A sensitive sort of a day for me

[Starrlight]

I know this isn’t a big deal at all but I need to let this out...Ever have a day when what normally wouldn’t phase you makes you tear up? Today I’m extra sensitive and I swear if one more person makes one more stupid comment, has an attitude towards me or puts me down I will yell. Maybe I should just yell now and get it over with. Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh sooooo..

My sister is coming over to paint in a bit. I typically feel a bit awkward around her. I can barely get into painting while alone so it’ll be a challenge.

Any tips that you use when feeling uncomfortable around people? Maybe there’s a good reason I’m uncomfortable around her. I’m afraid I’m going to not have fun, I’m afraid my art will stink I’m afraid she’ll make a mean comment even though she usually doesn’t. It’s just a day!!!! Thanks for listening.

[Florida1959]

Deep breath, and remember you control these feelings xxx protect yourself x

[Starrlight in reply to Florida1959]

Protect myself hmmmm thanks beautiful

[Iammesues in reply to Starrlight]

At any moment you can ask her to please leave. I know that seems awkward and impossible, but if someone is making you feel badly- IN YOUR HOUSE- they can politely be asked to leave

[Starrlight in reply to Iammesues]

Thanks Iammesues

[Nothing_but_books]

Extra sensitive, can't bear the world. Me. me. me.

Here's a thought,

Practice on me Starrlight. We've got this... 👍

Ready - Set - Here we go:

Where'd you get a dumb name like Starrlight from, huh? 👿

(response - go ahead blast me...)

Whadda ya gotta to be alone to paint for, huh? Show me with your best. Hey, is that all you've got? 👿

(response - give it to me good this time...)

Whadda ya mean we're not gonna have any fun. Stop laying about! I've got the whole day planned out for you....👿

(response - better grit your teeth first)

Hope and pray you're laughing hon. You'll get through this. I've got your back. Hell, we all do.

[Starrlight in reply to Nothing_but_books]

😂 😂 😂 you’re amazing

[Heartfancy]

If it helps, I too used to always feel awkward around my big sister. I think just knowing that I was enough for and of myself got me through a lot of that. And believe me this is something that didn’t come easy. I had to really almost do some “ self talk” sometimes just to be around her.

And I’m not going to put you down or berate you in anyway.

For me, and this might not be for you but I journal a lot. I don’t know if you do this or not but I do it and have for years.

Sometimes I’ll have a lot to write and sometimes I have just one sentence but I do it to not only go back and read what I write about but a lot of time it will let me see how far I’ve come.

Perhaps I might suggest that you write a few things that are great about your life and

what is great just about you, without any comparison of that or what you may feel is in comparison to her. I realize that it may be hard for you but if you just write ✍️ one thing, I guarantee that it will help.

[Starrlight in reply to Heartfancy]

I love it writing so writing in a journal is a good idea.

[Heartfancy in reply to Starrlight]

I’m glad you think it’s a good idea. I’ve been doing ever since I remember but especially since my psychotic episode 20 years ago. And I’ve learned a ton about myself.😎🕶

[Starrlight in reply to Heartfancy]

That’s awesome.

[Starrlight]

My sister was supposed to arrive at 2:00 I know she’s always late do I thought well she’ll be here by 3:00 well it’s 3:45 and I text her asking if she forgot that this morning we made a plan to paint. No answer. 👿

[sophie4]

Painting together is sacred...or so I thought. If your sister was my sister, my door would be locked at 2:15. And she didn't answer your text??? Don't feel hurt, Starrlight. This is your sister's loss...HER problem, Not YOUR problem. I'm very sorry this happened.

[Starrlight in reply to sophie4]

Guess what? It was a misunderstanding. She thought she was supposed to come today not yesterday when I was expecting her. Ha! I got upset for nooooo reason

[Iammesues in reply to Starrlight]

And how was the day together?

[sophie4]

So thrilled to learn this!!!!!!!!!1👍💜💜💜💜💜💜💙💙💙💙💙(why when I click on an emogi only these line show up???