help

[scarlet283]

i’m new here. i needed support. i feel so alone. i’ve been feeling sad and miserable for so long now. its been more than 2 years that i’m crying almost every second night. there’s this boy that i am in love with. he’s in love too. we’re together. but it has never worked. i don’t know if i am depressed or always crying because of him? i’m thinking of a break up. i can’t stop crying. i don’t know what to do

[Rosiemarie82]

Stop and breathe first.

The fact that you mentioned it in your post suggests that him not working bothers you. Have you talked to him about it?

[Thetealharp]

Sorry you are feeling bad

[amypinkspecs]

Sending you a big hug. Deep breaths. Have you tried speaking to a friend or doctor? There’s also a text service you might find helpful called Shout. Text SHOUT to 85258 anytime to start a conversation. It’s free and you can find out more about them online x

[Uhhellohowareudoing]

You sound depressed and if that is the case no matter what you do with your relationship you will always feel sad

[kvolm2016]

hey scarlet, I just noticed your post and I wanted to say welcome and I hope you do feel supported here. I'm sorry that it has been such a difficult 2 years. Do you suspect that the sadness is related to the relationship or did it exist prior to him being in your life? Do you feel like you can recognize and name the things that are making you sad? Or is it that there is truly nothing that lifts you out of the sadness? And what does your boyfriend have to say about your sadness? Is he even aware or do you try to keep it hidden from him? I'd love to talk with you here.

[scarlet283 in reply to kvolm2016]

that’s what i’m trying to find out. if i’m sad anyways or only because of him. the moment i come back from any gathering and i’m alone again, it hits me. my boyfriend is aware, he is trying but it i don’t feel he is trying.

[kvolm2016 in reply to scarlet283]

Did the sadness exist before you were in the relationship with him? What would it look like for him to show you/prove to you that he is trying?

[Hidden]

I know how you feel! I’m in a relationship as well & it’s long distance. It’s extremely hard and I never thought i’d get into something like that but I did and It’s been working out so far but we don’t get along sometimes or quite understand one another because of the distance! I’ve thought about breaking up with him because things just haven’t gone the way I want them to but we worked things out. You can PM me if you like! but why do you feel like it never has worked?

[scarlet283 in reply to Hidden]

too many fights, we are different people with different expectations

[Hidden in reply to scarlet283]

Yeah I understand! My boyfriend and I would just disagree on things or I would make a big deal out of something so small because I thought about all the “what if’s” and what would happen. But you can’t really look at that because you won’t be able to control it anyway but I get very worried he’s not telling me everything sometimes. We are very different from each other! The age gap is 8 years so we’re at different stages in life and it’s hard to understand each other most days. Especially coming from two different countries. I’m sorry you’re going through this and sorry for blabbering on lol. But why don’t you have a talk with him about all of this if you haven’t already?

[scarlet283 in reply to Hidden]

i can relate, things that bother me are small to my boyfriend . i’ve talked to him several times, we’re both trying to adjust

[Hidden in reply to scarlet283]

Yeah that’s how it was with us! He gets so frustrated when I have anxiety because he knows I don’t need to worry about those things. But it’s hard not to