflect we are looking to plant roots. I liked that. Now I'm going to read all your meditation posts, cause God knows I need to learn some!
Gosh this sounds like a difficult place to work. I’m f it’s really giving you the same way I say start sending out your resume if you can stand to work until you get another job. Good luck with your choice which ever way you decide sounds like you won’t have trouble getting employment
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
Not Sure How Much More I Can Take
Not even sure what is wrong with me
Not sure how to approach it
how to feel complete?
Not sure how to function.
