What advice would you give to yoursel... - Anxiety and Depre...

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What advice would you give to yourself in your younger years?

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Well if i can go back in time and speak to myself in my earlier days, trust me my anxiety would not be so high. I wish i would have spent more, time with my grandparents, dont get me wrong now, we were really close, but when there were rainy days i didn't want to go see them, they are with god, now, thats about the only thing i would change, other than than that, we had a good relationship. When i was in high school, i had a friend who use to skip school, alot, i bent over backwards, to encourage him not to do that. He rejected that offer, and stayed on that path. That really did get to me, the fact that my bestfriend didn't want to hang out with me, at least that was my thinking process as a teen. Thats one thing about me, that i dont really, like, is that i take almost everything really seriously. Another, time as a teen, my first girlfriend, were, at 17. When we first met, she said she had just got out of a relationship, but now she want to focus on me. I should, have known better than that, how can you focus on me, when you are fresh out of a relationship, but that was my thinking process as a teen. Only if i could, have caught myself in my younger years, and not let everyone in my heart, maybe i wouldn't be so sensitive now. I had a friend that, was having an affair with this married, man and she knew he was married, it would be one thing if she didnot no, but she knew what she was geting herself into. So one day the guy, wife came home, and cought, my friend in her house, a altercation took place, and the woman end up putting my friend in a wheelchair permanently. I wish i could have stoped the altercation but in this lifetime, when you choose the behavior, you choose, the consequences that come with it. Anyways if you guys could go back in time and change somethings about yourself, are some of the choices that you made, thats having a impact, on you now, what would it be? I would love to hear back from you.

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I would find a way to convey that I wasn't responsible for all the unhappiness and resentment and vengefulness going on around me - and applied to me if I stepped out of line.

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Hidden in reply to Wallowa

Hey Wallowa thanks for your response. I really understand what you just said alot. I think sometimes we as people, blame ourselves for every little thing that take place in our lives. Thats why we as people, be so stressed, because of some stuff that we cant even control. I love your point!!!

I would advise my younger self:

- That it is not up to me to be responsible for the happiness of each and every one around me.

- That it is okay to say NO to loved ones on things that are very important to you.

- That it does not matter what people might think.

- That sometimes selfishness is needed. It is not selfish. It is you being less selfless.

These are what come to mind at the moment. I am sure there is more I would advise my younger self. Will add later :)

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Hidden in reply to BrokenWings83

I agree, with you, sometimes in life we have to let, our love ones know this is were, i put my foot down, we love our family, but sometimes we have to think about our feelings. Great point BrokenWings83, thanks.

I would tell my young self to not put so much into guys and focus more on female friendships. I don’t have to have a boyfriend. I would tell myself to not be so quick to disregard people and hold tight to good friends.

I would also say to stay away from a particular ex because he was a big reason for my anxiety coming back and having trust issues in relationships.

I would also tell myself to think before speaking/acting when upset because that got me into a lot of trouble as a young person.

Take more risks. Go to Duke University when they sent you the offer (even if you were scared to be so far from home).

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Hidden in reply to KittenMittens22

Hey, KittenMittens22, and thanks for your insight, what you said was very, interesting and enlighten, you made alot, awesome points. I would have also told my younger self to stay away from my ex, because, a long time ago she use to say if we cant work things out and if i decide i dident want a relationship with her we can always be friends. She use to get me with that alot cause she know i still had feelings, for her, but eventually that got old, and i had to cut ties with her, besause she were bringing me down with that toxic, energy. Sometimes when we dont think before speaking, it can come back too hunt us, i agree with that point to. You are a very intelligent person, thanks alot.

I would seek help as a teenager. I would’ve talked to a counselor. Maybe I could’ve avoided so many set backs in life. Maybe I’d be better and feel better. I wish someone would’ve wanted to listen. But it’s never too late.

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Hidden in reply to 8Bee

Hey 8Bee, and thank you very much for your response. I agree with every, single word that you just stated. You are so right about that, its never to late, i think everything happen for a reason. I have heard stories, about people, who use to live in cars, and literally had know home to go to. And now they are millionaires. Sometimes god will drag you to threw hell, just to get you to heaven. Its a reason why i have anxiety attacks , maby thats a set up, for happiness.

8Bee
8Bee in reply to Hidden

You have no idea how I needed to hear that. I just found out I’m on the list for layoffs. Haven’t been formally notified but the anxiety is debilitating. Comments like yours is what I like about this online community. Let’s keep each other strong.

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Hidden in reply to 8Bee

Thats one reason why i got on here, is too bend over backwards to help great people like yourself, at the same time to seek help from great people like yourself. Im glad that you are alive im glad that you are expressing yourself, and im glad that god is going to help you threw this hard time, im glad that you are a tough person, and you are not going to give up untile you win big time. I will keep you strong, and you are already keeping me strong.

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Don't let the Bully's win.

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Very well said. But you was a winner thin, and you are a winner now.

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