will anything actually get better? - Anxiety and Depre...

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will anything actually get better?

lifegoesoniguess profile image

I'm new here and never really told others what is going on in my mind and how I actually feel towards myself. When i started secondary school I was bullied through all the years and I have now just finished and I start college this September. In school I always was told how sad and moody of a person I was, I tried to ignore it but it's not that simple. Most of the time I would come home crying my eyes out and thinking to myself how much I want to die. My parents aren't the easiest people to talk to either as they normally give the same answer such as, "they're probably jealous". or "just ignore them". When it came to the start of my last year a council came in and had a chat to me and she ended up suggesting therapy, that of course never helped. Throughout these past months I've tried feeling more happy with myself but that didn't last long and I have now become sad, lonely and wanting to give up. Now when I'm around my parents I just put on a fake smile and hide the emptiness I feel inside and I feel like I can't keep it there forever and want help but I'm worried that I'll get judged as I can never trust others nowadays.

16 Replies
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I know all about putting on fake smiles. While people mean well when they say things like ignore it. They don't understand just how hurtful it is. I'm so sorry you feel empty and like you want to give up. I am here for you. I will be a friend who you can confide in anything we talk about will be just between us. You will never be judged by me. Message me anytime. When I'm feeling like you I think of something my friend told me. He said Life is the test of a true warrior. That always stuck with me and is my rallying cry. Stay strong, sending irie vibrations, one love.

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lifegoesoniguess in reply to Hidden

thank you so much. I'm also sorry you have also experienced it

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Hidden in reply to lifegoesoniguess

Mahalo. But I'm used to it. My smiles maybe far and few between but the ones I have now are genuine.

I can't tell you that things will get better, but I can say that you will have good days and bad days. Even people with no "issues" have good and bad days. We just have to fight for them a little bit harder. I think you are going to find college a big change and a lot of good things will happen for you. I too was bullied throughout my childhood and was even made to feel "stupid" by a math teacher in grammer school. But I decided in my 30's to go to college! The best thing I ever did. I gained so much confidence and realized the difference between what I call the "kindergarten" kids and the grown up kids. . Although I'm sure you know it's not healthy to keep your true feelings inside, we all do it depending on the situation and who we are around. And then we cry alone. I'm glad you are here! I would love to hear how things are going in school, and how we can help you gain the confidence and self-esteem you seem to be lacking in. I still lack those things at times but then realize I can only allow people to treat me they way I allow. Again, welcome and I'm really glad you joined a great place! And in closing, I don't mean you "lack" the things that you are concerned about, you just haven't had a way to find them within you!

thank you so much for that reply! hopefully college will be good as I'm excited for a fresh new start and meeting new people. I hope that you're also doing well and are having a great day/night

Please keep in touch with me and let me know how much you are loving college!!! I was a D and F student all through my school years until I gained confidence in myself and turned into an A and B student in college! I am so excited for you!

Will do! Also I hopefully will achieve better grades as in high school they were D and C. I can only do better.

You've got this!! I have complete faith in your abilities!!!

Thank you so much for understanding :)

hey, dear, don't be afraid to cry. it's natural and human. I wish I could say I knew what to tell you about how miserable you feel, but maybe some friends would help? they can be a great distraction. maybe you can't find any in school, maybe try neighbors or focusing your time on helping out others. I find voluntary work really helpful not just to me, but helping others who need it really appreciate it.

I get that, I start a new job in a couple weeks and I know it will help me take my mind off of the things that crash down in me. Thank you for the reply!

you're welcome, i'm a message away if you'd ever like to talk or anything! :)

Thank you! that makes both of us :)

I'm so sorry you are feeling that way and battling a lasting sorrow. Depression is hard to overcome and stress is thru the roof. Some things many use to counteract it are the following: A good multi vitamin to give your body what it needs to feel better. Esp extra magnesium to calm your mind body and spirit, magnesium malate is one of the best, mag. citrate can cause diarrhea. Almonds are a great food high in magnesium. Ginseng is great to get rid of the sticky negative thoughts that loop!! Helps so much! Get outside, barefoot and no sunscreen to get grounded and get vit. D which is a mood enhancer. Walks are great, esp w a trusted person to talk with. Hope these help you too! <3 80% of Americans are low in magnesium!

Leave the high school years in the past, college is so different and you will be surprised how well you will do. <3

thanks you for that comment :) hopefully college will be a great new chapter in life and I agree to the fact that I need to enhance my bodies health.

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