Hi, I'm new...this is my first post so I don't know what exactly to report. There is too much to summarize. Lately I'm frustrated with my psychiatrist and meds management. I paused therapy because I was just crying after every session.
I guess to summarize...
I'm constantly thinking something is wrong with me. I constantly check my pulse/blood pressure/scan my body etc...I have OCD and with treatment I seemed to have gotten over most of my old compulsions but it seems all my anxiety has focused itself on my health and death. I also obsess on the meaning of it all, what happens when we die etc...I can't stop and I'm not living because of it. Anyone else feel the same?
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Broken1971
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Really struggling too Iam always thinking negative thoughts and thinking on how Iam feeling or any little symptoms I feel thinking the worst always and dealing with depersonalization hang in there you not alone
Thanks. I have all my yearly blood test/doctor's visits this week so I am on pins and needles. Just not knowing and the waiting for news is the hardest part. My mother died two weeks ago too so that has really aggravated things. Thanks so much for the reply.
Broken
There is very little we can do when it comes down to our death and passing over through the Golden Gates. I reached seventy in August and I originally felt a bit worried then I thought and looked back at earlier times of my life. What I remembered was I did not think I would have reached fifty or even sixty five when I was getting my pension and here I am seventy and anything more than three score years and ten seems like a bonus so now I sit here on my computer, reading books or doing the garden. The problem of thinking about turning the toes up is a real waste of time, I will worry about that as I look for St Peter to open those pearly Gates to let me in. We really cannot do anything about it, so you need to live for the day, the Devil can look after himself if we have been a bad person in life.
Your treatments seemed to have worked well for you, so now move on and look for hobbies or diversions to distract your worries and fears.
It is no use worrying regards your health it will just make you ill and that is no good for anyone
Hi Broken, This is anxiety. I went through the same feelings and worry. Nothing physically was wrong. It took a long time to get back to my self. I stayed in touch with people. I talked to friends and family about what I was experiencing and sometimes just talking about it helped. I worked with a therapist and have a psychiatrist. The meds I take ( antidepressant and anxiety) helped me. I no longer find that I need the anxiety med. I take yoga and exercise to keep active. Please find someone that will listen to your issues, hopefully a therapist or support group. God bless and stay in touch.You are definitely not alone in this.
I'm EXACTLY the same. Exercise helps and there is a meditation app called Insight timer with loads of free meditations, I'm doing one for health anxiety, 8 minutes and is great. I don't know your age but I have found I go through periods when I have this fear of death and nothingness. I had it as a 10-12 year old, then in my early thirties and now that I'm 48 again
Hi Sasical. I've had these obsessions since about 8 years old. I thought they would get easier to deal with as I grew older. I'm 49 now and it has been only getting tougher...the depression especially. I exercise pretty regularly but unlike most people...the more I get my blood pumping the stronger my feelings get...good or bad. I've literally started sobbing on the eliptical machine. Ugh! Things are bad now too because my mother just died a couple weeks ago so you can imagine how that helps. Thanks for the suggestions about the apps. I'll look into that. Be well
It sounds as if you have an inherited tendency to anxiety, and your latest symptomd have been triggered by the recent death of your mother. You are still grieving and coming to terms with your mother's passing. It takes time but gradually the pain and sense of loss will diminish.
Her death has resurrected an interest in your own mortality. But your nervous system is highly sensitised through your anxiety disorder - so all your fears and concerns are magnified ten fold.
You have no reason to fear for your own life and health: anxiety is an imposter that plants the thought in our mind that we have some terminal illness. Yet anxiety does not have the power to inflict death and disease, only the ability to make us worry over things that are no threat to us.
So when you have these bad feelings keep telling yourself that you are not in harm's way, no matter how realistic your symptoms feel. Accept the feelings rather than fight them: fighting only causes more stress and tension which releases more fear hormones thus maintainimg the over sensitivity of your nerves.
It is natural not to want to die before our time. Once again nervous sensitivity magnifies and exaggerates this normal concern into a feeling of impending doom.
You ask what happens when we die, what is the meaning of it all and I will give you my answer. We are here to evolve to a higher form: this we do by minimising our faults, cultivating our virtues and acquiring greater wisdom. Things that hold us in good stead with what comes after and is in accord with what people of faith call 'the progression of all souls.'
I hope that as you come to terms with the loss of your parent your health anxiety will resolve and your life will enter a calmer period.
Exactly! This is what I need to hear. I know these things but they don't resonate when I'm stuck in my anxiety. It helps to hear this from someone else. It really means a lot. Thank you!
I feel like this ever since I was diagnosed with cll leukemia. I think about death and more illness everyday it's Like I'm being tortured and can't enjoy anything anymore I was also recently diagnosed with diabetes. But im trying to reverse it. It's a never ending cycle. I hope u get the help u need.
So sorry to hear about your diagnoses. I wish you all the best. I find that when a real medical emergency comes along that I handle it ok...it's just the waiting for appointments...waiting for test results etc...the uncertainty. I forget to live life and I hope we can both learn to do that again! Thanks for sharing.
I hear this question a lot. What’s the point in living. Like you said you are not living. What can we do to help you start living again? Don’t go off your meds without telling your doctor. I can share with you what I take, bc it makes my life better. Don’t talk about death
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