Depersonalization, anxiety, depression

[Clucat11]

Ive been going through depersonalization for almost 5 months now. Im trying to get used to it but it got harder during this quarantine.. i have few good days but then the bad days make everything worse.

[Hidden]

How have things been going since your last message? You said your experiencing this but how often throughout your day does this happen? When you’re talking in normal conversation, eating breakfast, etc?

[Clucat11 in reply to Hidden]

I almost experience it 24/7 . Always feeling like im in a dream, or that im not in control of what i say or do(even though i dont do anything irrational ) but still i feel like im not in control. Like im a total different person.. its been like that since January.. i started to get better in Mars but the quarantine made it all come back. I also suffer from panic attacks because of it and it makes it worse.. honestly? I just feel like im going crazy all the time. Sometimes i can control my negative thoughts but sometimes i feel this fog inside my head.. i just feel weird and not myself

[Freespirit427]

Hi! I have these sometimes and really hate it. Have you tried grounding techniques?

[Clucat11 in reply to Freespirit427]

I've tried meditation, exercise, distraction... the problem is that i obsessed over it so now im kinda stuck with it.. anyway im trying this medication i hope it helps, if it doesn't im just gonna let it go on its own

[Freespirit427 in reply to Clucat11]

I understand...I am trying meditation and mindfulness it’s helping but I have to be consistent🙄 hang in there ! Don’t give up! I thought I was the only one feeling this, you sharing your story is helping others❤️ we will get through this🤗

[Silverlining101]

Can you explain everything that happens when you go through it. I think i have experienced it a few times. Very scary. But then again I dont know if its that or what it is. I just know when the scary feeling happens. I think the worst.

[Clucat11 in reply to Silverlining101]

I feel like I'm always dreaming.. or in someone else's memory, i constantly have this unpleasant and weird feeling which sometimes leads to a lot of anxiety or panic attacks. I feel like everyone i know are strangers to me or like they are a part of my imagination. Sometimes i feel like im a robot or like im not myself at all. As if i dont have control over anything

[Silverlining101]

Wow yes I get this. I find myself sometimes wondering if this is all a matrix or some weird experience like a puppet show. My eyes get weird when it happens and i get scared thinking im going to faint. Like a quick flash of light or something. I dont know if its in my head or what? I have had so many test done health wise. Hope we get better

[Clucat11 in reply to Silverlining101]

Yes i get blurred vision as well. I have it mixed with anxiety which kinda sucks and i have ir 24/7🙁 i did so many tests as well like my hormones and vitamins and everything was okay. So my only hope was a psychiatrist and now im on medication.

[Silverlining101]

Yea I was just thinking its feel like im glitching when it happens. I know it sounds weird its just awful. It ruins my whole day. I have generalized anxiety too but i refused to take the medicine regularly because i was in a constant fog. They say it gets better but ive been using cbd oil and it works my panic attacks were every day all day Er visits every week. Migraines. It really has gotten so much better. I still have rough days but atleast im not crying constantly anymore.

[Clucat11 in reply to Silverlining101]

Im so glad you're feeling better now. Yes medications arent always the answer but im giving this one a try and i hope it helps. I wish you a life full of happiness.

[Silverlining101]

You as well. Take care!

[Hidden]

I know how difficult it is. I've had chronic depersonalization since age 14. At first, it scared me to death when it happened in one instant. One thing that helps is to remember the more you fear the symptoms the worse it gets. It's good if you can do some mindful meditation too. As a lifelong anxiety sufferer I know it's natural to dwell on your thoughts. I'm going to get a therapist who does video sessions. Try to get help with it. Please feel free to write back. Quarantine has been brutal for us🤚