Grieving loss: I wanted to share my... - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

87,608 members82,297 posts

Grieving loss

crecre profile image
22 Replies

I wanted to share my story and ask for support from this community. I have dealt with extreme depression, anxiety, and suicidal attempts for about 4 or 5 years now. I have an abusive father who has abused me physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially my entire life. My big brother was my biggest support and helped through my mental illness and I could talk to him about anything... He knew what was going on. I have great friends but I do not always want to rely on them for mental support as they are my friends, not my social workers. I do meet with my therapist once a week but there still seems to be a barrier in our relationship where I feel like I cannot really talk to her about everything. A few weeks ago, my brother passed away at the age of 25, and it has been really hard for me to deal with his loss along with my mental health as I was fighting to mainly stay alive for him. I was wondering if anyone wanted to chat to talk about my experiences as well as yours.

Written by
crecre profile image
crecre
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Read more about...
22 Replies

I am so sorry for the tragic loss of your Dear, Precious Brother, and so very young.

❤️🌹🌹🌹❤️

This is bad, what happened?

xx

crecre profile image
crecre in reply to Mary-intussuception

He has had health problems his entire life, he had a heart transplant, cancer, and a bunch of other things. He ended up dying because he had an aneurysm in his heart and we didn't make it to the surgery in time. He died in my arms.

Mary-intussuception profile image
Mary-intussuception in reply to crecre

This must have been traumatic

crecre profile image
crecre in reply to Mary-intussuception

Hardest thing I have ever gone through

Agora1 profile image
Agora1

My deepest sympathy to you and your family. xx

bonkers65 profile image
bonkers65

I am so sorry for your loss. I know you are having a hard time. (((HUGS)))

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003

I send my deepest sympathies and condolences to you and your family

Iammesues profile image
Iammesues

I’m so sorry. You have been through so much. I wish you rest and healing. I’m here for anything you want to say

goldieoldie profile image
goldieoldie

Hello,and welcome to this supportive forum;I am so sorry to hear of your brothers death and of your dreadful circumstances,; the loss of your brother will of course leave a huge impact on your well being ,as well as mentally,its important for you to get as much support as possible.....you can PM me if you wish -----I can understand the impact ,losing your brother ......as well as an abusive father.

Kamp2020 profile image
Kamp2020

I'm so sorry for your loss of your brother and best friend. I too had a very abusive father that I've had to recover from through years of counseling but for some reason the pain never goes away. He is deceased now but he seems to always be present. I'm here for you and will be praying for you.

crecre profile image
crecre in reply to Kamp2020

Do you have any tips for moving past it?

Kamp2020 profile image
Kamp2020 in reply to crecre

First you need to allow yourself to grieve. If you don't have a therapist get one. Make sure they work with people who have dealt with abuse. I journal lots and I wrote a letter to my dad and told him what I thought and hopefully some of your anger will come out. I then burned it up. It felt good to get my anger out and see itburned up. Believe that your a survivor and not a victim. I went years without seeing my dad, but once I had kids I would see him because of them. I have been in counseling for 40 years and things are better but sometimes the PTSD of the abuse shows it's ugly face. That's why I take meds too. I'm here for you so please keep on touch. Many blessings

Elle_Luv profile image
Elle_Luv

Grief is a long process. I lost my mom when I was 13. It will suck for a long while, but it was really helpful for me to kind of live my life for her. I find ways to honor her still in really small ways. Sometimes i’ll read her books, or do a painting in her honor. Let yourself cry, my brother and dad bottled it up and it made them turn really hostile and pretend like she never existed. It was helpful for me to talk with other family members that honored her in the way i did. It does get better and this pain will eventually subside, but it takes time. I’m so sorry for your loss

goldieoldie profile image
goldieoldie in reply to Elle_Luv

Elle-Luv,so sorry for the loss of your beloved mom,you were so very young and you must miss her everso much,!you are indeed doing well by honouring your mom and keeping her memory alive,and in doings so your mom will be delighted ,and saddened by your family for blocking her spirit in this way.I beleive in spiritual values and love that you can too.pm me anytime.....

crecre profile image
crecre in reply to Elle_Luv

I am sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine losing a parent that young. I think I will try to read him a book or something like that it sounds like a really nice idea. I know the grieving process never really stops. You do not get to move on you just have to move through. Thanks for sharing your story with me :)

Iammesues profile image
Iammesues in reply to crecre

Well said. I’ve never stopped grieving the loss of my dad 13 years ago. Moving through looks different for everyone. We are here to listen as you want

Eagle257 profile image
Eagle257

I would 🙏

Freakinout3 profile image
Freakinout3

Even before you said your brother was supportive I new that he died...makes sense... If my sister was supportive she would have died too... But she isn't supportive so she lives.... I'm in a similar situation... I thought my life would have been resolved by now but it isn't... I'm 49 and I suffered terribly and am still suffering.... I'm in a situation right now.... And I'm not enjoying it one bit.... The Tyranny of Evil Men... My life is turning out to be some tragic movie.... I wish I could say more... But I know what your going through...

crecre profile image
crecre in reply to Freakinout3

Would you like to share your situation?

Freakinout3 profile image
Freakinout3 in reply to crecre

I would, but I really am sick of telling it over and over... In fact I'm so out of my mind I'm not sure what is real and what is fantasy.

kenster1 profile image
kenster1

hi sorry to hear of your brothers passing thoughts and prayers with you and all concerned.thought I would mention a forum here called bereavement care and share its a supportive and very understanding community and maybe of added support to you.god bless and take care.

crecre profile image
crecre in reply to kenster1

Thank you so much! I will definitely join it

You may also like...

Grieving

me and him have come back like a flood. I feel like I'm silently grieving because I don't want to...

grieving friendship

laughed and shared it all. We were the very best of friends, Or at least that's what I thought....

Grieving Furbaby Momma

desperately searching for someone and anyone to just talk to. i am married and she is...

Grieving daughter

into a coma. I had to tell the doctors that she wanted a DNR...it was the worst case scenario for a...

Sad grieving want to hide but need to share here

have to be the one who loves me. I’m so sad...About my brother killing himself which intrusively...