Depression and Anxiety: Hello! This is... - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support
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Depression and Anxiety

Edsia
Edsia

Hello! This is my first time sharing this with anyone who's not family and friends but I think I suffer from depression and anxiety. It started last year and I thought I was going through a mild nostalgia phase (left my home to study in a foreign country) but it's still going on this year and it's a hundred times worse than when it started. I feel like a constant failure, I'm doubting myself and my capacities. I used to be a straight A student and I can barely get a D now. I really don't know how to stop it. I started seeing a psychologist but the negative thoughts won't go away. At times, I just want to leave my apartment and go jump off the bridge that's a hundred feet away from me. It's suffocating and I feel like I keep spiraling down with each passing day. If anyone can help, it would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

11 Replies
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Welcome to the forum.

Thank you

Welcome Exsia. I have anxiety and depression too. The thing about anxiety is, it can lie and it can be very convincing!!

You are not failure, but I hear you feel like it. You are an A student who left the familiar. That took a lot of courage. Anxiety brings with it that fight or flight sensation. What did the psychologist suggest? There are things to help cope but honestly it takes a bit of time. How are you sleeping? Eating? Getting some sunshine?

Edsia
Edsia
in reply to Tealribbon

Thank you, Tealribbon. I only saw the psychologist once, and I have about 2 more weeks to wait before I can see her again. I try as much as I can to stay healthy and all but I don't think it's making much of a difference.

Tealribbon
Tealribbon
in reply to Edsia

Well, honestly, I understand. My anxiety makes even simple tasks overwhelmingly difficult. I have a counselor and when I talk with her I feel better for a bit. I really try to do one day at a time....sometimes just one hour at a time. Have you made friends where u r studying?

Edsia
Edsia
in reply to Tealribbon

I actually have friends from my country with me. It's just that I don't have the energy to entertain people and act like I'm alright. It wears me out. So I stay alone.

Welcome Edsia, you’re in the right place. I just recently joined this site and I’ve so far been overwhelmed by the support. I also suffer from depression and I have found school to be infinitely harder because of it. Is there any support system at your school? If so it might be worth while checking out. Sometimes even taking a reduced course load if enough to make a difference. Don’t beat yourself up, keep your head high and keep on trying.

Edsia
Edsia
in reply to Solidrain

Thank you for the support, Solidrain! I am seeing a psychologist outside of school. I do hope that helps me get better.

I'm sorry to hear that I all too well know about anxiety & depression. I've suffered with it for years. Have you seen a therapist? You really need to go talk to somebody suicide is NOT the answer GET HELP!!! I myself thought about suicide in the past before but I got help! I can completely relate to what you're going through. I'm here if you need to chat.

Don’t let your grades define you. From my understanding other countries have harder courses and teachings. I feel like Americans aren’t given as god of an education. Try not to be so hard on yourself. Studying in a different country is going to be challenging. You are more than a letter grade.

Try to find something that makes you happy. A beautiful place to sit and enjoy. A favorite food dish. Nurture yourself. The more you do that brings you joy, the more feel good endorphins your brain will produce. Sunshine and exercise is also supposed to be a way to induce endorphins.

Thank you, KittenMittens22! I sing and read a bit but it's always just a fleeting relief, it never lasts long enough. Really going through the motions here. I hope winter break can help me figure out a bit more. Also, not from the USA :) but yes, this last year is really turning out to be a battle against myself.

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