Parents

[Suzhou]

I moved home for the summer. Today my mom found out I’m on anti depressants and I’m in therapy. It’s not like I’ve kept it from her on purpose. I’m just so use to living alone and I’m such a private person it didn’t come up. She then told me she was sad that I couldn’t talk to her about my mental health. Sometimes I like my privacy and sometimes I need to go through things by myself. She was still not to happy. My mom knows I’m depressant but she doesn’t know how depressed. When I’m depressed I feel like I’m constantly having to comfort those around me who are worried about me. That’s why I don’t tell many people. I can’t comfort her while try to get better. I just need some privacy I guess. Is anyone else going through this?

[Hidden]

Put yourself first, you don’t have to prove anything to anyone! Take care of yourself 😊

[Keb8250]

I told my mother about my anxiety and she doesn’t understand how serious it is but don’t bottle stuff like that up inside it’s not healthy. it’s always better to talk to the right person , not someone who’s gonna make it worst .Depression is serious as well and you can message me anytime.

[Suzhou in reply to Keb8250]

Aw thank you 🖤🖤🥰

[hypercat54]

Hi tell your mum you would be happy to talk to her when able to. Also say professional help is more what's needed at the moment. That will reassure her she isn't a bad mother.

[Suzhou in reply to hypercat54]

I feel sometimes if I don’t tell her everything she thinks she’s a bad mother. I reassure her all the time.

[Hidden]

Yes Iv done that for years. To protect the people I love. You sound like you got this, and good on you for taking anti depressants and therapy. Your looking after yourself and should feel proud. Us mums always worry that’s what we do, lol

Please focus on yourself explain to your mum you are dealing with it.

Its not easy talking to family members, not all of it comes out or is worked through. Sometimes we just need that extra professional talking therapy.

Depression is so very common .. some good books out there too.

Keep up the good work, I hope you feel stronger soon.

[Suzhou in reply to Hidden]

Ya she’s a very in your business type mom. She’s always been. This is something I need to do on my own.

[Hidden in reply to Suzhou]

My daughter says that to me. I’m always in her business.

It’s because I love her and don’t want her to hurt.

However, i’m learning now lol .. she’s grown up lady not a child. I need to butt out! I am trying ! she knows where i am if she needs me. It’s a horrible feeling trying to protect your parents from things, as i use to do that too, and still do to an extent.

It’s draining looking after our selves and getting in a good place. Never mind looking out for them worrying about us. So i’m trying hard to focus on myself. Even if that means hiding away sometimes. This way I get how my daughter must feel sometimes too.

Take Care x

[Suzhou in reply to Hidden]

I can’t imagine being a parent. That’s why I let so many things go because I know my mom cares. I can’t be open with her all the time she is a strict Christian and if I fall out of line I get lectured about how I’m going to hell. I love her. As a kid we don’t want to see our parents worry about our personal issues. We all seem to care about one another. Hope everything turns out well 🖤

[Hidden]

Sometimes we need a neutral party to step in. It can be a good thing to talk to someone who isn't connected to your family in any way, shape or form. I believe that real progress can be made that way because you are free to be yourself without being met with judgement. As close as I am to my parents, there are issues that I know would be meant with hasty judgement. My favorite one (being facetious here) is "our family just doesn't act like that". Yeah, whatever....

[Suzhou in reply to Hidden]

I felt that 😂 it’s good to talk to someone that isn’t in your family. My mom likes to say “it’s family courtesy” when I tell her I need some privacy.

[Hidden in reply to Suzhou]

She says that? Oh dear....

I think sometimes parents forget they were young once and that maybe they even had issues growing up.

I can see it now. Your grandma telling your young mom "it's family courtesy" and your mom silently being like "oh buzz off, will ya?"

[Suzhou in reply to Hidden]

😂😂 who knows. To this day my grandmas always on my moms case about her life. So you could be right! Not only do I have to deal with my mom. I have to pick up the pieces when my grandma is still mean to her! -_- family is crazy sometimes!

[Hidden in reply to Suzhou]

Sure is!