how do i comfort a loved one who's grieving?

[aumiracle]

my bestfriends mother has cancer and she wus currently rushed to the hospital about a week ago. the doctors say to prepare urself for the worst in this case ( death) she is so lost right now . she called me one day crying and i cried with her . i felt so helpless and overwhelmed all i could do was cry and i feel incredibly selfish for mot being more supportive. i have no idea wut to say to her how to comfort her in this time. only someone whos been through this can understand her pain

[Ladybug9]

Just be there for her. Let her cry, listen, whatever she needs. Sometimes people that are afraid or hurting don't necessarily want suggestions or advice, they just want to be heard, to listen to them, and to know someone understands their fear and pain!

[aumiracle in reply to Ladybug9]

thank you so much. im currently unable to see her physically do u have any tips for comforting her over the phone ?

[Ladybug9 in reply to aumiracle]

Do the same thing but just not in person. Tell her how much you love her, that you will pray for her and her mom and that you are there for her with whatever she needs. Then just let her talk and or cry. It will mean the world to her that you care so much about her. And tell her you are available to talk no matter what time it is. Knowing she isn't alone and has someone to count on, is so important.

[aumiracle in reply to Ladybug9]

you dont know how much this means to me . thank you ❤️

[Ladybug9 in reply to aumiracle]

You are so welcome. I understand losing a parent. My mom lived with me for over a year before I lost her to cancer. Whether it's quickly or slowly, the pain is the same. I had my bestfriend, Tom, who lived next door helping me every minute and was there to comfort me afterward. And he did a lot of listening! Please let me know how she's doing? I would appreciate it.

[Ladybug9 in reply to Ladybug9]

I am the queen of looking up quotes, writing them down and saving them in books. I just found one and immediately thought of you so I want to share it with you....

Want to help a grieving friend? Let them be sad. The thing is, we can't cheer someone up by telling them everything will be okay. Our job, honestly, is to feel awkward and stay there anyway, whether in person or on the phone. Just hang right out with their pain.

[aumiracle in reply to Ladybug9]

im truly so sorry for your loss ❤️ how are you holding up now? i hope all is going well with you and thank you so much for thinking of me this is everything i needed u were really a god send to me 🙏🙏

[aumiracle in reply to Ladybug9]

and ofc ill keep u updated do u have a social media i can add u on ?

[Ladybug9 in reply to aumiracle]

What social media are you speaking of? I'm in a few.

[aumiracle in reply to Ladybug9]

instagram

[Ladybug9 in reply to aumiracle]

Actually yes, I'm on Instagram.

[OR4377 in reply to Ladybug9]

Excellent point Ladybug. It’s in most people’s nature to want to fix a situation.

Most times it means the world to a person to simply know you are there for them🌻

[thepassionateflower]

in my experience, it can sometimes be really difficult to know what to say or how to comfort someone who is grieving or concerned about a loved one. listening to them is all you can do 🤍 so so sorry for her and her family. what a terrible time, but how lucky they are to have you as a friend!

[aumiracle in reply to thepassionateflower]

thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️ youre so kind

[kenster1]

let them know you will be at hand in the hour of need either through meeting texts or even emails its a difficult time but she will need her family as much as anything.although its not the end she could still be grieving so maybe you could suggest counselling.

[kvolm2016]

We all feel this way when trying to comfort others in their grief but I agree with others that just letting your friend know you care, just listening and letting them talk, just asking them how you can help are all helpful. When my dad was dying I had someone share several articles for me to read about the grieving process and what to expect and I found that to be helpful. Here is something similar that you might share with your friend if you think it would help :bit.ly/33f5g9B

[Hidden]

Can't stop all suffering

But

Slowing it

Is

Doing something

Delay between when u care

And it's effect

U

Are

Helping

U didn't abandon her

Etc e

U

R

Helping